Photo Courtesy: iface cover
We all have flaws, mistakes, things we are not so proud of. We all have things within us that remain buried; secrets we wouldn’t want people to know about. But sometimes we feel so helpless so we let people into our dark world, we tell them our secrets, our fears and our regrets. We allow them to see the real us by being vulnerably honest. And sometimes people get to know our flaws just by chance. They perhaps weren’t supposed to know… but the risk here is; are they going to keep your secret?
There are people who look so angelic, so pious, so good then you somehow get to know of their flaw, their bad habit that could ruin their CV, what do you do with that information? Call a press conference? Do an exposé or perhaps get a live footage to crucify them? Do you go around saying, ‘I always knew these pious people are hypocrites?’ And if the person was never pious in the first place do you go about saying, ‘look at the mate of shaitan?’ It doesn’t really matter how you do it; whether you just bad mouth them or go to worst extents of exposing them on social media or the internet, it just isn’t right.
You know people keep forgetting one important thing; that even the best of people fall in the trap of shaitan and the worst people eventually change to be wonderful people. We forget that Iblis was once the most pious creature in the heavens then what happened to him? We forget that we are all so vulnerable to fall in that same ugly trap that we crucify others for.
How do we forget the story of the very pious man who was approached by 3 brothers who were travelling for a very long time. They trusted him with their younger sister and that he be’s her guardian while they were are away. The pious man was as pure as ever. He protected the girl and would always take food to her place, knock the door and leave the food at the door before she came out. But shaitan started whispering in his ears, he started talking to the girl and that went on until he slept with her. The girl became pregnant and gave birth. The pious man was not yet set free from shaitan’s trap for he was convinced to go on and kill both the child and the girl. That once very pious man became a zannii, a murderer, a betrayer. How then are we so confident of ourselves when we wash others publicly and mock them for their misdeeds? How many times have we heard of very arrogant, very ignorant, very bad people who turned back to Allah? So who are we to judge and spread word of the misdeeds of others? Doesn’t it scare you that someday you could fall in the same trap or even worse? That perhaps the best way to do this is approach someone nicely and correct them, guide them, pray for them, help them and be there for them when they need to change? It’s true sometimes they don’t see the mistakes they are making. They see nothing wrong with themselves so they get rebellious when told the bitter truth about what they do. They may not accept your help. All you have to do is pray for them and keep trying. Give them space when they need one…but just don’t stop praying for them.
There are so many stories around us and since the time of the prophet of how people have greatly changed their ways. We are not better than those that we talk about. We are not any more pious or holy for pointing out people’s mistakes. Not unless it is very necessary and you are perhaps looking for help from other people to join in helping the person then it just isn’t right.
Human Beings are imperfect, we are prone to commit sins but the Worst sin is exposing your brother. In the Literal Meaning of Ali Ibn Abi Talib’s quote he says Never look down upon a Sinner because You never Know if he repents. Yes we are in Dark Ages (Akhir Zamaan) where Sinning Openly has been the order of the day but that does NOT qualify us to Uncover the Sinners. Look how the Prophet taught us: Ibn ‘Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: Messenger of Allah (ﷺ ) said, “A Muslim is a brother of (another) Muslim, he neither wrongs him nor does hand him over to one who does him wrong. If anyone fulfills his brother’s needs, Allah will fulfill his needs; if one relieves a Muslim of his troubles, Allah will relieve his troubles on the Day of Resurrection; and if anyone covers up a Muslim (his sins), Allah will cover him up (his sins) on the Resurrection Day”. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
One other very scary thing about life is that you just don’t know at what state you are going to die. You don’t know how low or high your imaan will be at sakratul maut. You don’t know how much you’d have changed by then. So before you crucify anyone for their sins, remember you have your own to repent for. This doesn’t mean it is okay what they are doing. Sins are sins. There is no justification. It also doesn’t mean they can get away with their dirty secrets. It just means you are going to give them the benefit of doubt where there is no proof, you are going to correct them but in a nice way and separately not in front of other people. That you are going to help them correct themselves when they need it. That you are only going to talk about it when it is very necessary to do so. Otherwise, when your brother lets you see their flaws and mistakes be sure to tell them, ‘Bro, i’m going to help you. I got it covered.’
Always remember this:
من ستر مسلما ستره الله يوم القيامة
Man satara musliman satarahullaahu yaumal qiyama (Muslim)
Translation: Whoever covered the disgrace of a Muslim then Allah will cover her shame on the Day of Judgement…