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It’s true that in this life you can never do everything alone, even the heroes and achievers we watch and see, at some point they need someone else to assist them in some way. The question though is, how much help can you ask for before it becomes unacceptable? How much asking is too much?

My brother and his friend have this sort of mantra which goes like, ‘You can’t ask prezzo for a sleepover.’ I mean, however close you are to the president, it just wouldn’t be right whenever you are in town you call him for a place to sleep right? What then happens when you desperately need him to sponsor your new project or maybe need his support when you vie for some political seat after you’ve used all your infinite chances asking for petty things? So whenever they are stranded and are thinking of ways out, they’d remind themselves that they should only ask for help from someone when it is ABSOLUTELY necessary. Wise move should I say?

This got me thinking; this is something most of us do without actually thinking. You know like you could be having this friend who is always willing to help you with anything. So you just over-do it with the say, ‘we are friends right? They signed up for this.’ So you go all the way from sending them to buy you that dress you saw at the mall to requesting for airtime to asking for loans to requesting for endless favours. But what happens when you suddenly lose your money and have no fare to get you home? Or when you are terribly sick with no enough money for medication? By this time, your dear loyal friend is exhausted by your endless requests. Who then do you turn to? Let’s face it; there is only so much one can handle. They will tolerate you for as long as they can but some day they’ll just say it out loud, ‘I quit!’ And trust me, friends like these, you lose them and that’s it. No one likes being used let alone being OVER-USED.

It’s the same thing when you decide to ask for an advance at work but the advance is for you to buy some latest smartphone. Or when you use up all your off days for petty stuff like attending a birthday party. What then happens when you need a day to go for a mega interview?

Maybe we should really look at every chance we get to be golden. As golden as the three wishes of Aladdin. Maybe every time we want to ask for something from someone we should ask ourselves, ‘If I just had three chances to make a wish to this same person, would this still be important or necessary?’ If you check, the wise people, whenever someone tells them, ‘I owe you one’ they never quickly jump in to say, ‘Buy me pizza then’ or ‘Buy me this attire’ or ‘Take me to this place’. They say, ‘I’ll save that chance for a better day.’ Because yes, some chances and opportunities don’t come back twice.

By the way, i’m sure you’ve heard or even done this yourself. There may be a time where someone asked you for help and you quickly rush to assist them because, ‘He has never asked for a favour before. This seems to be something very important to him.’ Unlike someone who keeps running to you for everything, you wouldn’t take them THAT seriously would you?

So yes, don’t always let your friend be the one to pay for your dinner. Sometimes be the one to pay for theirs. Don’t always be quick to ask for favours at the slightest problem you face. Don’t take people for granted by how much help they offer you. Don’t use people however much they love you. Friendship, family or any other kind of bond, it has to be two-way. So help so that you can be helped too. But it should be within limits because yes, too much of anything is unhealthy and sometimes, annoying! Of course i’m not saying you shouldn’t ask for small favours, we all do that from time to time. The point is; just don’t make it a habit, extreme and overboard! Time for me and you to change…

Because yes! Every chance is golden!

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By: Ibrahim Al Jabri

I often critique our societal norms and structure in respect to happiness,to try to find the source of our unhappiness. One of the greatest factors that correlate to societal norms and happiness is financial success, how we define it and it’s acceptable attainability.

It’s important to mention that we are beings dependant on a sense of level of satiability. Are we satisfied with our level of success ? If we’re not then we immediately retreat to depression and self doubt. In this regard we are deeply flawed.

In my country especially, there’s just not enough good jobs out there for the taking and it creates a deeply competitive market that capitalizes on niche qualifications. This creates a rush to degree courses and specializations on  markets that can sustain our need of financial success,our need to one day flaunt it.

Now personally I did look at job markets before choosing my degree , I had to do so much research on the monetary value of certain employment opportunities over others that I forgot what’s truly important. Passion. Am I interested in this field or am I chasing financial gains ?

It’s not my fault for being so crass in the way I choose , I was programmed that way by a failing market.

No one should have to choose passion over financial success. In a working economy all of our interests would warrant sufficient compensation, I would be able to survive just a writer we wouldn’t all be pigeonholed into being doctors and lawyers oh and let’s not forget pilots.

If I had a penny for every smart as a bag of hair medical student who’s parent is rich enough to pay for the novelty of a Dr tittle I’d be rich enough to survive on my writing alone.

Feel free ( or don’t ) to replace the above example with any degree course that isn’t in the arts as I have no qualms that are degree-specific.

The only reason I’m not in a liberal arts college ( besides that my country doesn’t have one ) studying literature and creative writing is the fact that I don’t want to be homeless. Its that simple. We give up our passions for realistic degrees that pay well and once we are financially stable we yearn for happiness.

I can only hope that there’s a niche market out there for writers without any college level training in writing.

My future happiness is banking on it.


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