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Photo Courtesy: http://media.istockphoto.com/

2016 has been like any other year; with it’s own ups and downs, new innovations, great changes, tragedies, successes, new habits both good and bad ones. As much as we are encouraged to embrace change and accept it, there are some things that we shouldn’t be okay with, that we should STOP doing as fast as the four letters can be pronounced and that each one of us should really reconsider before doing them again. Let us make 2017 a better year.

1. Let the journalists do their work: This is one of the things that really REALLY bothers and pisses me off honestly and it makes me sad too. We are in this era whereby everyone is a citizen journalist, everyone is a photographer. Of course there is a good side and great advantages of this but we are sooo misusing the privilege. Having people take photos and videos of tragic events, heart-breaking scenarios is soo not okay. It is NOT okay to take photos of someone’s bloody body at the accident scene, of someone’s burial, of someone who just committed suicide, of a total stranger having his private time somewhere and you decide the world should laugh with you on how they had worn their dress the wrong way or make-up done so badly or whatever embarrassing moment they are facing. Or even ‘better’, making a meme out of it. For heavens sake, please just don’t. We have journalists for a reason. And we go through four years of learning for a reason. We are taught ethics which apparently many don’t have.

Sometimes, I come across very devastating situations in which I know I could create a master piece story from yet I, as a journalist refrain from taking the pic or the video because I always remind myself that I am a human being before a journalist. And this is something we should all consider before we are so quick to pull out our phones. Ask yourself this question, if I were in that same situation, would I want someone to expose me to the world like that?! Would I want that to be done if it was my mother in the bad make up? Or if it was my dad lying on the ground dead? Would I want the world my dead body’s picture circulating before even my own family is notified of my death? For those who have ever read the biography of the Bang bang club of South Africa, or watched the movie, they can tell you how photo journalists at that time suffered from guilt and depression due to the heart-breaking scenes they had to capture. One committed suicide yet his photo of a vulture waiting for a hungry child to die brought him great fame. It was all guilt…but do we have any left? He was a journalist, that was his job, yet he couldn’t stand it. What of us of the all day, all night selfie era??

Don’t say I can’t be in that situation. I can’t commit suicide. I can’t do bad make-up. I can’t I can’t…but you may do something way worse and trust me, you wouldn’t even want to admit it to your own self let alone the whole world knowing about it. We need to start acting like human beings with brains and with a heart. Act HUMAN!

2. Stop putting yourself down: Stop waiting for a miracle to happen to bring you out of your misery. You need to believe in yourself, believe that you have a purpose in this life. That you do make a difference. It doesn’t have to be world wide difference. You don’t have to be mother Theresa or Nelson Mandela for you to know that you are making a difference. You are. Because you make someone in your life happy. Because you help your friends in their difficult times. Because you love your family and they love you back. You are making a difference just by your existence. So don’t allow rain drops look like a storm. Don’t create problems that don’t exist. Don’t overthink. Just believe. Have faith. Love and love again. Be kind and never let yourself down. Remember, you are amazing! πŸ™‚

3. Staying low key is important. It is as important as you taking your medicine on time. I personally spend a lot of time on social media because that is where all my work is but if there is anything that I learnt is; learn to separate your personal life from social media. Stop worshiping the internet. Stop giving out too many details about your life. It is okay to let your friends know when you are happy and when you are sad or when you are having a nice time somewhere. Just don’t over-do it. There are many vultures out there waiting for you to trip or maybe even your downfall. You upload your every single movement; from hotel to hotel. From outing to outing. From boyfriend to boyfriend. From meal to meal. Do you believe that people actually are happy for you just because they clicked ‘like’? or because the comments got to 100 plus? Think about it. How many are actually your friends; REAL friends? Few I am sure. What then becomes of the rest who have so much information about you to write your biography yet you are actually strangers? Doesn’t it ever scare you that you have nothing left in your life that is private and unknown to the world? Be a little bit mysterious. It has it’s own beauty.

4. Regard depression seriously. It’s high time we stopped mocking people undergoing depression. They are not attention seekers. They are not drama queens and kings. They are not weak. They are just too overwhelmed with their lives. They just need your help, your advice, your support. We need to stop telling on them like they are being delicate babies. That they are not strong enough. We need to stop pushing them away because depression is an illness of the heart just as cancer is to the body. It is real. It is deadly. It is suicidal. We shouldn’t wait until someone has harmed themselves is when we say, ‘He told me how he had suicide thoughts many times. I thought he was joking…’ Sweet heart there is no jokes on depression issues. When your friend/family/close person comes to you then give them your time, your love, your prayers and assist them in discovering God and having faith in Him and His plans.

5. New beginnings: I believe in new beginnings. I believe in making changes, meeting new people and making new discoveries. I believe in better days and happy moments. But I also believe that none of these are tied to a new year. Every new year we want to make resolutions, we want a fresh start, we want the new beginnings. Yet 1st of January is not any different with 31st December or 20th August or 23rd of March. It is a day like any other. It doesn’t come with a miracle from Santa nor does it hide any surprises. It is all but our own perception of it. The resolutions we make each year, we rarely ever fulfill them. We just make them because everyone is making their resolutions. But it should never be so. Yes I believe in making goals and what better time to make them than on a new year? Yes that is fine. I also do have my resolutions and goals each year. But that doesn’t mean you have to wait until next new year for you to make the necessary changes in your life? How are you even sure you will live to the next 1st January?

Please stop complaining that it has been a terrible year, every single year! We hear the same words on and on and on, year after year. So when are you ever going to appreciate the good things that happened in the 12 months phase? Stop being a negative person. Appreciate good things when they come and be patient during tough times. And remember, change can be done any time any day even if it at midnight of a very stormy night. It’s all in your brain. You can start your new beginning right now, right this second. Who is going to stop you? Every day is a beautiful day; beautiful enough to be a fresh start πŸ˜‰

It has been a year of it’s own. Let’s hope and pray that 2017 will be a more peaceful year for the whole world, a better year for us all, a year with more love and happiness than any other. May we all live to have our new beginnings and achieve our goals. Ameen πŸ™‚

Photo Courtesy: Butterfly.4.Weddings (http://www.imgrum.net/)

There are 8 kinds of women you almost never miss in a Swahili/Mombasa wedding:

1. The epitome of beauty: The most beautiful lady in the room. You would almost confuse her to be the bride. She is gorgeous and she knows it. Make-up done perfectly with a Cinderella gown that makes her the princess of the night. She walks gracefully, head held high, appears in the dance floor, interact and doesn’t miss out in the photos.

2. Selfieeee: You will never miss a selfie freak. Always taking photos from the moment they step at the hall door, to when they are walking, seated, dancing, eating, all poses you can think off. She could have 50 photos of just a single evening.

3. Make-up gone soo wrong: The kind of lady who makes you question whether you are too ignorant about make-up or she really looks the way you see her. You question her brain, her mirror, her friends, her family, the entire humanity who walked right by her and never said a word. Not even, “honey, I think some water on your face will do you good.”?!!

4. Always the dancer: She is the great dancer. She knows her moves well and all songs can be danced even the one you would just sit and have your hand hold your chin? Yeah, that song too. She can dance it. So of course, you never miss her being in the dance floor.

5. Fashion police: The keen eyes scrutinizing what everyone is wearing, what colour, which jewelry, what they should have done differently and what would match best with what. Plus they never miss someone to discuss the fashion NO-NO’s with at the wedding.

6. Family-tree narrator: This is the historian. “See the lady in blue? she is the daughter of the woman in green. The woman in green is the step-cousin to your late mother. And your late mother had a great step-grandmother; she is the old lady talking to the young lady. The young lady is your step aunt” bla bla bla… They know most people in the wedding. They can connect the dots of family lineage back to your ancestors.

7. God! I_AM_BORED woman: She is mostly at the event because she has no choice. She is just staring at people, rarely interacting at all, appreciates the food being served, has a faint smile on her face and the moment the bride sits on the stage, she is gone!

8.The psycho kind of writer ME:The moment she takes a seat, she starts eating. She wants to get done with it already and forget about food. Next she is in pauses between chronic texting syndrome and staring at people silently like a serial killer and psychopath studying her victims. She looks at people like story materials and study expressions, impressions, abbreviations you name it πŸ˜€ She stares at the corner of the eyes of the bride trying to find tears, study body language and think of all the story ideas she can get from one event. There is no selfie taken at all because she is the same way you’d see her on the street buying tomatoes. She can’t interact much because hey! ‘I am just from greeting someone across the hall. I can’t dare do that again. Too much attention.’ She is always looking around just in case she sees a familiar face or an old friend. Not that she will walk to go say hi, rather she’ll just wave and plaster a big smile like, ‘if only you were closer i’d give you a hug.’ You know, Mombasa weddings are partly re-unions, everyone knows everyone sorta thing. She looks confused and lost. All people are going to take photos with the bride she is still seated at the far end row alone with empty seats beside and around her. She is trying to dissect the song lines and read between the lines and sometimes question the sanity of the singers with very cheesy lines. She waits until the bride is walking right beside her so that she can hug her and congratulate her. Then hurrah! ‘I think I just got something to write about from this.’ πŸ˜€ Okay I know I am bizarre and weird but at least you got something to read today! πŸ˜‰ Have a blessed weekend lovely people πŸ˜€

OUR LIVES IN A SNAP

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

 

Me-Snap

Food-Snap

Location-Snap

Spouse-Snap

Friends-Snap

Shoes-Snap

Gift-Snap

Family Outing- Snap

Posted Facebook- Check

Posted Instagram- Check

Posted Snapchat- Check

Posted Twitter- Check

Posted Whatsapp- Check

We are all living in the technology frenzy and all we have are camera clicks everywhere we go. With the coming of the selfies, oh my, people couldn’t get busier. The reality is that we have lost the actual essence of taking photos and videos. We no longer buy shoes because we need them, we no longer even enjoy the food that we really like. We no longer really cherish the moments we live because we are all focused on taking photos and posting them on social media so that the world can see what we ate, what we wore, what we did. And the real value of these moments all go to waste because as soon as the photos are deleted from our gallery then that’s the end of it.

So picture this scenario.Here we are, in a very beautiful place, having wonderful food with the people we love most but what are we doing? The first thing we do is take photos of the food, of the place, of you all; but while we are busy doing all this, we forget the actual essence of our outing or picnic or whatever the occasion is. We are now cherishing the photos more than the real value of the photo or the whole event.We don’t even remember the conversations we have because we are only half listening; everyone busy taking snaps to show off to the world.

Technology has made us in a daze. We are slowly selling our entire lives to technology and before we realize it, our lives would be nothing more but a snap. All our moments will mean nothing to us because we didn’t really participate in creating a memory.

As we grow old, maybe at one time when you are at your 80’s you will be looking at your phone, your gallery full of photos that you took over time but they end up to be just photos. Photos that don’t have any value to you; meaningless snaps, because you were busy snapping instead of living the actual moment.

Live the moment. It doesn’t come twice. Don’t let the snap dictate your life!

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