Author

Abdulqadir Mahmoud


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By: Abdulqadir Mahmoud via http://selfcharge.blogspot.co.ke/

Photo Courtesy: Pexels

 

I used to believe in love.

Now, am not so sure.

Recording…

“It’s been uumm…it’s been a while since I talked to anyone…even a longer while since everyone disappeared…The last person I remember talking to was uuh, was a traveler. He was part of a small group I stumbled upon. He had to leave. The others followed soon after. Something about surviving this wave. Kinda like what am trying to do right now, with all this, in all this. And frankly I don’t know if am doing a good enough job, you know… It’s been so long ever since; I’ve lost track of time. It’s been so long I think I might be losing it, I mean, what’s real, anymore? I can barely tell what’s right from wrong, whether to feel or numb…I don’t know when I am myself anymore, like falling in and out of consciousness but with life, and what happens in it. Everything’s a blur now. Time is but a word, a reason, an excuse for me to say day, night, because none of them make sense to me now; a mere black or white as life passes by, numb, soundless. And every day I watch myself slowly fade, some part of me, of who I am, disintegrating like the floating dust as it mingles with the air, dispersing, disappearing, leaving me emptier with every dawn of day. Maybe it wants to help. Maybe it has hope of bringing them back. Maybe, just maybe, this part of me believes…Maybe. I do not know, of it, of me, I do not know.

We used to be so close my friends and I, hanging out, having fun, forgetting the world in those moments as we made our own, and just for those split precious moments, we lived in it…I remember we used to have these inside jokes that whenever we were in class, or a room and we would hear them, we’d look for each other among the crowds and just giggle or laugh when our eyes met, and we would savor that moment because it was just us who knew what they meant, in our little small world…It was perfect, until that day when the advert aired.

I wasn’t interested at first. It was like one of those promos you’d see on billboards and newspapers when going back home or surfing the analogue way (1). Promos like those never stuck around for long. They’d usually be replaced by some other advert for towels and children all in one picture, probably for a super market promo. But this one, this one never left. Its image grew on us as time went by. We’d even joke around with its catch phrase. ‘Let’s Change together’, it said. Within no time it was everywhere. Kids, teenagers, adults, everyone wanted one. It became the new toy, the new Black, the smart choice….They said it had the ability to transform the world…yeah, for once the adverts actually were true to their word. But no one knew how much…

We all had heard about how my neighbor’s aunt used this technology to do incredible things, how she’d make an interaction in a split second that normally would take days or even weeks to make. It was unbelievable. It was amazing. It was impossible, she said. And now it was our turn to rock the new Black. With a few mummers, requests and a lot of aunties, we finally got ours. Everyone was excited for the other. We had all these new techs in our hands, I mean, we were living the dream. The cool kids, you now. It was awesome; the attention, the wonder in others, the super workload lifting, we could use it to do almost everything, all we had to do was a few taps and swipes of the finger and, voila…we were transforming the world,our world…Then it all begun….

I couldn’t figure why I felt lost, at first. Why my life felt like an act, a pretense, a routine; planned and laid out for me to follow. I couldn’t understand what was it I liked in humor, in heart, in taste, in others. I couldn’t remember what deserved to be felt, be understood, what was okay or absurd, what needed my attention and what could wait. I had no idea of how to feel anymore, how to judge, when to judge, who to judge, should I be judged? I could feel myself scare. I could feel the confusion, the anger, the rage, the breath living my lungs without flowing back in. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t understand. My friends seemed fine. They were fine. Why wasn’t I? What was happening to me? Why am I feeling all this…this darkness…this rage? Why was I in so much pain? Bleeding….weeping….

Then I saw.

Everyone was leaving. Up and leaving. Leaving everything behind. Leaving their families behind. Just like that. They told me to come with them. They told me People were coming. They told me the smart people, the uh, the scientists had abandoned them. They told me Humans were dying. Dying a cold death in Life. Dying to be reborn into People, into a specie of no depth, of no emotion, no lives; into a specie of pretense, of confusion, of rage; into a specie of loneliness…and their Humanity, their Humanity dies with them. They told me to run, for the technology  the scientists granted upon us has unleashed a pandemic so deadly it corrupted their Norm, our Norm, and we Humans are paying for it, paying for it with our lives, our selves, our souls…we Humans are paying for it with our essence…with our Humanity…and being turned into monsters, into slaves of a corrupted Norm, a whole book of it as we slowly, but surely, sell our souls to it so my boy, Run! Run and save yourself! Because we all know, there is nothing anyone of us, can do for the other. Run!

You can imagine how shocked I was. I didn’t believe them because no, my friends were alright. No, my friends seemed fine so it can’t be true…I screamed in their faces, begged for their attention, tried for their care; but they were gone. It was too late for them…I was too late for them…and now,I was alone…now I am alone…And you know what is the most painful thing of all? Watching them fade away whilst their eyes cry for help, until they don’t.

One might think this place am in is a ghost town. Well it’s not. It’s full of People who follow what they are told to be right, believe what they are told to be true. It is filled with People who laugh by cue, live by routine; a planned schedule of day and night. This place is filled with People who call life by what they are given and like in it what they are told is likeable, hate what they are told to, no choices, no questions. This is indeed a ghost town; one bereaved of Humans, and filled with People. This is why I am here right now, talking to this screen. Hoping. Hoping that this will reach someone; reach anyone…Hoping that maybe they aren’t too far gone…Hoping that their eyes open their minds and free their bodies…hoping….hoping….

And now, here I am. Alone. Fading away, like them. Sometimes I wish I had their fate. Not ideal really, I know, but still free from all this, the pain, the sorrow, the helplessness…the loneliness…I don’t think I’ll last for long after this anyways, because, without any other Human around, I’m slowly giving up hope…giving in to the silence. There was a time I used to believe in friendship, in the unbreakable bond; in people…Before all this, I used to believe in Love.

Now, am not so sure….”

STOP.

Key

1. Reading the Newspapers.

By: Abdulqadir Mahmoud via http://selfcharge.blogspot.co.ke/

Photo Courtesy: Daily Mail

 
I used to believe in love.

Now, am not so sure.

After a tale like that, you’d want to hitch a home and get married ASAP. I know I did. So calm your nerves and take a few, breathe, you’re going to need it.

One word, Society.

This, simply put, is a realm where people and humans cross each other’s paths. This realm has some rules, which are said to have been conjured from the invisible Book of Norm. They are responsible for guarding and guiding these creatures with their powers of Thought Action to protect these paths and their takers. But something’s gone terribly wrong…And no one is aware of this to know it…

With the introduction of technology in to this realm, the creatures started showing rapid interaction progressions. What they could do in a weeks’ time, they did in an hour. It was amazing. It was impossible. But something happened after a while of this exposure. The creatures, the humans, they started evolving. As more records of interaction were continuously broken, more and more humans started to evolve gradually turning in to a new unknown species…turning into People.

It was not long before this new species of humans started reporting cases of memory loss, depleted senses, irregular tendencies and even personality erosion and finally, they stop reporting…just, Silence. When they were followed up, they just sat there, staring, with no expression on their faces, no emotion, their eyes empty with clouds of sadness…they had lost who they were…they were simply, gone…

The other Humans quickly started taking action to this new phenomenon. Research was launched to analyze this evolution, quarantines put up, drills taught to subdue this new infection. Panic, there was panic, worry, anxiety, depression…everything was going haywire because no matter what they did, it never stopped…just kept spreading, like light moving through the medium-less space, evolving the humans, one by one, into nothingness…into people.

The whole human species was now heading to its doom. Some decided to abandon ship and live in desert islands. Some just waited for the day they would turn into one of them, helplessly, as they watch their evolved versions walk around aimlessly, bumping into anyone and everyone they met within this realm, tangling their paths with theirs, spreading the contraction… Wait, their paths, that’s it! Alas, for they were looking in the wrong direction the whole time.

They finally figured out that what was spreading the contraction wasn’t the people, but their paths. Somehow this exposure to technology found a way to corrupt the rules in the invisible Book of Norm. And with a corrupt guiding and guarding system of interaction, the Thought Action powers of the rules corrupted every other interaction and thus, the contraction spread onto the humans, uninterrupted, without them even knowing.

They had done it. They had finally figured out what was happening. They had finally found out what was wrong. Everything will be okay, we made it, we’ll be fine, we can put an end to this.

Those were the last words they said. Nothing was ever heard from them thereafter. And now, no one knows where they went, where they are. The humans disappeared. They were gone.

The news spread of their success and the new species, People, they reacted. They were furious. Their faces were transformed into anger. Their mouths spoke words not heard of. Their bodies tensed in protection, in defense, guarding their attachment…they were now monsters. But their eyes, their eyes never changed… Empty. Sad. Almost as if they cried for help. Yes, they cried for help. They had no control of who they were anymore. They were helpless….Who is going to save them?

Where is everyone?

Is there anyone out there?

Am all alone…

Can you help me?

Anyone?

Please!

Stop staring and say something!

Please…

Am all alone…

Please…

Please…..

One word, Society.

This, simply put, is a realm where people and humans cross each other’s paths. This realm has some rules, which are said to have been conjured from the invisible Book of Norm. They are responsible for guarding and guiding these creatures with their powers of Thought Action to protect these paths and their takers. But something’s gone terribly wrong…And no one is aware of this to know it…

Stay tuned for part 3…

via http://selfcharge.blogspot.co.ke

I used to believe in Love.

Now, am not so sure.

All I could think of when I heard the word was frankly something out of the Notebook, The fault in our stars or more relatable, the Vow. But what I didn’t consider was that Love doesn’t end there; with two partners and a life ahead of them; but also extends to partners we hold close to our hearts, those who we loosen up around and get awkward and downright mandazi (1) with them, those whom our love touch to care for and stand by, preferable over all others… you guessed it, Friends.

I’ve had my fair share of stories and experiences from others to amp the notion of ‘there is no such thing as “best friends”’ so for now am going to go with it. So that squad you’re willing to spend your quality time with, there is a connection that keeps you together and makes you prefer their company over anyone else’s. This connection exists regardless of there being any partner(s) involved or not; it’s a natural thing. There’s a clear line between a friend and an intimate munchkin pumpkin honey sweetie teddy bear cutie pie; you get my point. So you know who to go to when a little drama crosses your way. But you know, the thing about friendships, whether besties or accomplices, there is always the alpha of the group. The one whose needs comes first and whose likes are cherished to overrule that of the other(s). If you’ve never heard of this then ask yourself one question, would you go through all the trouble your friend(s) has gone through, favors done for you all to put a smile on their face?

If you don’t feel any entitlement to do all of them because hey, it was from their own free will, right? Yeah, know that you are the Alpha of that squad. If you’d do it all over again cause, come on, this is my squad you’re talking about here, well, am letting you know that your friend(s)’ amusement supercharges you to bend backwards and do things not less than amazing to achieve it. Let me rephrase, you’ll always be second priority. I know, unbelievable. But come to think about it….not really. I mean, do you even remember what you’d like to eat when you are in a restaurant, or is it cause your friend(s) also liked it at one point?
Please, don’t let me speak for you. Though am sure you know who you are between the two by now. As long as your friend(s) help(s) you forget about your struggles and keep(s) you smiling, it’s all good…right? #Food_for_thought

Hey, it’s okay. It’s simply how us humans were made. It’s totally normal for us to “serve” anyone we deem more awesome than ourselves, basic human psychology. No sweat. Except,  the Prophet aleyhi swalaatu wa salaam replied as such when he was asked who his best friend is, and he said, ‘Aisha’ (ra), who was her wife, and after being asked who followed, he added, ‘ Her father’, who was Abubakar (ra), referring him also from his wife. Now this is no special answer in the norm. But what’s fascinating about this reply is that Abubakar (ra), was the man who he travelled with after leaving his home town to another one, where they faced unlimited dangers and he even got stung by a scorpion for him. He was the man that accepted his message without a single ounce of hesitation when everyone around him scorned it. He was the man that believed the Prophet’s journey to the heavens and back in one night with no need of any proof. Scratch that, Abubakar (ra) was a very good friend of the prophet aleyhi salaam even before he became a prophet, and let’s not get into the number of battles he fought beside the prophet, upon him be peace. So what’s up? I mean, Bro, after all that?

What is up, is that even though their friendship was strong, Abubakar (ra) only met with him when they met, you know, see you when you see me. But his wife Aisha (ra), oh she met with him all the other times; not it be at his highest or lowest, happiest or saddest, be or not be. I mean she was inside his life just as deeply as he was in hers. See, the thing about marriage is that it takes you from the comforts of your house and privacy and puts you smack in the middle of someone else’s. Your personal space is not personal anymore, your schedule isn’t yours anymore, you have to worry about more than just you; cause you were just fine with how you were….In totality, you give up your previous life for this strange new one, with someone strange, all cooped up in a strange new space…Duude…But with time, with time a friendship brews. You start knowing each other, understanding, adapting, enduring…the displeasure, dislikes, repulsion of your opposite views slowly disintegrates as you battle life on each other’s side, standing by one another and being there for each other…It’s you Vs. the world, and alas, a bond more rigid than Love itself and its totality… a bond forged from the roots of Endurance, the stem of Friendship and the branches of Love… a bond soo unique the most richest of languages gave it its own name, Al Mawaddah(2), unbreakable…Subhanallah, praise be to the Most High.

Now you understand the Prophet aleyhi salaam’s answer, upon him be peace…Now you understand why he chose his wife over his life-long friend…Now you understand why she was his best friend…

Fascinated much?

This is the true meaning of friendship. Knowing each other to the core and having to deal, even if you don’t want to. And for this reason, is why, in this world of now, any other friendship will never be as equal sided, just like how 1400 years ago, a friendship that meant dying for one another could not match that of a wife, and her husband.

That bond, that is why I believed in love. I cannot still comprehend the intensity of the connection.

So, why halter in its belief now? I mean, what happened?

Stay tuned for Part 2 to find out…

Key
1. Used to mean crazy stuff
2. Affection, love, friendliness
3. (ra) : May Allah be pleased with him/her