Creative Non-Fiction – Page 13

Creative Non-Fiction

JUDGEMENT VS JUSTIFICATION

By Lubnah Abdulhalim November 28, 2015

How many times have you said to someone else, ‘don’t judge me’ or heard it from someone else perhaps? With no doubt this statement is increasingly becoming our biggest yet most lame excuse for everything. Are you being judged too much? Naah. Are you over justifying yourself? YES!

With the coming of technology and the evolution of the world, people have somehow become sensitive over what they say about or comment to someone about their behaviour or actions, which to some extent is not bad. As the common saying goes, ‘don’t judge others when you don’t know their journey,’ or that everyone should mind their own business. We are actually advised to give people the benefit of doubt as many times as possible and try to understand their journey rather than automatically criticize what they do or say.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a big supporter of giving benefit of doubts, giving people a million other chances and trying to give them space they need but have you noticed how we are increasingly letting ourselves drown in this lame excuse of ‘don’t judge me?’

It’s very important that first people realize that there is a difference between judging someone and correcting them. When I tell you you should reduce on swearing it just means you should reduce on the swearing. Period. There is NO judgement in any way in that statement. But when I start saying that you are good at nothing other than swearing and you are just an evil person who should go straight to hell then yes, I am judging you. Maybe we should learn to differentiate the good intentioned correction from the ill judgement so that we don’t unnecessarily over-use the ‘don’t judge me’ statement. But now everyone is obsessed with this statement which actually in other words means, ‘I very well know that I am doing wrong but just shut up because this is my life.’

People usually correct others only for either of these three reasons. One is that they really care about you and want the best for you. Second is that your actions or words either irritate, bother or annoy them and lastly, they correct you to criticize you which may end up being counted as a judgement. I’ll give this simple example: You have always been a good person but just this one day you are caught stealing; something that you don’t usually do..

Person number one: I really know you had a crucial matter that needed urgent attention and that’s why you stole…but nonetheless, stealing is still wrong, whatever the reason. Please next time when you need any assistance do come to me or so and so and we will help you …just don’t do it again please because we all know you are not a thief.

Person number two: Listen here bro, I know you are my friend but I was really pissed when I knew that you stole from me. Don’t expect me to forgive you any time soon not unless you prove to me that this will never happen again.

Person number three: Hey thief, so what are you planning to steal this time? I always knew you looked like one and now you just proved me right.

In such a scenario, you have no right to say to person number one and two that they are judging you except for the third individual. However, many would still say ‘mind your own business.’ ‘don’t interfere with what doesn’t concern you’ etcetera etcetera etcetera but maybe you should know that whatever you do actually does affect the people around you even if it is indirectly. So please drop the ‘don’t judge me because only God is supposed to judge me,’ and instead accept the truth as it is. Accept positive criticism and most importantly accept that you NEED to be corrected. And not just you, everyone needs to be corrected, guided and shown the way when we are lost.

Maybe you should also realize that someone else in this world is probably facing a much greater problem than yours yet they still don’t go for evil ways to cope up with life. So this kind of justification is most of the times inappropriate. We all do mistakes and most of the times none of us wants to be seen in the wrong but it’s just human so please accept your own baggage of mistakes and instead of justifying yourself too much try and swallow your pride and change your ways. And when you feel no one has the right to correct you then please use the right words like, ‘don’t correct me’ instead of ‘don’t judge me.’ Because you are not being judged, you are just over justifying your own mistakes.

Creative Non-Fiction

THE ‘OKAY PEOPLE’ IN YOUR LIFE

By Lubnah Abdulhalim September 22, 2015

THE ‘OKAY PEOPLE’ IN YOUR LIFE

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

In life you will meet people who will be different from you; people with different perspectives of life, different thoughts, different lifestyles, different definitions of happiness and so much more. Not everyone is going to agree with you. Every person has their own journey so learn to respect the differences between you two. They don’t have to be your enemies nor do you have to befriend them by force, just be okay with them in such a way that you are mature enough to respect the differences between you.

Whereas someone may declare you to be bossy someone else will just call the same thing as good leadership skills. Someone may declare you to be mean; another would call it a tough personality. Someone may call you a cry baby while someone would just call it as sensitivity. Someone may call you foolish while someone else would just see it as humbleness from you. Someone may declare you to have arrogance while to someone else that may as well be your smartness in disguise.

When a person is able to understand your pattern; your way of talking, your way of asking, your way of laughing, your language, your perception of issues and viewpoints without having to justify yourself, then those are the people to hold close in your life; because majority of the rest of the people you will come across in your life will always have the first negative instinct on everything that you do. Many will critique your work, your words and your actions. Many will twist all your positive intentions to be horrible ones. Many will judge you in odd ways but you have to accept the reality of it; that you will meet more and more such people. No need to hold a grudge against the person who doesn’t understand you for what you really are. No need to have hatred for those who hold twisted judgments of you. It happens, not only to you, but to everyone. But if you want to have eternal peace then learn to honestly forgive the differences between you and the other person/s because sometimes, it is not their fault that they don’t really get you. It could be their background or lifestyle or their environment that doesn’t allow them to see life the way you do. So do not hate; embrace the differences instead and make them your ‘okay people’. You never know because sometimes, making peace with such people may give you both the space to study and understand other viewpoints from each other. You may be surprised to know that you could also learn a lot from your ‘okay people’ more than the people you freely bond with.

Life isn’t about finding the right people always but also learning to embrace the other people whom we don’t agree with by your differences. Respect your different viewpoints and learn to accept that not everyone will be on your side. You may not really love them and sometimes not even like them, but respect between you brings your relationship with them to a whole different level. Sometimes all you need is those two important things; respect and time and maybe you will also be able to accept your ‘okay people’ into your lives permanently. So give it time and appreciate all kind of people in your life. That is the way to find peace.

Creative Non-Fiction

THE PAIN OF BETRAYAL

By Lubnah Abdulhalim September 7, 2015

THE PAIN OF BETRAYAL

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

I remember when I was thirteen years old, my closest friend decided to replace me as her best friend with another girl. I was apparently so hurt at that and wrote her a two paged letter filled with so much bitterness and was listing down all the sacrifices I did for her sake and the way she didn’t appreciate. As i was writing the letter, my mother appeared and saw it. she read it through and gasped with astonishment, ‘you carry all this load in your heart?!’ and i cant forget how much she scolded me for concentrating on friendship that much instead of my studies as i was a candidate by then. All in all, my point is not at how my mother scolded me or what happened after that. Many years later now, I look back at that situation and wish that the only betrayal that could ever exist was like that one whereby an innocent thirteen year old is filled with bitterness because her best friend replaced her.

As someone once said, ‘every man faces seven enemies in his lifetime; sickness, hunger, betrayal, envy, greed, old age and finally death.

As I grew up, I realized how naïve I was and that the world is actually like a battle field. so many wolves ready to attack you just the moment you trip. The saddest thing about betrayal though is that it never comes from your enemies, it comes from the people you loved the most.

As John Le Carre said ‘love is whatever you can still betray. Betrayal can only happen if you love.’ No one could ever dispute this fact that betrayal only happens when you love, because you trusted in the first place. Of course you wouldn’t trust your enemy right? therefore, betrayal never happens with your enemies, it only happens with your loved ones.

We live in a world where you can’t really trust anyone completely. It takes years to build trust and yet, just a few seconds to break it. We live in a world whereby you can’t even trust to leave your wife alone for some few hours, in the fear that another man, probably could be even your neighbour, takes over your place just the moment you leave.

Betrayal has led to so much pain. They say time heals all wounds but they forget that the scar will forever be there. People may forgive but will never forget the deep pain they felt and of course, nothing will ever be the same again.

Sometimes, a mother betrays her child. One would wonder how? but haven’t we seen all those many children appearing on our televisions, with deep cuts, burns, mutilated body parts just because of a small mistake they did? Yes, she betrayed her child. He trusted her, he knew she would never want any harm for him, he knew she would protect her and what did she do instead? she was the one holding the knife, the one holding the flame ready to burn, the one holding a panga ready to chop…the one who put the poison in his food. Yes, that is betrayal. When a father rapes his own daughter and maybe, she even gets pregnant and the girl lives the rest of her life being haunted. Life will never be the same again for her.

Betrayal is when we all put our trust and hope in that leader. As we die with hunger and thirst, we still had the energy to stand up and have faith that change will come with this leader. It is that kind of hope that never dies and we all vote for him, thinking we would never be hungry and thirsty again. But alas! greed is all he ever had.

Betrayal is when you love someone so deeply and just suddenly, they shatter all your dreams into small irreplaceable pieces of glass. Even picking up the pieces will cut you once again so you let them right there with the undying hope that they would realize what damage they caused and maybe…just maybe come back.

Betrayal doesn’t only break your heart, but also darkens your soul. You will never forget the pain and many have changed due to that kind of pain.

Trust is like a mirror, once broken, you may try to repair it but no matter what you will always still see the cracks. So be very careful on whom you trust and value the people who trust you and keep up to their expectations. Don’t disappoint them for giving you the most valuable thing they can ever offer; TRUST!

You are not a fool that you trusted, that you loved, that you had faith…they are the fools for lying to someone who trusted them. So forget what hurt you but never forget what it taught you!

Creative Non-Fiction

NOTHING PLEASES THE WORLD ANYWAY

By Lubnah Abdulhalim September 6, 2015

NOTHING PLEASES THE WORLD ANYWAY

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

Truly, human beings are the most complex of creatures and each one of us has a different personality from the other. In this life whatever you are, however you are, there must be some people somewhere who will hate you, disagree with you or simply not appreciate you for what you are. As Dita Vee said, ‘You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches.’

When you work hard, you are too serious. When you don’t, you are a joker. When you eat, you are greedy. When you don’t, you are a freak. When you read, you are a nerd. When you don’t, you are stupid. You let someone into your life, you are too easy. When you don’t, you’re up too tight. When you tell a secret, you are an attention seeker, when you don’t you are still an attention seeker. You wear make up, you’re a slag. When you don’t, you are old fashioned. When you sleep around, you are a slut. When you don’t, you are frigid. When you cry, you are a cry baby, when you don’t, you are cold hearted. When you wear provokingly, you are an attention seeker. When you wear decent, you are a pretender. When there is war, the world condemns it. When there is peace, the leaders destroy it.

The list could go on and on without ending but all in all, we may as well have to realize that every action we take should have a purpose that to us, is good…the rest of the world doesn’t really matter. Just as people like Hitler have so many haters in the world, there are some people who still adore what the man was. Just the same way, maybe someone somewhere, doesn’t really like what Nelson Mandela stood up for. But that is just life. When you are bad, you are too bad. When you are good, you are way too good to be true. When people don’t know what is happening in your life, they speculate. When you suddenly start becoming rich, they suspect you are either involved with illuminati or you are a corrupt individual. They will always suspect you for something. When they think they know about you, they fabricate. All kind of rumours will spread about you. If it is about that new Mercedes that you bought, stories will go round on what you had to do to get it. Maybe steal some money, maybe oppress someone, and maybe lend from someone etcetera. And when they really know about you, how much you worked to get where you are they will hate you.

When you are sweet, they think you are foolish. They will take advantage of you and step on you like the door mat. When you are firm and strong, they say you are heartless. Even being pretty becomes a crime. They’ll hate you for being pretty. And yet still, they will also hate you when you are not pretty. You barely have any friends at all, why; because you are way too ugly for their company. People will hate you for what you lack. You lack intellect? You lack wealth? You lack good looks? You are not of my standard. And yet still, when you have got everything that everyone wishes for, they’ll still hate you; for having what they don’t.

People who speak out their minds usually have the most haters because they don’t try to fit in with everybody else. The bad news is you can never fit in with everyone. That’s just impossible. The good news is the great never do. So stop the struggle of trying to make people like you. Fact is you can’t please the world. Nothing does anyway.

However much you try, there will always be people who don’t like you; the way you look, the way you talk, the way you dress, the way you speak out your mind, the way you mingle with them, the things you believe in, your intellect, the things you read and listen to. In the end of the day, it is up to you whether you will let people ruin your day and control your actions towards them or whether you will stand up for yourself and be whatever you want to be without fearing or caring what people will really think about you. Do what you think is right to you, do good to your ability and never think twice about doing it more and more. You are not in this world to please anyone apart from God. There will always be people who won’t appreciate your nature, your struggles, dreams and ambitions but for sure, there won’t miss a person who will. So just be a nice person and true to yourself. That’s what really matters.

Creative Non-Fiction

OUR LIVES IN A SNAP

By Lubnah Abdulhalim September 2, 2015

OUR LIVES IN A SNAP

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

Me-Snap

Food-Snap

Location-Snap

Spouse-Snap

Friends-Snap

Shoes-Snap

Gift-Snap

Family Outing- Snap

Posted Facebook- Check

Posted Instagram- Check

Posted Snapchat- Check

Posted Twitter- Check

Posted Whatsapp- Check

We are all living in the technology frenzy and all we have are camera clicks everywhere we go. With the coming of the selfies, oh my, people couldn’t get busier. The reality is that we have lost the actual essence of taking photos and videos. We no longer buy shoes because we need them, we no longer even enjoy the food that we really like. We no longer really cherish the moments we live because we are all focused on taking photos and posting them on social media so that the world can see what we ate, what we wore, what we did. And the real value of these moments all go to waste because as soon as the photos are deleted from our gallery then that’s the end of it.

So picture this scenario.Here we are, in a very beautiful place, having wonderful food with the people we love most but what are we doing? The first thing we do is take photos of the food, of the place, of you all; but while we are busy doing all this, we forget the actual essence of our outing or picnic or whatever the occasion is. We are now cherishing the photos more than the real value of the photo or the whole event.We don’t even remember the conversations we have because we are only half listening; everyone busy taking snaps to show off to the world.

Technology has made us in a daze. We are slowly selling our entire lives to technology and before we realize it, our lives would be nothing more but a snap. All our moments will mean nothing to us because we didn’t really participate in creating a memory.

As we grow old, maybe at one time when you are at your 80’s you will be looking at your phone, your gallery full of photos that you took over time but they end up to be just photos. Photos that don’t have any value to you; meaningless snaps, because you were busy snapping instead of living the actual moment.

Live the moment. It doesn’t come twice. Don’t let the snap dictate your life!

Creative Non-Fiction

I AM THE CHILD OF THE WORLD

By Lubnah Abdulhalim August 17, 2015

Photo Courtesy: http://www.camdennewjournal.com/

I am the child of the world

born with universal faith and hope

I am the child of Adam and Eve

doesn’t matter if my dad is Abdullah, Salman or Steve

I am the child of Syria

Today was a very sad day at school. It was the burial of my favourite teacher Miss fidya and the compound was covered with people from the media. I remember looking at her with so much admiration, as she talked with so much inspiration. Her smile glowed in the daylight like the moon in the darkest of nights.

‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’

‘I want to be like you; a teacher, a great leader’

She would then smile and pinch at my tiny nose. oh…this is surely more than a loss. The story went round between cries and low whispers. Of how her house was bombed and shattered to pieces. She died alongside her husband, daughters and nieces. The other teachers were slowly weeping too; not just for Miss Fidya but for all the teachers and students our school had lost too. And now I have changed my mind. I don’t want to be a teacher anymore. I don’t want to die like miss Fidya or the others. I don’t want to be a teacher anymore because I am scared to be one.

I am the child of Palestine

My favourite day is eid day because that is the day I get to play with fireworks together with my friends. We all wear good clothes and just after the prayers we go round with my friends buying all colourful fireworks for the night. We go to the park and swing and play the whole day. I love eid. It is a lovely day because I get to eat very tasty foods and snacks from relatives and neighbours. When the night comes, we gather with many other boys and light the fireworks. I love the fireworks; they give me the thrill and really excites me. But now eid is no longer eid. We no longer have eid in our neighbourhood. All we have is long scary days filled with the dust of bombs and explosives. Houses are broken down and we can no longer play outside. Fireworks frighten me nowadays. They remind me of the explosions I hear everyday. I don’t like fireworks anymore; they remind me of our grief, sadness and doom. They remind me that we can never light up the sky with beautiful colours and patterns anymore and instead we have huge infernos lighting up our skies. They remind me that we can never have eid anymore…

I am the child of Yemen

The child who keeps dreaming of honey and heaven. I have a neighbour who has a bakery just across my home. Every evening after school I go to the bakery and watch him make delicious cookies, bread and donuts. I enjoy seeing him put cream in a beautiful way on the cakes and he makes sure to put some on my face. Whenever I would ask him why he would say, ‘you are my birthday girl.’

‘But it is not my birthday.’

‘You are special and birthdays are special and cakes are special so you are my birthday girl.’

I would laugh loudly with amusement and I would ask him the question everyday just to hear him call me ”My birthday girl”. Then hunger striked our city just like the war brought down our city. The baker still made his delicious bread in silence and grief could be seen on his face. Everyone was hungry and he had to lower the prices so to help others. But soon afterwards, people and children came in multitides crying of their broken homes and hunger; he would give them bread for free. Soon there was no flour, sugar or oil to do anything. Hunger was slowly creeping to his door too. He was sad but I still went to him every evening; not to bake or make bread anymore but to sit with him outside his bakery where he sat with his radio listening closely. I would watch him in silence and wonder.

‘Why do you sit here amo?’

‘I am waiting to hear for the day that I can get my supplies of flour, sugar and oil again.’

‘But why not listen at home?’

‘Because closing down my bakery would mean I have given up hope. I don’t want to give

up hope. I have faith in Allah.’

That was enough to convince me, and we would sit in silence listening to what the radio had to announce. The baker no longer called me ‘my birthday girl’ coz he no longer had cream to put on my face nor a cake to offer. ..but I understood him and still wanted to sit by him. Soon, the war got worse, I couldn’t go to school nor could my mum allow me to even go to the baker again. It was too dangerous. It made me so sad; how would i learn how to bake anymore? I would roam around the house aimlessly; waiting for the worst like everyone else. As for the baker, I just watched him through our window as he sat outside his empty bakery listening to his radio. He still won’t give up. He still had faith…

I am the child of Iraq, Nigeria, Afghanistan and Kenya. I am the child of numerous other countries too. I am the child of the universe and the world. I am the child whose dreams are broken in the name of war and terror. I am the child who is deprived from happiness and peace. I am the child who wants to dream yet my soul is held captive in the nightmares of terror. I am the little bird wanting to fly, please don’t break my feeble wings. I am the child of not just a particular country, I am the child of every parent; the daughter of every mother and the son of every father. I am your child, please don’t let me die. I am the child speaking for all the children of the world, please let me grow. I am the child of the world.

Creative Non-Fiction

I WANNA BE A BREAKER

By Lubnah Abdulhalim May 16, 2015

I WANNA BE A BREAKER

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

Dreams crashing down

like the stars falling down

my thoughts make me drown

is it just my eyes

or is the grass also turning brown?

My heart makes me frown

I wanna be a breaker

not the kind that breaks hearts in a flicker

but the one who takes a break from the world.

Wings broken, with nothing to hold

alas, my heart will forever scold

of the soul that’s grown so cold

but hey, comes the inner whisper

an inner calling, an inner fixer

You can be a breaker

not the kind that destroys

Oh no..not even the kind that betrays

but the one that disappears

The one who deals with his fears.

Tears flowing

Under the moon, so glowing

is it just my soul

Even in daylight, that falls?

Oh yes I wanna be a breaker

not the kind that escapes

his challenges, his miseries

but the kind that closes on the world

to filter, to absorb.

I don’t wanna be a record-breaker

oh no…not even the one to initiate an ice breaker

I wanna take a break

a break from the screams of the universe

I wanna drown into the silence

oh yes I crave for that kind of presence

of nothing but my soul’s stillness

I wanna be immersed in the tranquility

of peace and spirituality

don’t you get it?

I just wanna be a breaker

the kind that takes a break from the world.

Creative Non-Fiction

SOCIAL MEDIA;UNVEILING OUR SHYNESS

By Lubnah Abdulhalim May 13, 2015

Photo Courtesy: http://cdn1.medicalnewstoday.com

You probably have heard of the old times or watched from the television shows or movies of the morals of the previous generations. Many of us may sit down and criticize those tough moral measures that were kept on our parents or grand parents or even great grand parents. We get amused at how parents those times were and laugh sarcastically, calling them ‘old fashioned’. Irony is, we are the ones to be pitied. We the current generation, the children of 21st Century, the children of the internet; we are the ones to be mocked and laughed at.

Though the internet and development of technology has brought to positive benefits in our lives, we fail to see how the social media has unveiled all our shyness and modesty in the name of freedom and choice. I mean, look at the old folks and listen to their love stories. How lovers had to meet in forests and hideouts, how the tale of their love would be top most secret, how touching a lady was such a big deal that one would be beaten up and stoned by the entire neighbourhood by the mere rumour that the boy is stalking a certain girl. Listen to the struggle a man had to go through before ever getting a girl or being accepted to marry him. Listen to how the girl in love would hide and bury all her emotions and never conceal to anyone that she met her lover today. Maybe that’s why the old folks know the meaning of true love and how to respect a woman, that’s because they know the struggle they had to go through with the girl’s parents before finally making her his better half. That’s because, they learnt it the hard way. Listen to how a girl would skillfully hide that she went out with friends without permission from her father; how she would be scared to death on what would happen to her if her father found out she went for a picnic with friends. A young boy smoking weed or hanging out with wrong friends would trick his parents for years giving them the idea he is being a responsible boy. I am for sure not supporting pretence but this just shows how as much as people were doing the wrong things, they were ashamed to tell it to their parents or to let the society see their misdoings openly.

So you see a girl coming out from home in her long dress looking very decent and simple and decides to stop over a friend’s place to change into tiny skimpy dress and for some makeup. This was ofcourse to remain top secret. Then lets have a look at how social media has brainwashed our minds. We were made to believe that we can be whatever we want to be, we can live as freely as we want and in fact, we can put a stop to these old folks interfering with our lives. That we shouldn’t be ashamed of anything. We were fed with images of singers, dancers and lovers and we were made to believe it’s totally OK to be half naked, to show every fine detail of our bodies, we were made to believe that love is random and intimacy before marriage is totally OK, I mean, we all have feelings right? It’s your utmost freedom whether or how you want to deal with those feelings. We are made not to care how painful it would be for our parents to know what we are doing, we are fed with the idea that we are adults and no one should control our actions. So now all we have in our social media is of all kinds of girls showing off their bossoms and bottoms, their hips and hair clips. We have the boys talking of their nights in gangs smoking shisha and weed and literally believing they are stars. And we have the lovers talking openly of how they spent their days and nights together. So where is our modesty here? Is there any shyness left? So who is to blame here? Whom are we going to blame that women are no longer respected and that the women no longer respect their spouses? Whom will we blame when our daughters tell us they are pregnant and our boys, HIV positive?

The social media has enslaved us. It has made us grow with ridiculous opinions and dreams. It has made us cheap. I am quite sure that atleast 50% of the social media users or even more would have a totally different character had they lived without social media. Many regard it as an eye opener to reality but it has not only opened our eyes, it blinded us thereafter. It has made us hypocrites of our own souls, it has drained all the moral teaching we ever had, while feeding us with stories of low life people who are made to be worlds’ stars. We are made to envy the bodies of actresses and models, we are made to be thrilled by their kind of life which is made up of only three things; Wealth and fame while they are keen to not mention their third characteristic of their private lives and that is depression. So girls go crazy over singers and take half naked pictures like them and imitate their hairstyles and fashion. The boys on the other hand fancy the nights out surrounded by women with smoke everywhere and ofcourse this scenario is so much beautified that our poor boys think of it like paradise.

If i may guess, approximately 70% of social media users would not be willing to show their parents their social media accounts. That’s because, many youth have so much that parents have totally no idea about. A poor mother somewhere thinks her daughter is a virgin yet she’s totally not. Another thinks that her daughter is very decent and is very proud to say that to the neighbour, and the neighbour just laughs sarcastically at this poor woman because the whole world knows her daughter is not a saint as she thinks. So we let the whole world know us; what we wear, whom we love, where we go, which part of my face I have a pimple and where I got a dimple, the whole world knows that I spent the night at a boy’s house while my dear parents think their ‘very good daughter’ is at a friend’s place studying. The whole world knows; except the dearest people in our lives whom we keep deceiving. And we are so proud of that that we count ourselves as superstars.

Nonetheless, there are parents who have also been swept off by social media and totally don’t mind this so called ‘freedom’ on their children. Parents have stopped setting limits and showing their children, ‘this is the red line. Do not cross it.’ So how can we blame the youth completely? How can you blame a girl for posting her half naked picture while her mother was there while she was taking the snap and totally said nothing? How can we blame the boy for sleeping around with different women yet his parents very well know he didn’t spend the night home and wasn’t asked what he is up to? And yes, if parents keep being irresponsible and acting just as immature as their children then we can’t hope for a better future.

Whereas we; the current generations were expected to learn from our folks’ mistakes and become more responsible than they were in their youth age, we have totally failed with that. We; the social media generation, are the rotten generation and I honestly don’t think anyone really anticipates how the future generations would be as technology continues to grow. If you are still sane enough in this insane world then thank your Lord and pray that you die with your senses in place.

Creative Non-Fiction

HOW SCARY CHANGE CAN BE

By Lubnah Abdulhalim May 3, 2015

Photo Courtesy: http://cdn2.hubspot.net/

Yes. Change is scary. It is just like how you wake up one morning and feel unusual. You rush to the mirror and find yourself with a bulging nose or maybe your face is full of wrinkles and your hair is totally grey like you just turned 90 years. But how did that happen? I was just 20 yesterday?! Or you wake up and find yourself to have changed gender. You were a girl last night but you just woke up with a shaggy stylish hair cut, with a beard and oh, a deep voice too! Of course you can imagine how frightening such a scenario is. Each and every day, change is swallowing us like slow poison yet we don’t even realize it and that’s exactly what makes it even more frightening.

In life we go through so many physical, emotional, environmental and even psychological changes. We change schools, we move to another neighborhood, we change our diets, we change friends and so much more. Yet there is that dangerous change that’s invisible. The kind of change we all dont notice until we are already in the next level. How many times have you heard someone say, ‘I miss the old me?’ I bet so many many times. But where were you when that old you was going through transition to the brand new you? It’s because we don’t really pay attention to what goes on in our inner selves and most of the times we realize what has happened after it’s way too late.

It’s scary that today I may be poor and humble while tomorrow I may be filthy rich yet arrogant. It’s scary that maybe one day I will be smoking weed and wondering how I ever got to change that much. But nothing is impossible in this life. Don’t relax with the confidence that I will never change. Don’t be over confident that you are pious, that you are strong, that you are firm…all that can totally change in a split of a second. You may become the most arrogant and evil man on earth, you may become so weak and broken that you may not recognize yourself anymore when you take a look at the mirror. What better example can there be than that of Satan who was the most religious in heaven; no one went down on prostration to God more than him, then what happened? He refused to prostrate to Adam due to arrogance and that same arrogance is what made him the most evil living creature in this life. If he who was one of the most beloved to God could change in moments so about us? What about us; we, the weak human beings?

There is a very thin line of change between all sorts of things. Be it between good and bad, between safety and war, between beauty and ugliness, between being whole and being physically challenged. Change will always live within us. You may see a very pretty woman who is famous for her glamour and beauty and just a few moments later you may hear that she got an accident and her face was destroyed beyond repair. Yes, its scary. It’s scary that that once innocent and naive young girl may find herself in a man’ s bed while that young boy who has been playing around with so many girls decides to quit it all and finally settle down. It’s scary that the once down to earth man is now as proud as ever. It’s scary that today I am alive and tomorrow I may be hit by a bus. Or that just as I leave home, that goodbye I say to mum may be the very last one. When I come back home…she might as well be gone forever. It’s scary how much change is controlling us while we barely notice.

Not all change is bad. Sometimes its for the better and when it is for the better, then consistency is very important. You have finally decided to abandon all your ugly past life and you want a brand new life, that’s great! but learn how to keep up with that new life. Learn how to live without looking back at what is gone. Without missing your old ways, without wanting to go back there. Consistency. Learn to be consistent.

At whatever stage of life you may be at this time, have time to check yourself. And maybe its for the better that you realize how scary change can be…and that’s how you can learn to avoid those changes. Of course some changes are unavoidable like the bus that was meant to hit you or the job that you were to get fired from, but there is the change you can control; the behavioural change, the emotional change, the inner change. Make sure they don’t get out of control. Make sure they don’t take you to another level that will always make you regret, ‘how did this happen to me?!’ Instead lets all pray for positive change; the kind of change we can always look back at and say proudly, ‘I have really changed but I needed that change. I am now proud of myself than ever before.’

Creative Non-Fiction

IN THE HUMILIATION OF NEED

By Lubnah Abdulhalim May 2, 2015

IN THE HUMILIATION OF NEED

By Lubnah Abdulhalim

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

The word ‘need’ might as well be one of the most despicable words existing in the dictionary. Well, maybe not literally but we can say it is, hypothetically. Anything related to the word is often connected to misery, pain, agony or unhappiness. Whatever the need is; whether it is for food, water, money, shelter or anything else, there is no worse need than that of another human being. When need is attached to another human being, then there might as well be no other misery in this world than that.

Have you ever gone to ask for assistance from a person; it could be to ask for some money or help with an assignment or anything but once you get there, they will tell you to wait a moment. That moment may turn to minutes to hours and you are just seated there like a helpless sheep being extremely patient. Why? Because you are the one in need, so you have no option but endure all humiliation a person puts you through. After being kept there waiting for the whole day and maybe went without lunch, the person comes to you and asks you to come again the next day. That kind of game may go on for days before you finally get what you want. If you were hungry and it was food you were seeking, you might as well lack the appetite for the food anymore. By the end of it all, you are frustrated and humiliated beyond limits but you choose to swallow your pride and your personal dignity just because you are the one in need.

However much powerful one may be but once they are in need, arrogance often belongs to the satisfier of the need. It can be so annoying, agitating, irritating, frustrating how another human being can treat you like a puppet; “No, today I don’t have time to listen to your issue. Come next week.” And maybe at that moment, you’ve been going to the same person for the past two weeks. There has always been the option of just quitting and saying “I wont let another human being do this to me ever again” but being needy makes you weaker than you actually are. It makes you dependent; and being dependent is another miserable thing to live on.

Yet the most painful need is the need of affection from another. It is what messes up a person since they have attached all their happiness to this one person who may not even care for them as much as they do. It gives such kind of excruciating pain that may never heal. That kind of need; is like a basketball player that holds the ball in his/her little finger and swirls the ball with such expertize. The player is the satisfier of the need while you become the ball that is being controlled. You become as helpless as that ball and that player has power on what they want to do with you; whether to swirl and spin you in circles or drop you down or throw you from one hand to the other or simply kick you off. It is like how a person can just come into your once peaceful life and mess around with your life like they are messing and playing with your hair. That kind of need is what has left most people dead of emotions; they are tired of need.

I always thought honesty should be made a must rule to be followed. Lets keep it real and simple. You just be open and say, “hey buddy, so here’s the thing. I would really want to help you but I am sorry I can’t.” Or “Honestly, I don’t have sufficient time to teach you this. I think you’d better get someone else.” Or rather, “hey girl, I don’t want to play around with your feelings or to disrespect you…stop wasting your time on me.” It is undeniably true that the truth often hurts, but I believe its better you hit on point straight away so that the person in need knows how to sort themselves out. It’s not tasty to send a person up and down and in circles while you very well know you aint interested to help or offer what is expected of you. Believe me, all the blessings you were ever going to get by helping or assisting that needy person may all go to waste just because of the humiliation and suffering you made them go through before you finally gave them what they want. And if you are willing to help then do it with sincerity and without troubling the needy. Let’s learn how to be more compassionate. Today it may be me, him, or her who is need, tomorrow may be your day, who knows? After all, every dog has its day.