Guest Posts – Strokes of My Pen

Guest Posts

SCENTS FROM THE CRUSHED

By Ahmed Shayo June 9, 2022

1. My Emptiness

I wait for an ayah.

My eyes,
Cleft-like glass louvres on dusty windows
Close on windy days.

I miss Him.
This God of suns.
His fire,
The pride of the accursed devil,
Sings warmth to an audience of muddy skin.

I call my spine to bend
And I become
What letters are to a poem,
Unwavering shapes dressed in ink and paper,
Waiting to be read
Only
By The Ever Conscious,
The Most Beautiful,
And become a bee
Wrapped and glistened
Inside the nectar of His gaze

I wait for an ayah.
A word.
A sound in the silence.
Each passing moment lives in lips
Yet to part for air.

Oh Allah
Will You speak of
Me?

My emptiness will only break in the song of Your voice.

2. Perfume

God only crushes petals and wings.

His palm,
A distance that dwarfs entire horizons,
Breaks
The flower.
Creases rush in zig zags across the face.
Skin and bone fold
And the body is compelled by fragile compassion
To shatter its form.

I am your poem

The body says.

You speak,
And I bend into the shape of the next letter you say.
I am a word that can only become
After your voice creates me first with thought and then with sound.
In between breaths, I long for you.
There is no minute unworthy of a heartbreaking lament
At how this distance dares keep me away from you.

You are beautiful.
This heart is worthy of your creation.

How can you make something so soft hold
So much
Of what it
Feels
About you?

You crush me

And I declare in joy
My wish
To be among the ranks of flowers that offer you
The strongest perfume
For when you declare my
Death
And bring me closer to you.

3. Entropy

en•tro•py

/ˈɛntrəpi/

entropy, the measure of a system’s thermal energy per unit temperature that is unavailable for doing useful work. Because work is obtained from ordered molecular motion, the amount of entropy is also a measure of the molecular disorder, or randomness, of a system.

What happened here?

He asked.
The wind raged on,
Sails and dunes turned faceless looks to one direction.

A collision course lay between the now and the tomorrow,
And all we hope to become
Breaks
Before all we have to bear.

Time happened

I say.

There was no one left anymore.
And so everything was left to stand still.
Unattended.
Untouched.
A planet turns
And the heart stayed on its back,
Unable to be seen again.

This is the nature of entropy.
Destruction
Is promised on everything.

4. Fragrance

Open the doors to your mind, little one.

See
beyond your glass heart.

you will observe
an orbit of worlds
locked
in a tidal embrace with the sun,
twirling like pagans
inside a storm of angered gods.

and do not let the night blind you.

every part of the shadow
bends
before both bonfire and stars.
and so this suffering is merely
the Hand
that crushes the flower
to make you a perfume.

Guest Posts

NOT YOUR REGULAR MAID

By Chaos Cube March 6, 2022

The conversation is not in my head. It is not a committee brainstorming. These are voices. Each voice carries its own personality. Each personality is different from the rest. Just like humans. Each personality takes part at different times dealing with different people. I wear each personality like a dress. Unblemished. I’m not a person on my own. I don’t have my own attributes. They each have their own and with the right timing, each voice wears me and controls what I say, feel, or think. I am never on my own. So when Elina walked into my life on a rainy July afternoon, it was nothing but chaotic. I had a lot of chores that day I totally forgot my new house help was to arrive and I had to pick her up. I was a world away; doing my chores and having a million discussions with myself about a lot of nothings.

My sister and husband were trying to call me but could not reach me as my phone was always on silent mode. I was late to pick Elina up by 2 hours. When I finally picked her up it was pouring. I was on the phone with an acquaintance of mine talking about kids. Elina was sitting at the back cause of the baby car seat at the passenger front. We just greeted, I apologized for being late and continued the conversation on the phone. We reached home and she seemed accepting and all smiles. And started helping right away. She adjusted so well quite fast.

With Elina being around, my voices could not be loud enough. They don’t want her to know about their existence. When she is around; I can’t have a deep conversation or loud argument. So they stay back and watch me talk half-truths with Elina; laughing and mocking me, wishing they could slap me so hard physically. So I was always downstairs with Elina doing my chores because the minute I go upstairs to my bedroom, it’s a whole afternoon of arguments.

She wasn’t your regular house help. I considered her my assistant manager. She kept me company. We talked about everything. Some conversations were so weird that kept me thinking rather than arguing with my voices. The woman was smart, she arranged my life leave alone my house. She put everything where it belongs, it was a shock that my house was in disarray. How was I even living before all this? The most gratifying thing she ever did for me was looking after my 3rd child. I never wanted to have kids. I know it’s such a taboo or even shame for a woman to say such things because the next statement that will come after that is “Thank the Lord you have kids. Others don’t!” But not her. She was empathetic and carried all my troubles like her own. She was a dear friend like none I ever had before.

And now she’s leaving…

I sit with my thoughts, locked in my room. My youngest daughter is downstairs in her rocking chair watching baby shows. I lay in my bed, my journal on my side. I stare out my bedroom window at the trees surrounding the compound. The murmurous sound the leaves make all in unison. Different trees. Different leaves. Same sound. The peace that comes with it is the opposite of what I am feeling. It is a very quiet neighborhood. All you hear are the crows or my backyard hens. The never-ending tweets of birds. Shrieks. Singing. It’s all nature’s finest. I lay there confused. Cast down. All in dismay. The voices in my head all sit around me, having different conversations, trying to get me out of my agony.

Have a little faith and things will work out for the best. Have faith.

Another voice raises the question.

And where will she get another house help like the one she’s currently enjoying her presence and friendship? She’s settled so well and adjusted with her. She understands her work and deals with her so well. Where do you find such rare individuals? We’re doomed.

Another voice wells up; what if she gets someone better than her? Can we just take a chance and build our confidence rather than the latter?

I sit quietly listening. Thinking what a waste I am. I found this house help just by luck. She became a part of my life and my kids’ life and soon she will leave. I don’t mind a replacement. I am not one to force. But she became a friend. A good understanding friend. I never opened up to her. She doesn’t know the real me. She took me as I am with what I decided to expose to her. She adjusted so well. It is like she understood the assignment and blended perfectly well like two primary colors resulting in a perfect tertiary.

I was always a loner even amidst friends and family. I always felt alone. So ending up living alone was what I anticipated. How it came to that is a story for another day. For a long time, however, when my kids went to school during the day, I was always alone. That is how a normal person would see it. But to me, being surrounded by my voices I never felt alone. In fact when someone comes into my territory just like a cheetah; I fight. For my dominance. For my safety. To prevent myself from being hurt, used, and abused. So accepting my house help was a huge thing. I surrendered to her existence because I wouldn’t be able to handle kids, house chores, and being a wife. Even with a helper, I still can’t manage things. To handle life itself. So many responsibilities can cause me a major breakdown, especially on days like these when my depression is at an all high ugly.

Therefore, when Elina became a part of my life, I had to put my insecurities aside for a tad bit. I never had hopes she will stay long. In fact, on each of her off days, I would go to her room and just check if she left her belongings with her or they were in her room; always anticipating her departure for good.

I of course had my differences with her. At times I would go completely silent on her; give her the cold shoulder if she said or did anything to intentionally upset me. To avoid confrontations, the silent treatment served as a lesson not to say harsh things to me or do something just to upset me. Especially when it would upset almost anyone. With time she just learned of the things I don’t like and she kept away from doing them. With that problem out of the way, we started knowing each other well. I tried as much as I could to accept her for who she was. She taught me a lot. She taught me that anyone can be confident. Anyone has a right to be who they want to be. She taught me not to take things too seriously. She taught me the art of letting go and accepting whatever obstacle comes your way and tackling it head-on with grace. She may not have been that educated but she was brave. She taught me that even in awkward times, just smile and move regardless. She took her time but she was quick in completing tasks. She never had any fear in her. She helped me with my kids. Their school work. Their fussy meal planning, their tantrums, and even advised me on how to bring up well-behaved children.

Having guests never made her panic unlike me. We cleaned, we cooked, we arranged, we served and I invited guests over and over and everything ran smoothly. I thanked her in more ways I hope she will appreciate. She helped me through my gloomy days that sometimes stretched to weeks. She allowed me to have ‘me time’; an hour every day during the weekday for my gym sessions. We would go to the thrift market, even sometimes carry my infant and shop. Her choices were of good taste and style. Anyone would rock her choices with sophistication. She showed me around where the good deals happened. I was scared of taking motorbike rides and she showed me that it was a no biggie. She never judged me when we shared one motorbike ride and skimmed through tiny towns around the city, holding the motorist jacket like my whole life was on my hands and if I let go I’m dead. She just casually sat behind me supporting whatever it is I was doing. She never understood it was the rush I am dying for.

I took her to meet my family and everyone liked her. Her attitude was captivating. We talked a lot. General stuff. Religious stuff. Food-related. Clothes related. Gossip. We always kept each other company. She was a good person to converse with. My children adored her. They felt free with her. They could ask anything from her and she would oblige or try her best. I would leave her with the kids with no worry. She would feed them and put them to bed as if they were her own. I know to her it’s a sense of duty; she gets paid. It’s the humanity that made me look at her as a friend rather than an employee. How did she come to me when I was at my lowest? She picked me up and helped me on a daily. Why is she leaving when I need her the most? She was the only person who has so far helped me on an hourly basis. She was so dependable and reliable. She was exactly the kind of person I needed in my life. I never knew I needed a right-hand guide until I met her.

And now she is pregnant. She has to leave.

I have zero anticipation of her ever coming back after delivery. I wish she knew how hard it was for me to let her in. Perhaps she would have never walked out. But not everyone is like me. I am different. Elina agrees that I am different. I can never be as half strong as she is. Departure is here. She’s leaving. Heartache has arrived and settled in. She is not your regular maid.

Guest Posts

UNDECLARED LOVE

By Chaos Cube February 12, 2022

I have so much in me that I want to put in writing but again, I have so much in me that holds me back. Holds me back from my desires, my accomplishments, and my dreams; to fully explore myself and understand and know my limits. I have so much in me that I have not discovered or risked, not because of fear or shame or blame; it is the voices in my head. The voices that stop me from doing anything and everything; prisoning me in my own body. I know one day a person would read this and wonder how can voices control someone? But I am a living testament that voices that speak to you in your head can break you into more than a million pieces. I have lived with these voices in my head for years, for as long as I can remember.

Since I was a young girl, the voices kept me company through the worst years of my life. I was an utterly sad child. I never knew or understood myself until I was an adult undergoing years of psychiatric therapy. I was miserable. Sad. Brokenhearted. I was naive and felt so lonely in this world. I felt so unloved. So unwanted. So worthless. And for years, inflicting myself with pain was a way to ease the burden. I never had friends. Nobody could ever understand my mood swings, my irrational behaviour, my sudden manic episodes, being overexcited, or always agitated yet my voices; these persistent, irritating voices always gave me the best company. We would talk for hours. They would assure me with so much that they became my affirmations. These voices are still part of my life, and play a huge role even as a fully grown adult.

All along, I never had a sense of direction in my life. I still don’t. I am always stuck. I am still stuck; unable to move back or face the future; I am not present either. When I was a child, my grandma was the bridge between the constant darkness I was in and that unflickering ray of light at the end of the tunnel. I can’t say I had memorable moments with my grandma, I call them stolen treasurable moments. Every minute you would spend with her always felt like a win, yet they always kept me yearning for more. I can only describe her as a pearl deep in the ocean, right next to me, in my rock bottom. Always.

During my early years of life, grandma would at times gives me coins for my pocket money and I felt like the richest kid on the planet. I get it. Most children feel that excitement. But for me, it wasn’t just the money. It was always about her; the joy she gave me just by her mere presence. Her softness. It was she who showered me with unconditional love that still lingers around me like good perfume. She was my comfort, my safety net from all the physical and emotional trauma I went through. It was her reassurance and strength that always made me look forward to the holidays when she came from abroad to visit us. I would always sit next to her, feel her warmth, and just smile. I knew I could never physically hold her forever, but I did in my heart.

I lost my grandma early on when Corona hit. To say I miss my grandmother is an understatement. Nobody was allowed to travel or go visit her due to the imposed restrictions. To know she died all alone in a foreign hospital broke me cause she always feared being alone. I thought I had forever with my grandma and I always thought there will come a time that I would truly express how I felt towards her; what difference she made in my life. But Alzheimer’s struck her before I could ever profess my love for her. Before I had the courage to. All I could ever do when I visited my grandma was hug her tight, close my eyes, and try so hard not to cry for all the love I could never give her back. I loved my grandmother so much that it pained me, ached me deeply for I guess within me, I knew I’d never have something or someone that would see me as she did.

The last time I visited her, I hugged her hard, one last time, before saying goodbye. Deep down my confused self, I somehow felt this was my last time to ever see her. I looked at her and she was so sad. Her sorrowful face still lingers on my mind. She just sat quietly at the edge of her bed having no idea what was going on and even then, I could not utter those words. To date, I still close my eyes at night and silent tears run down my face for the sadness she left in me. I could never thank her for all the amazing things she ever did for us. She never made us feel left out or lacked anything. She had so many grandchildren but treated me and my sisters like we were her only children. I’m grateful for all that she showed me; taught me. All that she was to me.

I could write a million stories about her, but the truth is it will never fill the void she left in me. My biggest regret is I never was honest with her. She left with so much unsaid. A lot was unvoiced.

Hababa, I truly believe you’re in heaven for there was no purer soul than yours. This remains the only undisputed matter even with my voices. I hope you can somehow see or at least hear me, I can never seem to speak when it comes to you. I can only write. That’s the only way I knew how to keep your memories in me alive.

I miss you. I truly miss you. I thank God for your saved voice on my phone. I have a picture of your soft hands. Your striking smile. I want to thank you for giving me all those happy moments that nobody has so far given me. If there was a World Appreciation Day, you would bear the crown. You were exemplary. You are my hero. I love you so much because I have run out of words to describe how thankful and how lucky I am to have had you in my life.

Wherever you are…it is me again…writing..yet another story about you…for the immense love I carry for you for years.

Can you hear me?

I miss you.

Guest Posts

IS IT REALLY MEDIOCRITY OR THE BALANCE WE NEED?

By Najma Saleh March 28, 2021

Photo by Julien Bachelet from Pexels

We always talk about motivation, success, and leading a phenomenal life. Social media, movies, books are full of content that says you gotta get up and prove yourself or else succumb to leading a mediocre life.
So what, may I ask, is a mediocre life?

By today’s definition of a successful life, our parents’ lives and their parents’ lives before them would be considered mediocre.

My father was a highly successful man by today’s standards until he wasn’t. The highly successful life gave him health problems, many frenemies, and stole from him much that I cannot mention here.

When he lived a life that many would now consider unsuccessful he was happier -and his health improved. He balanced his priorities, got closer to Allah, and lived simply.

My mother raised seven of us against almost unfair odds but here we are. Someone asked my sister what work my Mum was involved in before she “retired”. The lady was shocked that my mum had never “worked” outside the house. Yet you cannot dismiss the energy, dedication, patience, and perseverance it takes to raise seven kids. She sewed all our clothes herself, cooked everything from scratch, and had neither blender nor vacuum cleaner- and most crucially- no disposable diapers to lighten her load.

Our grandparents and parents never felt the urge to prove themselves to anyone. If they fed, clothed, and educated their kids or more importantly raised their kids to have good morals and an honorable character they considered themselves successful.

They were happy with the little they had, led simple lives, and the highlights of their days were their prayers; the highlight of their week was Friday, and the highlight of their year was the two Eids. The highlight of their lives was when and if they were blessed to visit the Holy House in Makkah.
Their families were central and they made a point to reach out whenever they could.

Fast forward to today and all am seeing is PROVE YOURSELF! See, I believe that the only person you have to prove yourself to- if you must prove yourself at all- is yourself.

I abhor the messages being portrayed that in order to be successful you must sacrifice: a good night’s sleep; you must hustle until your signature becomes an autograph, that on your way to greatness, you must trust no one and certainly depend on no-one.

You will almost always end up missing your kids’ most important events when you adopt this mindset and you begin to see sleep and rest as something only for the weak.

I am appalled at the messages being bombarded at our young ones. Especially from this brutal education system that places more emphasis on grades than skills, on working ‘hard’ instead of working smart. A system that has no consideration for our children’s mental health.

That play, rest, and balance are for those who live in Miami, Florida (Trust me, I have been there and those guys know when to take a break) and not for Kenyans. This is why there are no P. E. lessons or Drama Clubs or variety shows or in our schools anymore C-19 aside.

Life is all about balance. It is about being present to appreciate whatever moment you are in.

What have we been sold to?

Mediocrity is when you exchange your wellbeing, your health and time spent with those you love in pursuit of being ‘king’. Worse still it is exchanging your time with your Lord to connect with Him for your hustle.

We must review our goals and renew our intentions.
What are we running around for?
What will make us feel satisfied at the end of our life?
There is also this ridiculous statement that you should do each day as if it was the end of your life. If it were the end of my life today I would not spend it chasing accolades, in front of a computer or stuck with people or a job I don’t particularly like just so to be seen that I am not living a mediocre life.

No, I would call my loved ones, ask for their duas and forgiveness and then I would never leave my prayer mat.

It would not matter that I have a PhD or make a bazillion dollars- it wouldn’t.

So why should it matter now?

Getting the PhD should not be an end in itself and neither should be making seven or eight figures. Not when it means I have no time for connection, God or my health.

Motivation, self help and all that is helpful there can be no doubt.
But let us be honest with ourselves and see what it is we are calling our youths – and ourselves- to get up and be.
Not upright citizens, not hufadhdul Quran not exemplary Muslims.

Don’t believe me? Just log into social media and see what I mean.

Guest Posts

ATTACHMENT THEORY

By Mushtak Ilamdin April 2, 2020

If you read my post without sending me money then you are a thief. You might as well throw a brick through my window and loot the place. Only joking, I do this for love because I have integrity. I press important issues in our society today to help you understand how other people think and work 🙂

I think one of the most shocking things I learned from my friends was how open some of them were with their own parents. It just baffled me when I would sit and listen to a friend talk about how he could express his emotions to his parents and get a ton of encouragement and support. I just had to sit there and pretend like my mind wasn’t being blown at the concept of people talking to their parents about things.

I have only a few friends who have had their own difficulties with their parents who understand the circumstances. I have a Nigerian friend who says his parents were super strict and it has really affected his social life as an adult. Even at 30 years old, he finds it extremely hard to connect (romantically) with other people. When I opened up to the woman who I thought loved me about all this, she cut me off claiming she isn’t my therapist.

The questions are; Does our childhood affect our adulthood? Is it easier to love and nurture a child than to ‘fix’ an adult with attachment issues? Is opening up a sign of weakness?

There have been studies that show how a traumatic childhood (parental divorce, child abuse, death of one or both parents) can literally change neural pathways of a child’s brain forever. The attachment theory argues that the attachment patterns we experience as children impact us in powerful ways throughout our lives. Many of us who experienced an insecure attachment will go on to create strained, hurtful or painful experience in later relationships. The good news is, as adults, it’s possible to develop earned secure attachment. Blaming your parents or yourself will not change anything. We can only learn as much as we can from our past and try to move forward positively, learn how to actively work against actions that show broken attachment. At some point, others may even be quite interested to know how we became so loving and caring. If all fails we can always seek professional help.

Another opinion is that it is the fault of society, that as Plato said, “people don’t mean to hate each other.” It happens because they are poor or desperate or really thirsty or in need of a vacation or struggling to pay for their second homes. Everyone has issues, it’s only that one person’s issues are different from the others.

You know I would love to continue with this but i have to go and appeal for money since I don’t get any funding. ? My closing statement: You who hold children dear, look after the little ones or forever in the world they will feel lost. Their happiness lies in your hands.

Attachment theory is a psychological, evolutionary and ethological theory concerning relationships between humans. The most important tenet of attachment theory is that a young child needs to develop a relationship with at least one primary caregiver for social and emotional development to occur normally.

Guest Posts

AMBIVALENCE

By Hood Ahmed February 29, 2020

We live in a society in which opinions, options, and information are proliferating everywhere, and ambivalence is on the rise. Which of these 15 brands of toothpaste do I prefer and why? Facebook turns on analogue emotions into binary oppositions: you either “like” something or you don’t. Self help books command us to be happy. Just the other day, a good friend of mine came running to me tormented by his own ambivalence. He loves both his girlfriends with all his heart. The questions are;is it possible to love two people equally at the same time? or love and hate someone or something at the same time? When you are of two minds about something, how do you “negotiate” between them? Is ambivalence awesome or is it awful? In these times that I don’t know what I want; perhaps I don’t want what I know and want what I don’t know. We are the ambivalents; unable to see both sides of the arguments, frozen in no-mans-land between armies of true believers, no ballot allows you to vote for competing candidates, no questionnaire in which you can just tick the box. So we avoid the question or check “I don’t know”, or grit our teeth and pick a side.

A member of the uncertainty lab noted that our metaphors for ambivalence are rooted in our body: we say, on the one hand, on the other hand.” And we “feel torn” before taking a stand. The trouble is, the human mind hates uncertainty and protests the dissonance that arises when two seemingly opposed thoughts or feelings that exist at once.

The world is an overstimulating, potentially overwhelming place n our brains are designed to filter, reduce and simplify. But when it is our own internal experience, our brains are attempting to simplify and we put ourselves at emotional risk.

Personally I’d prefer that my ultimate decision, come from my highest noblest self. But at the same time I don’t want to make a choice that could lead to feeling deprived, exploited or unfulfilled. In such situations, even though the inevitable post-decision ambivalence can never be 100% resolved, it is usually mostly resolved through the well known phenomenon of cognitive dissonance.

Cognitive Dissonance (CD) plays a major role in value judgments, decisions, and evaluations. Becoming aware of how conflicting beliefs impact decision making process is a great way to improve your ability to make faster and more accurate choices. It is a matter of determining and perhaps more from the heart than the head which deserve to be given high priority; or weighted more heavily. Any personally satisfying conclusion must offer the individual the best possible affirmation of self.

*Ambivalence: The state of having mixed feelings or contradictory ideas about something or someone.

*Cognitive Dissonance: In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the experience of psychological stress that occurs when a person holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, values, or participates in an action that goes against one of these three.

Guest Posts

THE STRIVING SOUL: A REVIEW

By Hafswa Khamis February 25, 2020

Well, here’s the long due review. As I started reading the book, I already knew I did not want it to end so I resorted to reading only a few pages a day so that it may last as long as possible. I couldn’t help but remember my friend who jokes about how unfair it can be when the rate of consumption is faster than the rate of production. She says how can one prepare food for three hours only for it to be eaten in five minutes? How can one strive the whole month to earn money only for it to be spent in a week? How can one take a whole year to write a book only for one to read it overnight? So I hoped in taking a long time to read it I would have done some little justice to the long time it took to write it.

I like it when a book is divided into parts that are related to each other whereby each part seems to complement the other parts. This reminds me of the book When Breath Becomes Air which is divided into two parts. Part 1: in perfect health I begin describes the author’s life before he was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer and part 2: cease not till death describes his life after the diagnosis. I do not know whether it is because I like poems or the titles truly did sound poetic but it gave me the impression that part two is a completion of part one just like the phrase cease not till death completes the phrase in perfect health I begin. I got the same feeling as I read the parts of this book. I saw the chapters as a journey with one part leading onto the next. We start with an aching soul but through pondering, it came to believe. By pondering over Allah’s creation, it came to believe in Allah; by pondering on its blessings and capabilities, it came to believe in its self and its abilities; by pondering about how other people survived struggles that were similar to my own struggles and how the survivors were willing to help others, I came to believe in the power of humanity. And after believing, the soul was finally able to love; to love its Creator, to love itself, and to love the creation. At least that is how I saw the chapters to complete each other.

Many a times I read a page and I felt as if the thoughts were taken right out of my brain. I related deeply to a lot of parts and it felt amazing and shocking at the same to know that someone else out there was having similar thoughts. I stuck page markers on the pages that resonated with me most and I ran out of them and I had to resort to folding the top of pages despite not wanting to distort the book in any way because I felt protective of it.

As I read some parts, I felt that the words were coming from a very deep place. I wondered whether it was easy for the writer to write them down. Because for me, I find it very difficult to put my innermost thoughts on paper for fear that other people might read them and get an access into my mind. A mind which has some thoughts I hold too dear that I find sharing them will make them lose their value. I have a fear that letting people know what transpires in my brain will make me vulnerable and exposed. I fear I might lose the privacy that I reverently cherish. This is something that was holding me back from writing and I’m still working on overcoming it. I wonder whether the writer has a similar hesitance when it comes to writing about innermost feelings or whether it’s not a challenge for her.

The hallmark of it all was that the book was signed for me despite the writer not really knowing me. And I keep on going back to the message to remind myself to keep striving. Talking of the idea of striving, it reminds me of another concept that I adore. The concept of Ihsaan. The concept of doing everything that one does to their best of abilities, in the best way and form possible. If you knew me personally you’d know that I keep on stressing about it. I find striving to be part of Ihsaan since it entails working towards being the best version of oneself.

This is one of the few paperbacks that I own and I think I’ll keep on revisiting it time and again until the cherished lines are committed to memory. I want to read it so many times that the pages threaten to fade from overuse. And I don’t think I’m willing to lend it to anyone because I intend to keep it as a personal journal, jotting down my thought on the bottom of the pages. So if I manage to get one interested in the book, they have to get their own copy! The least I could do is market the book right?

To get your copy, contact: 0704 731 560. The book can be sent as a parcel to wherever you are!

***

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Deen (Religion)

100 HADITHS ON WOMEN (PART 5)

By Khalid Fauz Abdalla December 31, 2019

You may read part 4 at: https://lubnah.me.ke/100-hadiths-on-women-part-4/

E. MARRIAGE كتاب النكاح

1.Teasing co-wife with falsehood

Narrated Asma: Some lady said, “O Allah’s Messenger My husband has another wife, so it is sinful of me to claim that he has given me what he has not given me (in order to tease her)?” Allah’s Messenger(ﷺ) said, The one who pretends that he has been given what he has not been given, is just like the (false) one who wears two garments of falsehood.”

عَنْ أسْمَاَء، عَنِ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم. حدَثنِي محَمَُّد بنُ اْلمُثنى، حََّدَثنا يحْيى، عنْ هِشا مٍ، حََّدَثتنِي فَاطِمَُة، عَنْ أسْمَاَء، أن اْمرَأة، قاَلتْ يا رَسوَل اَّلِلّ إَِّن لي ضَرًَّة، فهلْ عََلىَّ جُناحٌ إِْن تشَبَّعْتُ مِنْ زَوْجِي غَيرَ اَّلِذي يعْطِينِي فقاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” اْلمُتَشَبِ عُ بِمَا لمْ يعْطَ كلَابِسِ ثوَْبىْ زُورٍ “. Sahih al-Bukhari 5219

2. A woman whose husband is absent

Fadala ibn ‘Ubayd reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “Do not ask about three: a man who parts company with the community, rebels the ruler and dies while he is a still a rebel. Do not ask about him. Or a slave or slavegirl who runs away from his master. Or a woman whose husband is absent and who has sufficient provision and then displays her adornments to strangers and mixes freely. Do not ask about three: a man who contends with Allah regarding His cloak. His cloak is pride and His wrapper is His might. Also a man who doubts the command of Allah. and someone who despairs of Allah’s mercy.”

عَنْ فضَاَلَة بنِ عُبيد، عَنِ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَ ل: ثلَاَثٌة لَا يسْأل عَنه مْ: رَجُلٌ فَارَقَ اْلجمَاعََة وَعَصَى إَِماَمُه فمَاتَ عَاصِيا، فلَا تسْأل عنُْه، وَأََمٌة أَوْ عَبد أَبِقَ مِنْ سَي دهِ، وَاْمر أة غَابَ زَوْجها، وَكفاَها مؤُوَنة الُّدْنيا فتبرَّجَتْ وََتمَرَّجَتْ بعَْدُ ه. وََثلَاَثٌة لَا يسأَُل عَنه مْ: رَجُلٌ نازَعَ اَّلَلّ رَِداَءُه، فإَّن رَِداَءُه اْلكِبْرَِياُء، وَإزَارَُه عِزَُّه، وَرَجُلٌ شَكَّ فِي أمرِ الِله، وَالقُنُوطُ مِنْ رَحمَةِ الِله. Grade : Sahih (Al-Albani)

3. A man (even male in-laws) should not stay with a woman in seclusion

Narrated `Uqba bin ‘Amir: Allah’s Messenger said, “Beware of entering upon the ladies.” A man from the Ansar said, “Allah’s Apostle! What about Al-Hamu the in-laws of the wife (the brothers of her husband or his nephews etc.)?” The Prophetreplied: The in-laws of the wife are death itself.

عَنْ عُقبة بنِ عَامِرٍ، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل ” إَِّياكُ مْ وَالُّدخُوَل عََلى النِ ساِء “. فقَاَل رَجُلٌ مِنَ الَأْنصَارِ يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ أفَرَأيتَ اْلحمْ وَ. قاَل ” اْلحَموُ اْلمَوْتُ “. Sahih al-Bukhari 5232

4. Describing another woman to her husband

Narrated `Abdullah bin Mas`ud: The Prophet(ﷺ) said, “A woman should not look at or touch another woman to describe her to her husband in such a way as if he was actually looking at her.”

عَنْ عَبد اَّلِلّ بنِ مسْعُوٍد ـ رضى الله عنه ـ قَاَل قَاَل النبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” لَا تبَاشِرِ اْلمَرْأَُة اْلمَرْأة فتنعَتها لزَوْجها، كأنُه ينْظرُ إَِليَْها “. Sahih al-Bukhari 5240

5. Proposing to a decent man

Narrated Thabit: that he heard Anas saying, “A woman came to the Prophet(ﷺ) offering herself to him in marriage, saying, “Have you got any interest in me (i.e. would you like to marry me?)” Anas’s daughter said, “How shameless that woman was!” On that Anas said, “She is better than you, for she presented herself to Allah’s Messenger(ﷺ) ( for marriage).

حََّدَثنا مسََّدٌد، حََّدَثنا مرْحُومٌ، سَمِعْتُ ثابِتًا، أََّنه سَمِعَ أََنسًا ـ رضى الله عنه ـ يقوُل جَاَءتِ اْمرَأة إَِلى النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم تعْرِضُ عََليهِ نفسها فقاَلتْ هلْ لكَ حَاجٌَة فِيَّ فقاَلتِ اْبنته ما أقلَّ حيَاَءَها. فقاَل هِيَ خَيْرٌ مِنكِ، عَرَضَتْ عََلى رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم نفسََها. Sahih al-Bukhari 6123

6. Choice in marriage

Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas: A virgin came to the Prophet(ﷺ) and mentioned that her father had married her against her will, so the Prophet(ﷺ) allowed her to exercise her choice.

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، أن جَارَِيًة، بِكرًا أتتِ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فذكرَتْ أن أباَها زَوَّجها وَهِيَ كارَِهٌة فَخيرََها النبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم . Sahih (Al-Albani)

7. Asking for divorce without a good reason

Narrated Thawban: The Prophet(ﷺ) said: If any woman asks her husband for divorce without some strong reason, the odour of Paradise will be forbidden to her.

عَنْ ثوَْباَن، قاَل قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” أيمَا اْمرَأةٍ سَألتْ زَوْجََها طلَاقًا فِي غيْرِ ما بأْسٍ فحَرَامٌ عليَْها رَائِحة اْلجَنةِ ” .Sahih (Al-Albani) SunanAbiDawud 2226

8. Woman taking care of in-laws

Narrated Jabir bin `Abdullah: My father died and left seven or nine girls and I married a matron. Allah’s Messenger(ﷺ) said to me, “O Jabir! Have you married?” I said, “Yes.” He said, “A virgin or a matron?” I replied, “A matron.” he said, “Why not a virgin, so that you might play with her and she with you, and you might amuse her and she amuse you.” I said, ” `Abdullah (my father) died and left girls, and I dislike to marry a girl like them, so I married a lady (matron) so that she may look after them.” On that he said, “May Allah bless you,” or “That is good.”

عَنْ جَابِرِ بنِ عَبد اَّلِلّ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ قاَل هَلكَ أَبِي وََترَكَ سَبعَ بناتٍ أوْ تِسْعَ بنَاتٍ ف تَزَوَّجتُ اْمرَأًَة ثيِ با فقاَل لي رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” تزَوَّجْتَ يا جَابِرُ “. فقلتُ نعَ مْ. فقاَل ” بِكْرًا أَمْ ثيِ با “. قُْلتُ بلْ ثي با. قاَل ” فهلَّا جَارَِيًة تلَاعِبَُها وَُتلاعِبكَ، وَُتضَاحكها وَُتضَاحككَ “. قاَل فقُْلتُ لُه إَِّن عبَْد اَّلِلّ هَلكَ وََترَكَ بناتٍ، وَإِ نِي كرِْهتُ أن أجِيئَُهنَّ بِمِثْلِهِنَّ، فَتزَوَّجْتُ اْمرَأة تقومُ عََليهِنَّ وَُتصْلِحُُهنَّ . فقَاَل ” بارَكَ اَّلُلّ لكَ “. أَوْ قاَل خَيرًا. Sahih al-Bukhari 5367

9. If a man does not provide for his family

Narrated `Aisha: Hind (bint `Utba) said to the Prophet(ﷺ) ” Abu Sufyan is a miserly man and I need to take some money of his wealth.” The Prophet(ﷺ) said, “Take reasonably what is sufficient for you and your children ”

، عَنْ عَائِشََة ـ رضى الله عنها ـ أن هِنَْد، قاَلتْ للنبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم إَِّن أبا سُفيَاَن رَجلٌ شحِيحٌ، فَأَحْتاجُ أَْن آخَُذ مِنْ ماِلهِ . قاَل ” خُِذي ما يكْفِيكِ ووََلدكِ بِاْلمَعْرُوفِ “. Sahih al-Bukhari 7180

10. Asking permission for marriage

It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbas that the Messenger of Allah said: “A previously married woman has more right to decide about herself (with regard to marriage) than her guardian, and a virgin should be asked for permission with regard to marriage, and her permission is her silence.”

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل ” الَأ يِمُ أحَقُّ بِنفسَِها مِنْ وَِلي ها وَاْلبِكْرُ تسْتَأْذ ن فِي نفسَِها وَإِذُْنَها صُمَاُتَها ” . Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3260

11. Taking good care of daughters

Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: The Messenger of Allah said, “He who is involved (in the responsibility) of (bringing up) daughters, and he is benevolent towards them, they would become protection for him against Hell-fire”.

“من ابتلي من هذه البنات بشيء فأحسن إليهن كن له سترًا من النار” ))متفق عليه((. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

12. Voicing injustice on women when against the teachings of Islam.

It was narrated from Ibn Buraidah that: his father said: “A girl came to the Prophet and said: ‘My father married me to his brother’s son so that he might raise his status thereby.’ The Prophet gave her the choice, and she said: ‘I approve of what my father did, but I wanted women to know that their fathers have no right to do that.’ ”

عَنِ اْبنِ برَْيَدَة، عَنْ أبِيهِ، قاَل جاَءتْ فتَاٌة إلى النَّبِيِ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ فقاَلتْ إَِّن أَبِي زَوَّجَنِي اْبنَ أخيهِ ليرْفعَ بِي خَسِيسَته . قاَل فَجعَلَ الَأْمرَ إَِليها . فَقاَلتْ قد أجَزْتُ ما صَنَعَ أبِي وََلكِنْ أَرَْدتُ أَْن تعلمَ النِ سَاُء أن ليسَ إَِلى الآَباِء مِنَ الَأْمرِ شىء . Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan Ibn Majah 1874

13. The working of a lady in her husband’s house

Narrated `Ali: Fatima went to the Prophet (ﷺ)complaining about the bad effect of the stone hand-mill on her hand. She heard that the Prophet (ﷺ)had received a few slave girls. But (when she came there) she did not find him, so she mentioned her problem to `Aisha. When the Prophet (ﷺ))came, `Aisha informed him about that. `Ali added, “So the Prophet ( )ﷺcame to us when we had gone to bed. We wanted to get up (on his arrival) but he said, ‘Stay where you are.” Then he came and sat between me and her and I felt the coldness of his feet on my `Abdomen. He said, “Shall I direct you to something better than what you have requested? When you go to bed say ‘Subhan Allah’ thirtythree times, ‘Al hamduli l-lah’ thirty three times, and Allahu Akbar’ thirty four times, for that is better for you than a servant.”

حََّدَثنا عَلِيٌّ، أن فاطِمة ـ عََليهِمَا السلَامُ ـ أََتتِ النبيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم تشْكو إليهِ ما تْلقى فِي يدَها مِنَ الرَّحَى، وََبَلغََها أنُه جَاَءه رَقِيقٌ فلمْ تصاِدفه، فََذكرتْ ذَِلكَ لعَائِشََة، فلمَّا جَاَء أخْبرَْتُه عائِشَُة ـ قَ اَل ـ فَجَاَءَنا وَقد أخَْذنا مضَاجعَنا، فََذهبْنَا نقومُ فَقَاَل ” عََلى مكانِكمَا “. فجَاَء فقَعََد بيْنِي وََبيْنََها حتى وَجدتُ برد قدَميهِ عََلى بطْني فقَاَل ” ألَا أدُّلكُما عََلى خيرٍ مِمَّا سَألتمَا، إِ ذَا أخَْذتما مضَاجِعَكُمَا ـ أوْ أَوَْيتما إَِلى فِرَاشِكمَا ـ فسَبِ حَا ثلَاًثا وََثلَاثِينَ، وَاحمََدا ثلاثا وََثلَاثِينَ، وَكبِ رَا أرَْبعًا وثلَاثِينَ، فهوَ خيْرٌ لكما منْ خَاِدمٍ “. Sahih al-Bukhari 5361

14. Supporting your dependants.

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)said, “The best alms is that which you give when you are rich, and you should start first to support your dependants.”

عَن أبِي هرَْيرََة،أ ن رَسُول اَّ للّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل ” خَيرُال صََّدق ةِ ماكان عَن ظَْهرِ غِنًى، وَاْبَدأْ بِمن تعُوُ ل .”Sahih al-Bukhari 5356

15. To provide one’s family with food sufficient in advance

Narrated `Umar: The Prophet (ﷺ)used to sell the dates of the garden of Bani An-Nadir and store for his family so much food as would cover their needs for a whole year.

عَنْ عُمَرَـ رض ىالله عنه ـ أ ن النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم كَاَن يبِيعُ نخْلَ بنِي النضِيرِ،وََيحبِسُ لَأْهلِهِ قُوتَ سَنتِهِمْ . Sahih al-Bukhari 5357

16. Lying about the father of your child

“Then the Verse of Li’an was revealed, the Messenger of Allah ()ﷺ said: ‘Any woman who attributed her child to people to whom he does not belong, then she has no relation to (the religion of) Allah, and she will never enter Paradise, and any man who rejects his child, while he recognizes him, Allah will screen Himself from him on the Day of Resurrection and disgrace him before the witnesses.’”

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، قاَل لمَّا نزََلتْ آَيُة ال لِ عَانِ قَاَل رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” أَُّيمَا اْمرَأَةٍ أَْلحَقَتْ بِقَوْمٍ منْ ليسَ مِنهمْ فليسَتْ مِنَ اَّلِلّ فِي شىٍْء وََلنْ يْدخَِلها جَنته وَأيمَا رَجُلٍ أنكرَ وََلَدُه وَقَْد عرَفه احْتجَبَ اَّلُلّ مِنه يوْمَ اْلقِياَمةِ وَفضحه على رُُءوسِ الَأشَْهاِد ” . Grade: Hasan (Darussalam)

17. Regarding dowry

It was narrated that: Abu Ajfa As-Sulami said: “Umar bin Khattab said: ‘Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honor and dignity in this world or a sign of Taqwa before Allah, then Muhammad ()ﷺ would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives and none of his daughters were given more than twelve uqiyyah. A man may increase dowry until he feels resentment against her and says: “You cost me everything I own,” or, “You caused me a great deal of hardship.”’” (Hassan) – uqiyyah is 40 dirham, total 480 dirham

عَنْ أبِي اْلعَجْفاِء السَُّلمِيِ ، قاَل قَاَل عمَرُ بنُ اْلخَطَّابِ لَا تغَاُلوا صََداقَ النِ سَاِء فإَّنَها لوْ كاَنتْ مكْرَُمة فِي الُّدْنيا أوْ تقوًى عِند اَّلِلّ كَاَن أوْلَاكُمْ وَأحقكُمْ بَِها محَمٌَّد ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ ما أَصدقَ اْمرَأًَة مِنْ نِسَائِهِ وَلَا أصِْدقَتِ اْمرَأة مِنْ بنَاتِهِ أكْثَرَ مِنِ اْثنتىْ عَشْرََة أوقِية وَإَِّن الرَّجُلَ ليثقِ لُ صدقة اْمرَأَتِهِ حَتى يكُوَن لَها عََداوٌَة فِي نفسِهِ وََيقُوُل قد كَلِفتُ إَِليكِ عََلقَ اْلقِرَْبةِ أوْ عَرَقَ اْلقِرَْبةِ . وَكنْتُ رَجلًا عرَبِيًّا موََّلدا ما أدرِي ما عََلقُ اْلقِرَْبةِ أوْ عَرَقُ اْلقِرَْبةِ . Grade: Sahih (Darussalam)

18. Causing another woman’s divorce

Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah’s Messenger ()ﷺ forbade the selling of things by a town dweller on behalf of a desert dweller; and similarly Najsh was forbidden. And one should not urge somebody to return the goods to the seller so as to sell him his own goods; nor should one demand the hand of a girl who has already been engaged to someone else; and a woman should not try to cause some other woman to be divorced in order to take her place. Sahih al-Bukhari 2140

عَنْ أَبِي هرَْيرََة ـ رضى الله عنه ـ قاَل نَهى رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أ ن يبِيعَ حَاضِرٌ لبَاٍد، وَلَا تنَاجَشُوا، وَلَا يبِيعُ الرَّجُلُ عََلى بيْعِ أَخِيهِ وَلَا يخْطُبُ عََلى خطْبةِ أخيهِ، وَلَا تسْأل اْلمَرْأَُة طلَاقَ أختَِها لتكفَأَ ما فِي إَِنائَِها

19. Woman, a guardian of the house and children

Narrated `Abdullah: Allah’s Messenger ()ﷺ said, “Everyone of you is a guardian and is responsible for his charges. The ruler who has authority over people, is a guardian and is responsible for them, a man is a guardian of his family and is responsible for them; a woman is a guardian of her husband’s house and children and is responsible for them; a slave (‘Abu ) is a guardian of his master’s property and is responsible for it; so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your charges.” Sahih al-Bukhari 2554

عَنْ عَبد اَّلِلّ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ أن رَسوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل كلكُمْ رَاعٍ فمَسْئوٌل عنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ، فالأمِيرُ اَّلذي عََلى الناسِ رَاعٍ وَْهوَ مسْئوٌل عنُْهمْ، وَالرَّجُلُ رَاعٍ عََلى أهلِ بيتِهِ وَْهوَ مسْئُوٌل عَنهمْ، وَاْلمَرْأَُة رَاعِية عََلى بيتِ بعْلَِها وَوََلِدهِ وَْهىَ مسْئُوَلٌة عنُْهمْ، وَاْلعَبد رَاعٍ عََلى مالِ سَي دهِ وَْهوَ مسْئوٌل عَنُْه، ألَا فكُُّلكمْ رَاعٍ وَكُُّلكمْ مسْئوٌل عَنْ رَعِيتِهِ .

20. Being in eddah

It was narrated that Umm ‘Atiyyah said: “The Messenger of Allah said: ‘No woman should mourn for anyone who dies for more than three days, except for a husband, for whom she should mourn for four months and ten days. She should not wear garments that are dyed or patterned, or put on kohl or comb her hair, and she should not put on any perfume except when purifying herself after her period, when she may use a little of Qust or Azfar.'” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3534

عَنْ أمِ عَطِية، قاَلتْ قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم : لَا تحد اْمرَأة عََلى مي تٍ فوْقَ ثلَاثٍ إِلَّا على زَوْجٍ فَِإَّنَها تحد عََليهِ أرَْبعََة أشُْهرٍ وَعشرًا وَلَا تْلبَسُ ثوًْبا مصْبوغًا وَلَا ثوْبَ عَصْبٍ وَلَا تكتحلُ وَلَا تمْتَشِطُ وَلَا تمسُّ طِيبا إِلَّا عِند طُْه رَِها حينَ تطُْهرُ نبًَذا مِنْ قُسطٍ وَأَظْفَارٍ .

21. Prohibition of Mut’ah (Temporary marriage)

Sabra al-Juhani reported on the authority of his father that while he was with Allah’s Messenger ()ﷺ he said: O people, I had permitted you to contract temporary marriage with women, but Allah has forbidden it (now) until the Day of Resurrection. So he who has any (woman with this type of marriage contract) he should let her off, and do not take back anything you have given to them (as dower). Sahih Muslim 1406 d

حََّدَثنِي الرَّبِيعُ بنُ سَبرََة اْلجَُهنِيُّ، أََّن أََباُه، حََّدَثه أََّنُه، كاَن معَ رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقاَل يا أَُّيَها الناسُ إِ نِي قد كنتُ أذْنتُ لكُمْ فِي الِاستِمتاعِ مِنَ النِ سَاِء وَإَِّن اَّلَلّ قد ح رَّمَ ذَِلكَ إَِلى يوْمِ اْلقِيَاَمةِ فَمنْ كَاَن عِندُه مِنهنَّ شَىء فليخَلِ سَبِيَله وَلَا تأخذوا مِما آَتيتمُوُهنَّ شَيْئا” .

22. Consultation and permission before marriage

Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Messenger ()ﷺ as having said: A woman without a husband (or divorced or a widow) must not be married until she is consulted, and a virgin must not be married until her permission is sought. They asked the Prophet of Allah ()ﷺ : How her (virgin’s) consent can be solicited? He (the Holy Prophet) said: That she keeps silence. Sahih Muslim 1419 a

حََّدثنا أبو هرَْيرََة، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل لَا تنكحُ الَأ يِمُ حَتى تسْتأمرَ وَلَا تنْكَحُ اْلبِكرُ حَتَّى تسْتأذََ ن ” . قَاُلوا يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ وَكَيْفَ إِذُْنَها قَاَل ” أَْن تسْكتَ ”

23. Permission to do your day to day activities while on eddah

Jabir b. ‘Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: My maternal aunt was divorced, and she intended to pluck her dates. A person scolded her for having come out (during the period of ‘Idda). She came to Allah’s Prophet ( .)ﷺand he said: Certainly you can pluck (dates) from your palm trees, for perhaps you may give charity or do an act of kindness. Sahih Muslim 1483

جَابِرَ بنَ عَبد اَّلِلّ، يقوُل طُ لِقتْ خَاَلتِي فَأَرَاَدتْ أَْن تجَُّد نخَْلَها فزَجَرََها رَجُلٌ أن تخْرُجَ فَأََتتِ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقاَل بَلى فجُ دي نخَْلكِ فإَّنكِ عسى أَْن تصََّدقِي أوْ تفعَلِي معْرُوفا ”

24. Observing eddah

Umm ‘Atiyya (‘Allah be pleased with her) said: We were forbidden to observe mourning for the dead beyond three days except in the case of husband (where it is permissible) for four months and ten days, and (that during this period) we should neither use collyrium nor touch perfume, nor wear dyed clothes, but concession was given to a woman when one of us was purified of our courses to make use of a little incense or scent. Sahih Muslim 938 e

عَنْ أمِ عَطِيََّة، قاَلتْ كنا ننهى أَْن نحَِّد على ميِ تٍ فَوْقَ ثلَاثٍ إِلَّا عََلى زَوْجٍ أرَْب عََة أشُْهرٍ وَعشرًا وَلَا نكْتَحلُ وَلَا نتَطَيبُ وَلَا نْلبسُ ثوًْبا مصْبوغًا وَقَْد رُخِ صَ لْلمَرْأَةِ فِي طُْهرَِها إِذَا اغْتسََلتْ إِحَْداَنا مِنْ محِيضَِها فِي نبذةٍ مِنْ قُسطٍ وَأظْفارٍ .

25. Being married is better than being divorced

It was narrated that ‘Aishah said: “This Verse ‘And making peace is better.’ Was revealed concerning a man who had been married to a woman for a long time, and she had given birth to his children and he wanted to exchange her (for a new wife). She agreed that he would stay with her (the new wife) and would not give her (the first wife) a share of his time. (i.e.) not spend the nights with her).” Sahih (Darussalam) Arabic : Book 9, Hadith 2050 Sunan Ibn Majah

عَنْ عَائِشََة، . أنَها قاَل تْ نزََلتْ هذهِ الآَيُة }وَالصُّْلحُ خَيْرٌ{ فِي رَجُلٍ كاَنتْ تحْته اْمرَأٌَة قد طاَلتْ صحْبتها وَولَدتْ مِنه أوْلَاًدا فأرَاَد أن يستَبِْدَل بَِها فرَاضَته عََلى أن تقِيمَ عِندُه وَلَا يقسِمَ لَها .

26. Waking up your spouse for prayer

It was narrated that Abu Hurairah said: “The Messenger of Allah ()ﷺ said: ‘May Allah (SWT) have mercy on a man who gets up at night and prays, then he wakes his wife and she prays, and if she refuses he sprinkles water in her face. And may Allah (SWT) have mercy on a woman who gets up at night and prays, then she wakes her husband and prays, and if he refuses she sprinkles water in his face.’” Hasan Sunan an-Nasa’i 1610

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، قاَل قاَ ل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم : رَحِمَ اَّلُلّ رَجُلًا قامَ مِنَ الَّليلِ فَصلى ثمَّ أَْيقَظَ اْمرَأََتُه فَصََّلتْ فإْن أبتْ نضَحَ فِي وَجْهَِها اْلمَاَء وَرَحِمَ اَّلُلّ اْمرَأًَة قَاَمتْ مِنَ الَّليلِ فصََّلتْ ثمَّ أيقظَتْ زَوْ جََها فصلى فَِإن أََبى نضَحَتْ فِي وَجْهِهِ اْلمَاَء ”

27. Permission to look at a woman while proposing

It was narrated that Al-Mughirah bin Shu’bah said: “I proposed marriage to a woman during the time of the Messenger of Allah, and the Prophet said: ‘Have you seen her?’ I said: ‘No.’ He said: ‘Look at her, for that is more likely to create love between you.’” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3235

عَنِ اْلمُغِيرَةِ بنِ شُعْبة، قاَل خَطَبْتُ اْمرَأًَة على عَْهِد رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقَاَل النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أنظَرْتَ إَِليها ” . قلتُ لَا . قاَل ” فَاْنظُرْ إَِليها فإَّنُه أجَْدرُ أن يؤَْدمَ بيْنَكُمَا ” .

28. A disbeliever should not marry Muslim

It was narrated that Anas said: “Abu Talhah proposed marriage to Umm Sulaim and she said: ‘By Allah, a man like you is not to be rejected, O Abu Talhah, but you are a disbeliever and I am a Muslim, and it is not permissible for me to marry you. If you become Muslim, that will be my dowry, and I will not ask you for anything else.’ So he became Muslim and that was her dowry.” (one of the narrators) Thabit said: “I have never heard of a woman whose dowry was more precious than Umm Sulaim (whose dowry was) Islam. And he consummated the marriage with her, and she bore him a child.” Hasan (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3341

عَنْ أنسٍ، قاَل خَطَبَ أبو طَْلحََة أمَّ سليْمٍ فقاَلتْ وَاَّلِلّ ما مِثُْلكَ يا أبا طَْلحََة يرَُّد وََلكِنكَ رَجلٌ كَافِرٌ وَأََنا اْمرَأة مسْلِمٌَة وَلَا يحلُّ لي أن أتزَوَّجكَ فَِإْن تسْلِمْ فََذاكَ مهرِي وََما أسْألكَ غَيرَُه . فأسَْلمَ فَكَاَن ذَِلكَ مْهرََها – قَاَل ثابِتٌ فمَا سَمِعْ تُ بِاْمرَأةٍ قطُّ كاَنتْ أكْرَمَ مْهرًا مِنْ أُمِ سَُليمٍ الإسْلَامَ – فََدخَلَ بَِها فوََلَدتْ لُه .

29. Husband dying before consummating the marriage

It was narrated from ‘Abdullah that a woman was brought to him who had married a man then he had died without naming any dowry for her and without consummating the marriage with her. They kept coming to him for nearly a month, and he did not issue any ruling to them. Then he said: “I think that she should have a dowry like that of her peers no less, with no injustice and she may inherit from him and she has to observe the ‘Iddah.” Ma’qil bin Sinan Al-Ashja’i testified: “The Messenger of Allah passed a similar judgment concerning Birwa’ bint Washiq.” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3355

عَنْ عَبد اَّلِلّ، أََّنُه أتِيَ فِي اْمرَأَةٍ تزَوَّجها رَجلٌ فَماتَ عَنَْها وََلمْ يفرِضْ لَها صََداقا وََلمْ يْدخلْ بَِها فَاخْتلفُوا إَِليْهِ قرِيبا مِنْ شَْهرٍ لَا يفتِيهِمْ ثمَّ قاَل أَرَى لها صََداقَ نِسَائَِها لَا وَكسَ وَلَا شطَطَ وََلَها اْلمِيرَاثُ وَعََليها اْلعَِّدُة . فشَهَِد معْقِلُ بنُ سِنانٍ الَأشجعِيُّ أََّن رَسوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قضَى فِي بِرْوَعَ بِنْتِ وَاشِقٍ بِمِثلِ ما قَضَيتَ .

30. Provision for wife before the final divorce

Fatimah bint Qais said: “I came to the Prophet and said: ‘I am the daughter of Ali Khalid and my husband, so and so, sent word to me divorcing me. I asked his family for provision and shelter but they refused.’ They said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, he sent word to her divorcing her thrice.’” She said: “The Messenger of Allah said: ‘The woman is still entitled to provision and shelter if the husband can still take her back.’” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3403

حََّدثتنِي فاطِمَُة بِنتُ قيسٍ، قاَلتْ أتيْتُ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقلتُ أنا بِنتُ آلِ خاِلٍد وَإَِّن زَوْجي فُلانا أَرْسَلَ إَِلىَّ بِطَلَاقِي وَإِ نِي سَألتُ أَْهله النَّفقة وَالسُّكنى فَأََبوْا عََلىَّ . قاُلوا يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ إَِّنُه قد أَرْسَلَ إَِليها بِث لَاثِ تطْلِيقَاتٍ . قاَلتْ فقاَل رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم :”إَِّنمَا النفقة وَالسكْنَى لْلمَرْأَةِ إذا كَاَن لزَوْجها عََليها الرَّجْعَُة ”

31. Regarding child custody

It was narrated that Abu Maimunah said: “While I was with Abu Hurairah he said: ‘A woman came to the Messenger of Allah and said: May my father and mother be ransomed for you! My husband wants to take my son away, but he helps me, and brings me water from the well of Abu ‘Inabah. Her husband came and said: Who is going to take my son from me? The Messenger of Allah said: “O boy, this is your father and this is your mother; take the hand of whichever of them you want.” He took his mother’s hand and she left with him.’” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3496

عَنْ أبِي ميمُوَنَة، قاَل بينا أنا عِنَْد أَبِي هرَْيرََة، فَقَاَل إَِّن اْمرَأة جَاَءتْ رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَاَلتْ فداكَ أبِي وَأ مِي إَِّن زَوْجي يرِيُد أن يْذهبَ بِاْبنِي وَقد نفعَنِي وَسَقانِي مِنْ بِئْرِ أَبِي عِنَبََة . فَجَاَء زَوْجَُها وَقاَل منْ يخَاصِمُنِي فِي اْبنِي فقَاَل يا غُلامُ هَذا أبوكَ وََهذهِ أمكَ فخُْذ بِيد أَ يِهِمَا شِئْتَ ” فَأَخََذ بِيَِد أ مِهِ فَاْنطََلقتْ بِه

32. Wife giving birth few days after the husband’s death

Abu Salamah bin ‘Abdur-Rahman said: “It was said to Ibn ‘Abbas concerning a woman who gives birth one day after her husband died: ‘Can she get married?’ He said: ‘No, not until the longer of the two periods has ended.’ He said: ‘Allah says: And for those who are pregnant (whether they are divorced or their husbands are dead), their ‘Iddah (prescribed period) is until they lay down their burden.’ He said: ‘That only applies in the case of divorce.’ Abu Hurairah said: ‘I agree with my brother’s son’ –meaning, Abu Salamah. He sent his slave Kuraib and told him: ‘Go to Umm Salamah and ask her: Was this the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah?’ He came back and said: ‘Yes, Subai’ah Al-Aslamiyyah gave birth twenty days after her husband died, and the Messenger of Allah told her to get married, and Abu As-Sanabil was one of those who proposed marriage to her.’” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3511

قِيلَ لِاْبنِ عَباسٍ فِي اْمرَأةٍ وَضَعَتْ بعَْد وَفَاةِ زَوْجها بِعِشْرِينَ ليلة أيصُْلحُ لَها أن ت زوَّجَ قَاَل لَا إِلَّا آخرَ الَأجََلينِ . قاَل قلتُ قاَل اَّلُلّ تبارَكَ وََتعَاَلى } وَأُولاتُ الَأحْمَالِ أجَُلهنَّ أن يضَعْنَ حَمَْلهنَّ { فقَاَل إَِّنمَا ذلكَ فِي الطَّلَاقِ . فقاَل أبو هرَْيرََة أنا معَ اْبنِ أَخِي . يعْنِي أََبا سََلمََة . فأرْسَلَ غُلَاَمُه كرَْيبًا فقاَل اْئتِ أُمَّ سََلمة فَسَْلَها هلْ كاَن هذا سُنة مِنْ رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فجَاَء فقاَل قاَلتْ نعَمْ سُبيْعَُة الَأسلمِيَُّة وَضَعَتْ بعَْد وَفاةِ زَوْجها بِعِشْرِينَ ليلة فَأََمرََها رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أن تزَوَّجَ فكاَن أبو السنَابِلِ فِيمنْ يخْطُبها

33. Inciting a woman against her husband

Narrated Abu Hurayrah: The Prophet ()ﷺ said: Anyone who incites a woman against her husband or a slave against his master is not one of us. Sahih (Al-Albani) Sunan Abi Dawud 2175

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، قاَل قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ليْسَ مِنا منْ خَببَ اْمرَأة عََلى زَوْجَِها أَوْ عبًْدا عََلى سيِِ دهِ ”

34. Child custody before the mother gets married again

Amr b. Shu’aib on his father’s authority said that his grandfather (Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-‘As) reported: A woman said: Messenger of Allah, my womb is a vessel to this son of mine, my breasts, a waterskin for him, and my lap a guard for him, yet his father has divorced me, and wants to take him away from me. The Messenger of Allah ()ﷺ said: You have more right to him as long as you do not marry. Hasan (Al-Albani) Sunan Abi Dawud 2276

أََّن اْمرَأة، قاَلتْ يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ إَِّن اْبنِي هذا كَاَن بطْنِي لُه وِعَاًء وََثْديِي لُه سِقاًء وَحِجرِي لُه حِوَاًء وَإن أََباُه طََّلقنِي وَأرَاَد أن ينتزِعَُه مِنِ ي فقَاَل لَها رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم : أنتِ أَحقُّ بِهِ ما لمْ تنكِحي ”

35. Marrying without the permission of her Walii

Aishah narrated that: The Messenger of Allah said: “Whichever woman married without the permission of her Wali her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid. If he entered into her, then the Mahr is for her in lieu of what he enjoyed from her private part. If they disagree, then the Sultan is the Wali for one who has no Wali.” Hasan (Darussalam) Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1102

عَنْ عَائِشََة، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل أَُّيمَا اْمرَأةٍ نكِحَتْ بِغَيرِ إِذْنِ وَِليَِ ها فنِكَاحها باطِلٌ فَنكَاحَُها باطِلٌ فنِكاحَُها باطِلٌ فَِإْن دخَلَ بَِها فََلَها اْلمَْهرُ بِمَا اسْتحَلَّ مِنْ فرْجها فإنِ اشتَجرُوا فَالسُّْلطَاُن وَِليُّ منْ لَا وَِليَّ لُه ”

36. Rights of a woman over her husband

It was narrated from Hakim bin Muawiyah, from his father, that: A man asked the Prophet ()ﷺ “What are the right of the woman over her husband?” He said: “That he should feed her as he feeds himself and clothe her as he clothes himself; he should not strike her on the face nor disfigure her, and he should not abandon her except in the house (as a form of discipline).” (Hassan) Arabic : Book 9, Hadith 1923 Sunan Ibn Majah

عَنْ حَكِيمِ بنِ معَاوَِيَة، عَنْ أبِيهِ، أََّن رَجُلًا، سأََل النبِيَّ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ ما حَقُّ اْلمَرْأةِ على الزَّوْجِ قَاَل أن يطْعِمََها إِذَا طَعِمَ وَأن يكْسوََها إِذَا اكْتسَى وَلَا يضْرِبِ اْلوَجَْه وَلَا يقبِ حْ وَلَا يْهجرْ إِلَّا فِي اْلبيتِ ”

37. No woman should arrange the marriage of another woman

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah that: The Messenger of Allah said: “No woman should arrange the marriage of another woman (i.e. she needs a walii), and no woman should arrange her own marriage. The adulteress is the one who arranges her own marriage.” Sahih (Darussalam) Arabic : Book 9, Hadith 1956 Sunan Ibn Majah

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، قاَل قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ لَا تزَوِ جُ اْلمَرْأة اْلمَرْأة وَلَا تزَوِ جُ اْلمرْأَُة نفسََها فإَّن الزَّانِية هِيَ اَّلتِي تزَوِ جُ نفس ها ”

38. Burdening the husband with unnecessary expenses

It was narrated from Jabir that: The first thing that destroyed the Tribes of Israel is when the wife of a poor person would burden him for clothing or fashion like the way the wife of a rich man would burden him.’ Sahih (Albani) Silsila ahadeeth sahiha 591

وعن جابر بن عبدالله رضي الله عنه أن النبي – صلى الله عليه وسلم – قال : ) إن أول ما هلك بنو إسرائيل أن امرأة الفقير كانت تكلفه من الثياب أو الصيغ ما تكلف امرأة الغني.

F. MISCELLANEOUS متنوعة

1. Seeking knowledge together with men

Abu Hurayra reported, “A woman came to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and said, ‘Messenger of Allah! We cannot come to sit with you, so set aside a day when we can come.’ He said, ‘Your appointed place is the house of so-and-so.’ He came to the women at that time. Part of what he said to them was, ‘There is no woman among you who has three children die, resigning them to Allah, who will not enter the Garden.’ A woman said, ‘And if it is two?’ He replied, ‘And if it is two.'”

عَنْ أَبِي هرَْيرََ ة: جَاَءتِ اْمرَأة إَِلى رَسولِ الِله صلى الله عليه وسلم فقاَلتْ : يا رَسُوَل الِله، إَِّنا لَا نقدرُ عََليكَ فِي مجْلِسِكَ، فوَاعِْدَنا يوًْما نأتِكَ فِيهِ، فقَاَل : موْعُِدكُنَّ بيْتُ فلَانٍ، فجَاَءُهنَّ لَذلكَ اْل وعِْد، وَكاَن فِيمَا حََّدَثه نَّ: ما مِنكنَّ اْمرَأة يمُوتُ لَها ثلَاثٌ مِنَ اْلوََلِد، فَتَحْتسِبهمْ، إِلَّا دخََلتِ اْلجَنة، فَقاَلتِ اْمرَأٌَ ة: أَوِ اْثنا نِ؟ قاَ ل: أوَ اْثنان. Grade : Sahih (Al-Albani) Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 148

2. Spreading knowledge

Ibn Mas’ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger of Allah()ﷺ saying, “May Allah freshen the affairs of a person who hears something from us and communicates it to others exactly as he has heard it (i.e., both the meaning and the words), for it may be that the recipient of knowledge understands it better than the one who has heard it.” [At-Tirmidhi Book 13, Hadith 14]

وعن ابن مسعود رضي الله عنه قال: سمعت رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم يقول: “نضر الله امرًءا سمع منا شيئا فبلغه كما سمعه فرب مبلغ أوعي من سامع” ))رواه الترمذي وقال: حديث حسن صحيح((.

3. Pre and Post islamic women status

Narrated Ibn `Abbas: (in a long hadith that) Umar had said: “By Allah, in the Pre-lslamic Period of Ignorance we did not pay attention to women until Allah revealed regarding them what He revealed regarding them and assigned for them what He has assigned.

قَاَل عُمَرُ وَاَّلِلّ إِْن كنا فِي اْلجَاهِلِيَّةِ ما نعُُّد للن سَاِء أَْمرًا، حَتَّى أنزََل اَّلُلّ فِيهِنَّ ما أنزََل وَقسمَ لُهنَّ ما قَسَمَ . Sahih al-BukhariBook 65, Hadith 4913

4. Women as a source of knowledge

Narrated Abu Musa: “Never was a Hadith unclear to us – the Companions of the Messenger of Allah – and we asked ‘Aishah, except that we found some knowledge concerning it with her.”

عَنْ أبِي موسَى، قاَل ما أشْكلَ عليْنَا أصحابَ رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم حَِديثٌ قَطُّ فسألنَا عائِشََة إِلَّا .وَجَْدَنا عِنَْدَها مِنُْه عِْلما Grade : Hasan (Darussalam) Jami` at-Tirmidhi Book 49, Hadith 4257

5. Causing another woman’s abortion

Narrated Hisham’s father from Al-Mughira bin Shu’ba: Umar consulted the companions about the case of a woman’s abortion (caused by somebody else). Al-Mughira said: The Prophet ()ﷺ gave the verdict that a male or female slave should be given (as a Diya). Then Muhammad bin Maslama testified that he had witnessed the Prophet ()ﷺ giving such a verdict. Sahih al-Bukhari 6905

عَنْ عُمَرَ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ أنُه استَشارَُهمْ فِي إِْملاص اْلمَرْأةِ فقاَل اْلمُغِيرَُة قضَى النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم بِاْلغُرَّةِ عَبد أوْ أم ةٍ. فقاَل اْئتِ منْ يشهد معَكَ، فَشَهَِد محَمَُّد بنُ مسَْلم ة أََّنُه شَهَِد النبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَضَى بِهِ .

6. A woman who dies in childbirth is a martyr

It was narrated from ‘Uqbah bin ‘Amir that the Messenger of Allah ()ﷺ said: “There are five things, whoever dies of any of them is a martyr. The one who is killed in the cause of Allah is a martyr; the one who dies of an abdominal complaint in the cause of Allah is a martyr; the one who dies of the plague in the cause of Allah is a martyr; and the woman who dies in childbirth in the cause of Allah is a martyr.” Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3163

عَنْ عُقبة بنِ عَامِرٍ، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل : خَمْسٌ منْ قبِضَ فِي شَىء مِنُْهنَّ فهوَ شهِيٌد اْلمقْتوُل فِي سَبِيلِ اَّلِلّ شَهِيٌد وَاْلغَرِقُ فِي سبِي لِ اَّلِلّ شهِيٌد وَاْلمَبطُوُن فِي سَبِيلِ اَّلِلّ شَهِيٌد وَاْلمَطعُوُن فِي سَبِيلِ اَّلِلّ شهيٌد وَالنفسَاُء فِي سَبِيلِ اَّلِلّ شَهِيٌ د ”

Alhamdulilah this is the end of our series on ‘100 hadiths on women’. For better understanding of these hadiths, refer to a sheikh or scholar who can give you more clarifications concerning the hadiths.

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Deen (Religion)

100 HADITHS ON WOMEN (PART 4)

By Khalid Fauz Abdalla November 30, 2019

Image Courtesy: https://dlpng.com/png/5781665

You may read part 3 at: https://lubnah.me.ke/100-hadiths-on-women-part-3/

D. GENERAL BEHAVIOR كتاب الأدب

1. Looking at private parts of another

Abu Sa’id Al-Khudri (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) said, “A man must not look at a man’s private parts nor must a woman look at a woman’s private parts; neither should two men lie naked under one cover, nor should two women lie naked under the same cover.” [Muslim].

وعن أبي سعيد رضي الله عنه أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: “لا ينظر الرجل إلى عورة الرجل، ولا المرأة إلى عورة المرأة، ولا يفضي الرجل إلى الرجل في ثوب واحد، ولا تفضي المرأة إلى المرأة في ثوب واحد”

رواه مسلم

2. Women walking with men in the street

Narrated AbuUsayd al-Ansari: AbuUsayd heard the Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) say when he was coming out of the mosque, and men and women were mingled in the road: Draw back, for you must not walk in the middle of the road; keep to the sides of the road. Then women were keeping so close to the wall that their garments were rubbing against it. {Grade : Hasan (Al-Albani)}

عَنْ حَمْزََة بنِ أبِي أسَيد الَأْنصَارِيِ ، عنْ أَبِيهِ، أََّنه سمِعَ رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم يقُوُل وَُهوَ خَارِجٌ مِنَ اْلمَسْجد فاخْتلطَ الرِ جَاُل معَ النِ ساِء فِي الطرِيقِ فَقَاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم للنِ ساِء ” استَأْخرَْن فَِإنُه ليسَ لكنَّ أن تحْققنَ الطَّرِيقَ عليْكُنَّ بِحافَاتِ الطَّرِيقِ ” . فكاَنتِ اْلمَرْأة تْلتَصِقُ بِاْلجَِدارِ حَتى إن ثوَْبَها ليتعََّلقُ بِاْلجدارِ مِنْ لصُوقَِها بِهِ

3. Entering Bathhouses

It was narrated from Abu Malih AL-Hudhail that some women from the people of Hims asked permission to enter upon Aisha. She said: “Perhaps you are among those (women) who enter bathhouses? I heard the Messenger of Allahﷺsay: ‘Any woman who takes off her clothes anywhere but in her husband’s house, has torn the screen between her and Allah.'” {Sunan Ibn Majah 3750 Hasan (Darussalam)}

عَنْ أبِي اْلمَلِيحِ اْلُهذليِ ، أن نِسوًَة، مِنْ أَْهلِ حمصَ اسْتأذََّن عََلى عَائِشََة فقاَلتْ لعََّلكُنَّ مِنَ الَّلوَاتِي يدخُْلنَ اْلحَمَّاَماتِ سَمِعْتُ رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ يقوُل ” أيمَا اْمرَأَةٍ وَضَعَتْ ثِيَاَبَها فِي غيْرِ بيتِ زَوْجها فقد هتكَتْ سِترَ ما بينها وََبيْنَ اَّلِلّ ”

4. Ingratitude

Asma’ was heard to say that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, passed by a group of women sitting down in the mosque. He said to the salam with his hand and said, “Beware of the ingratitude of those with blessings. Beware of the ingratitude of those with blessings.” One of them said, “We seek refuge with Prophet, Prophet of Allah, from ingratitude for the blessings of Allah.” He said, “Yes. One of you women might have been without a husband for a long time (and then Allah provides her with one) and she becomes angry and says, ‘By Allah, I have never seen a hour of good from you. That is ingratitude for the blessings of Allah. That is the ingratitude of those with blessings.'” {Sahih (Al-Albani) Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 1047}

عَنْ شَْه رٍ قاَ ل: سَمِعْ تُ أسْمَاَء،أََّنالنَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم مرَّفِي اْلمَسْجد،وَعُصْبة مِنَ النِ ساِءقعُوٌد،قَال بِيد هِ إَِليهِ نَّ بِالسَّلَامِ،فقاَ ل: إَِّياكُ نَّ وَكُفرَاَ ن اْلمنعِمِينَ ، إَِّياكنَّ وَكفرَان اْلمُنعِمِينَ،قاَلتْ إِحداُهنَّ : نعُوذُ بِاَّلِلّ ياَنبِ يَّ الِله مِ نْ كفرَان نِعَ مِ الِله،قاَل : بَلى إَِّن إِحَْداكُنَّ تطُوُ ل أَْيمَتها،ثمَّ تغْضَ بُ اْلغَضْبََة فَتَقُوُل :وَاَّلِلّ مارَأَْي تُ مِنه سَاعًَ ة خَيرًا قطُّ، فذلكَ كفْرَان نِعَ مِ الِله، وَذلكَ كفْرَاُن نِعَمِ اْلمنعِمِينَ

5. Shaking hands with opposite sex

Muhammad bin Munkadir said that he heard Umaimah bint Ruqaiqah say: “I came to the Prophet(ﷺ) with some other women, to offer our pledge to him. He said to us: ‘(I accept your pledge) with regard to what you are able to do. But I do not shake hands with women.’” {Sahih (Darussalam) Sunan Ibn Majah2874}

سمِعَ محَمََّد بنَ اْلمُنكدرِ، قاَل سمِعْتُ أَُميْمََة بِنتَ رُقَيْقة، تقوُل جئتُ النبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فِي نِسْوَةٍ نبَايِعُُه فقَاَل لنا ” فِيمَا اسْتَطعْتُنَّ وَأطقْتُنَّ إ نِي لَا أُصَافِحُ النِ سَاَء ”

6. Women and leadership

Narrated Abu Bakra: During the battle of Al-Jamal, Allah benefited me with a Word (I heard from the Prophet). When the Prophet heard the news that the people of the Persia had made the daughter of Khosrau their Queen (ruler), he said, “Never will succeed such a nation as makes a woman their ruler.” {Sahih al-Bukhari 7099}

عَنْ أبَيِ بَكْرَةَ ،قاَلَ لَقدَْ نَفَعنَيِ الل بِكَلِمَةٍ أيَاَّمَ الْجَمَلِ لَمَّا بَلَغَ النبَّيَِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أنََّ فاَرِسًا مَلكَُّوا ابْنةََ كِسْرَى قاَلَ ” لنَْ يفُْلِحَ قوَْمٌ وَلوَّْا أمَْرَهُمُ امْرَأةًَ “

7. Regarding why women are deficient in intelligence and religion

Narrated Abu Sa`id Al-Khudri: Once Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) went out to the Musalla (to offer the prayer) of `Id-al-Adha or Al-Fitr prayer. Then he passed by the women and said, “O women! Give alms, as I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-fire were you (women).” They asked, “Why is it so, O Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) “? He replied, “You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands. I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. A cautious sensible man could be led astray by some of you.” The women asked, “O Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) !What is deficient in our intelligence and religion?” He said, “Is not the evidence of two women equal to the witness of one man?” They replied in the affirmative. He said, “This is the deficiency in her intelligence. Isn’t it true that a woman can neither pray nor fast during her menses?” The women replied in the affirmative. He said, “This is the deficiency in her religion.” {Sahih al-Bukhari 304}

عَنْ أبِي سَعِيٍد اْلخُْدرِيِ ، قاَل خَرَجَ رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فِي أضْحًى ـ أوْ فِطْرٍ ـ إَِلى اْلمُصلى، فَمرَّ عََلى النِ سَاِء فقاَل يا معْشَرَ النِ ساِء تصدقْنَ، فَِإ نِي أُرِيتكنَّ أكثرَ أهلِ النارِ “. فَقُْلنَ وَبِمَ يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ قَاَل ” تكثِرَْن الَّلعْنَ، وََتكفرَْن اْلعَشِيرَ، ما رَأَْيتُ مِنْ نا قِصَاتِ عَقلٍ وَِدينٍ أَذَْهبَ لُلبِ الرَّجلِ اْلحَازِمِ مِنْ إِحَْداكنَّ “. قلنَ وََما نقصَاُن دينِنَا وَعقلِنَا يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ قاَل ” أليْسَ شََهاَدُة اْلمَرْأةِ مِثْلَ نِصفِ شهاَدةِ الرَّجُلِ “. قلنَ بَلى. قاَل ” فذلكَ مِنْ نقصانِ عَقْلَِها، أََليسَ إِذَا حَاضَتْ لمْ تصَلِ وََلمْ تصمْ “. قلنَ بَلى. قَاَل ” فََذلكَ مِنْ نقصَانِ دينَِها “

8. Turning effeminate men and women out of your houses

Narrated Ibn `Abbas: The Prophet (ﷺ) cursed effeminate men (those men who are in the similitude (assume the manners of women) and those women who assume the manners of men, and he said, “Turn them out of your houses .” The Prophet (ﷺ) turned out such-and-such man, and `Umar turned out such and-such woman. {Sahih al-Bukhari 5886}

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، قاَل لعَنَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم اْلمُخَنثِينَ مِنَ الرِ جَالِ، وَاْلمُترَج لَاتِ مِنَ النِ ساِء وَقَاَل ”أَخرِجوُهمْ مِنْ بيوتِكمْ قاَل فأخْرَجَ النبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فُلَاًنا، وَأَخْرَجَ عمرُ فُلانا .

9. Why most women are fuel for hell-fire

Jabir b. ‘Abdullah reported: I observed prayer with the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) on the ‘Id day. He commenced with prayer before the sermon without Adhan and Iqama. He then stood up leaning on Bilal, and he commanded (them) to be on guard (against evil for the sake of) Allah, and he exhorted (them) on obedience to Him, and he preached to the people and admonished them. He then walked on till he came to the women and preached to them and admonished them, and asked them to give alms, for most of them are the fuel for Hell. A woman having a dark spot on the cheek stood up and said: Why is it so, Messenger of Allah? He said: For you grumble often and show ingratitude to your spouse. And then they began to give alms out of their ornaments such as their earrings and rings which they threw on to the cloth of Bilal. { Sahih Muslim 885 b}

عَنْ جَابِرِ بنِ عَبد اَّلِلّ، قاَل شَهِْدتُ معَ رَسولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم الصَّلَاَة يوْمَ اْلعِيِد فبََدأَ بِالصلَاةِ قَبلَ اْلخُطْبةِ بِغَيرِ أذَانٍ وَلَا إِقاَمةٍ ثمَّ قَامَ متَوَكِ ئًا عََلى بِلَالٍ فأمرَ بِتقوَى اَّلِلّ وَحَثَّ عََلى طاعتِهِ وَوَعظَ الناسَ وَذَكَّرَُهمْ ثمَّ مضَى حَتى أتى النِ سَاَء فَوَعظهنَّ وَذكَّرَُهنَّ فَقَاَل تصََّدقنَ فإَّن أكثرَكنَّ حَطَبُ جهنَّمَ فقاَمتْ اْمرَأٌَة مِنْ سِطَةِ النِ سَاِء سَفعَاُء اْلخََّدْينِ فقاَلتْ لمَ يا رَسوَل اَّلِلّ قَاَل لَأَّنكنَّ تكثِرَْن الشَّكاَة وََتكفرَْن اْلعَشِيرَ قَاَل فَجَعَْلنَ يتَصََّدقْنَ مِنْ حُلِي هِنَّ يْلقِينَ فِي ثوْبِ بَِلالٍ مِنْ أقْرِطَتِهِنَّ وَخَوَاتِمِهِنَّ

10. Wailing women

Abu Malik al-Ash’ari reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as saying: Among my people there are four characteristics belonging to pre-Islamic period which they do not abandon: boasting of high rank, reviling other peoples’ genealogies, seeking rain by stars, and wailing. And he (further) said: If the wailing woman does not repent before she dies, she will be made to stand on the Day of Resurrection wearing a garment of pitch and a chemise of mange. {Sahih Muslim 934}

أََبا ماِلكٍ الَأشْعَرِيَّ حََّدَثُه أن النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَاَل أرَْبعٌ فِي أمتِي مِنْ أمرِ اْلجاهِلِيَّةِ لَا يتْرُكُوَنهنَّ اْلفَخْرُ فِي الَأحْسَابِ وَالطَّعْنُ فِي الَأْنسابِ وَالِاستِسْقَاُء بِالنُّجُومِ وَالنِ ياحَُة ” . وَقاَل ” النَّائِحة إِذَا لمْ تتُبْ قب لَ موْتَِها تقامُ يوْمَ اْلقِيَاَمةِ وَعليَْها سِرَْباٌل مِنْ قطِرَانٍ وَِدرْعٌ مِنْ جَرَبٍ ”

11. The best woman

Narrated Abu Hurairah: It was narrated that Abu Hurairah said: “It was said to the Messenger of Allah: ‘Which woman is best?’ He said: ‘The one who makes him happy when he looks at her, obeys him when he commands her, and she does not go against his wishes with regard to herself nor her wealth.’” {Hasan (Darussalam) Sunan an-Nasa’i 3231}

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، قاَل قِيلَ لرَسُولِ اَّ لِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أىُّ النِ سَاِء خَيرٌ قَاَل اَّلتِي تسرُُّه إِذَا نظَرَ وَُتطِيعُُه إِذَا أمرَ وَلَا تخَاِلفه فِي نفسَِها وََماِلَها بِما يكْرَُه ”

12. A woman is forbidden to shave her head

Ali narrated: “The Messenger of Allah prohibited that a woman should shave her head.” {Hasan (Darussalam) Jami` at-Tirmidhi 914 }

عَنْ عَلِيٍ ، قاَل نَهى رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم أَْن تحْلِقَ اْلمَرْأة رَأسََها .

13. Rewards of a good wife

Umm Salamah narrated that The Messenger of Allah said: “Whichever woman dies while her husband is pleased with her, then she enters Paradise.” {Hasan (Darussalam) Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1161}

عَنْ أمِ سََلمََة، قاَلتْ قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم “أيمَا اْمرَأةٍ ماَتتْ وَزَوْجَُها عَنها رَاٍض دخلتِ اْلجَنة

14. Protective jealousy

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah that: The Messenger of Allah said: “There is a kind of protective jealousy that Allah loves and a kind that Allah hates. As for that which Allah loves, it is protective jealousy when there are grounds for suspicion. And as for that which He hates, it is protective jealousy when there are no grounds for suspicion.” {Sahih (Darussalam) Arabic : Book 9, Hadith 2074 Sunan Ibn Majah }

أَبي هرَْيرََة، قاَل قَاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ ـ صلى الله عليه وسلم ـ “مِنَ اْلغَيرَةِ ما يحبُّ اَّلُلّ وَمِنها ما يكْرَُه اَّلُلّ فَأََّما ما يحبُّ فاْلغَيرَُة فِي الرِ يبةِ وَأما ما يكْرَُه فَاْلغَيرَُة فِي غَيرِ رِيبةٍ

To be continued…

Deen (Religion)

100 HADITHS ON WOMEN (PART 3)

By Khalid Fauz Abdalla November 16, 2019

Image Courtesy: https://www.freepik.com/

You may read part 2 at: http://lubnah.me.ke/100-hadiths-on-women-part-2/

C. ACTS OF WORSHIP كتاب العبادات

1. What Has Been Narrated Concerning Women Leaving (Their House) For The Masjid

Ibn ‘Umar reported the Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) as saying; Do not prevent your women from visiting the mosque; but their houses are better for them (for praying).

“عَنِ اْبنِ عُمَرَ، قاَل قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” لَا تمْنعُوا نِسَاَءكمُ اْلمَسَاجد وَُبيُوُتُهنَّ خيْرٌ لهنَّ ”
Grade : Sahih (Al-Albani)

2. Friday Prayer

Narrated Ibn `Umar:
One of the wives of `Umar (bin Al-Khattab) used to offer the Fajr and the `Isha’ prayer in
congregation in the Mosque. She was asked why she had come out for the prayer as she knew that `Umar disliked it, and he has great ghaira (self-respect). She replied, “What prevents him from stopping me from this act?” The other replied, “The statement of Allah’s Messenger(ﷺ)’ :Do not stop Allah’s women-slaves from going to Allah’s Mosques’ prevents him.”

عَنِ اْبنِ عُمَرَ، قاَل كاَنتِ اْمرَأٌَة لعُمَرَ تشهد صَلاة الصُّبحِ وَاْلعِشَاِء فِي اْلجَمَاعَةِ فِي اْلمَسجِِد، فقِيلَ لها لمَ تخْرُجينَ وَقد تعَْلمِينَ أن عُمَرَ يكْرَُه ذَِلكَ وََيغَارُ قَاَلتْ وََما يمْنعُُه أن ينهانِي
قاَل يمْنَعُُه قَوُْل رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” لَا تمْنَعُوا إَِماَء اَّلِلّه مسَاجد اَّ لِلّه

Sahih al-Bukhari 900

3. Woman traveling alone, even to hajj

Narrated Ibn `Abbas:
The Prophet said, “A woman should not travel except with a Dhu-Mahram (her husband or a man with whom that woman cannot marry at all according to the Islamic Jurisprudence), and no man may visit her except in the presence of a Dhu-Mahram.” A man got up and said, “O Allah’s Messenger I intend to go to such and such an army and my wife wants to perform Hajj.” The Prophetsaid (to him), “Go along with her (to Hajj).

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ قاَل قَاَل النبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ” لَا تسَافِرِ اْلمَرْأة إِلَّا معَ ذي محْرَمٍ، وَلَا يْدخُلُ عََل يها رَجُلٌ إِلَّا وََمعََها محرَمٌ “. فَقَاَل رَجُلٌ يا رَسُوَل
اَّلِلّ إِ نِي أرِيُد أن أخرُجَ جَيْشِ كذا وَكذا، وَاْمرَأتِي ترِيُد اْلحَجَّ . فَقَاَل ” اخرُجْ معََها

Sahih al-Bukhari 1862

4. The Tawaf of women and men

Ibn Juraij said, “ `Ata informed us that when Ibn Hisham forbade women to perform Tawaf with men he said to him, ‘How do you forbid them while the wives of the Prophet(ﷺ) used to perform Tawaf with the men?’ I said, ‘Was this before decreeing of the use of the veil or after it? `Ata took an oath and said, ‘I saw it after the order of veil.’ I said, ‘How did they mix with the men?’ `Ata said, ‘The women never mixed with the men, and `A’ishah used to perform Tawaf separately and never mixed with men. Once it happened that `A’ishah was performing the Tawaf and woman said to her, ‘O Mother of believers! Let us touch the Black stone.’ `A’ishah said to her, ‘Go yourself,’ and she herself refused to do so. The wives of the Prophet(ﷺ) used to come out in night, in disguise and used to perform Tawaf with men. But whenever they intended to enter the Ka`bah, they would stay outside till the men had gone out. I and `Ubaid bin `Umair used to visit `A’ishah while she was residing at JaufThabir.” I asked, “What was her veil?” `Ata said, “She was wearing an old Turkish veil, and that was the only thing (veil) which was screen between us and her. I saw a pink cover on her.”

قَاَل اْبنُ جُرَْيجٍ أخْبرََنا قاَل أخبَرَنِي عطاٌء، إذْ منعَ اْبنُ هِشَامٍ النِ سَاَء الطَّ وَافَ معَ الرِ جالِ قاَل كَيفَ يمْنَعُُهنَّ، وَقد طَافَ نِسَاُء النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم معَ الرِ جَالِ قلتُ أبعَْد اْلحجَابِ أوْ قَبْلُ قَاَل إِي لعَمرِي لقَْد أدرَكته بعَْد اْلحجَابِ . قلتُ كيْفَ يخاِلطنَ الرِ جَاَل قَاَل لمْ يكنَّ يخَاِلطْنَ كاَنتْ عَائِشة ـ رضى الله عنها ـ تطُوفُ حَجْرًَة مِنَ الرِ جَالِ لَا تخَاِلطُُهمْ، فقَاَلتِ اْمرَأٌَة اْنطَلِقِي نسْتلِمْ يا أمَّ اْلمُؤْمِنِي نَ. قاَلتْ }اْنطلِقِي{ عَنْ كِ. وَأب تْ. }وَكنَّ { يخْرُج نَ متنكِ رَاتٍ بِالَّليْلِ، فَيطُفْنَ معَ الرِ جَالِ، وََلكِنهنَّ كنَّ إِذَا دخلنَ اْلبَيْتَ قمْنَ حَتى يْدخُْلنَ وَأخْرِجَ الرِ جَاُل، وَكنتُ آتِي عائِشة أنا وَعُبيد بنُ عُمَيرٍ وَهِيَ مجَاوِرٌَة فِي جَوْفِ ثبِيرٍ . قلتُ وََما حِجَاُبَها قاَل هِيَ فِي قبةٍ ترْكِيةٍ لَها غِشاٌء، وََما بيْننا وََبينها غَيرُ
ذَِلكَ، وَرَأيتُ عليَْها درْعا موَرًَّدا

Sahih al-Bukhari 1618

5. Getting the attention of the Imam

Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet(ﷺ) said, “The saying ‘Sub Han Allah’ is for men and clapping is for women.” (If something happens in the prayer, the men can invite the attention of the Imam by saying “Sub Han Allah”. And women, by clapping their hands).

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة ـ رضى الله عنه ـ عنِ النَّبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل ” التَّسْبِيحُ للرِ جالِ وَالتصْفِيقُ للن سَاِء

Sahih al-Bukhari 1203

6. Wearing niqab and gloves while in ihram

Ibn ‘Umar reported that the Prophet( )ﷺas saying A woman in the sacred state (wearing ihram) must not be veiled or wear gloves.
عَنِ اْبنِ عُمَرَ، عَنِ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل ” اْلمُحْرَِمُة لَا تنتقِبُ وَلَا تْلبسُ اْلقفازَْينِ

Grade : Sahih (Al-Albani) SunanAbiDawud 1826

7. Permission For Women To Go Out To The ‘Id Prayer And Attend The Khutbah, Separated From The Men

Umm ‘Atiyya reported:
The Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) commanded us to bring out on’Id-ul-Fitr and ‘Id-ul-Adha young women, menstruating women and purdah-observing ladies, menstruating women kept back from prayer, but participated in goodness and supplication of the Muslims. I said: Messenger of Allah, one of us does not have an outer garment (to cover her face and body). He said: Let her sister cover her with her outer garment.

عَنْ أمِ عَطِية، قَاَلتْ أمرََنا رَسُوُل اَّلِلّه صلى الله عليه وسلم أن نخْرِجَُهنَّ فِي اْلفِطْرِ وَالَأضحى اْلعَوَاتِقَ وَاْلحُيضَ وَذَوَاتِ اْلخُُدورِ فأما اْلحُيضُ فيَعْتَزِْلنَ الصلَاَة وََيشَْهْدن اْلخَيرَ وََدعْوََة
اْلمُسْلِمِينَ . قلتُ يا رَسوَل اَّلِلّ إحَْداَنا لَا يكوُن لَها جلبابٌ قاَل ” لتلبِسها أُختَُها مِنْ جِْلبابَِها

Sahih Muslim 890 c

8. Conditions before going to mosque

‘Amra, daughter of Abd al-Rahmin, reported:
I heard ‘A’isha, the wife of the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) .Say: If the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) had seen what new things the women have introduced (in their way of life) he would have definitely prevented them from going to the mosque, as the women of BaniIsra’il were prevented.

عنْ عَمْرََة بِنتِ عَبد الرَّحْمَنِ، أنَها سمِعَتْ عَائِشََة، زَوْجَ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم تقوُل لوْ أََّن رَسوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم رَأى ما أحَْدثَ النِ ساُء لمَنَعَُهنَّ اْلمسْجد كمَا منِعَتْ
نِسَاُء بنِي إِسْرَائِيلَ . قاَل فقلتُ لعَمرََة أنِسَاُء بنِي إِسْرَائِيلَ منِعْنَ اْلمَسجَِد قَاَلتْ نعَمْ

Sahih Muslim 445 a

9. Excessive worship

Narrated ‘Aisha:
Once the Prophet (ﷺ) came while a woman was sitting with me. He said, “Who is she?” I replied, “She is so and so,” and told him about her (excessive) praying. He said disapprovingly, “Do (good) deeds which is within your capacity (without being overtaxed) as Allah does not get tired (of giving rewards) but (surely) you will get tired and the best deed (act of Worship) in the sight of Allah is that which is done regularly.”

عَنْ عَائِشََة، أن النبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم دخلَ عََليَْها وَعِندَها اْمرَأة قاَل منْ هذهِ “. قاَلتْ فلَاَنُة . تذكُرُ مِنْ صَلَاتَِ ها. قاَل ” مْه، عََليكمْ بِمَا تطِيقوَن، فَوَاَّلِلّ لَا يمَلُّ اَّلُلّ حَتى
تمَُّلوا “. وَكاَن أَحبَّ الِ دينِ إَِليْهِ ما دامَ عََليهِ صَاحبه

Sahih al-Bukhari 43

10. Missing prayer while on menstrual period

Narrated Mu`adha:
A woman asked `Aisha, “Should I offer the prayers that which I did not offer because of menses” `Aisha said, “Are you from the Huraura’ (a town in Iraq?) We were with the Prophet (ﷺ) and used to get our periods but he never ordered us to offer them (the Prayers missed during menses).” `Aisha perhaps said, “We did not offer them.”
Sahih al-Bukhari

حََّدَثنا موسَى بنُ إِسْمَاعِيلَ، قاَل حدَثنَا همَّامٌ، قَاَل حََّدَثنا قتاَدُة، قاَل حََّدَثتنِي معَاذَُة، أن اْمرَأًَة، قَاَلتْ لعَائِ شة أََتجْزِي إِحَْداَنا صَلَاَتَها إِذَا طهرَتْ فقاَلتْ أَحَرُورَِّيٌة أنتِ كنا نحيضُ معَ النَّبِيِ
صلى الله عليه وسلم فَلَا يأمرَُنا بِهِ. أَوْ قاَلتْ فلَا نفْعَُله

11. Disrupting prayer

a. Narrated `Aisha:
The things which annul prayer were mentioned before me (and those were): a dog, a donkey and a woman. I said, “You have compared us (women) to donkeys and dogs. By Allah! I saw the Prophet (ﷺ) praying while I used to lie in (my) bed between him and the Qibla. Whenever I was in need of something, I disliked to sit and trouble the Prophet. So, I would slip away by the side of his feet.”
Sahih al-Bukhari 514

عن عَائِشََة، ذُكِرَ عِندَها ما يقطعُ الصلَاَة اْلكَْلبُ وَاْلحمَارُ وَاْلمَرْأة فقاَلتْ شَبَّْهتمُوَنا بِاْلحمُرِ وَاْلكِلابِ، وَاَّلِلّ لقَْد رَأيتُ النبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم يص لِي، وَإ نِي عََلى السَّرِيرِ ـ بينه
وََبينَ اْلقِبَْلةِ ـ مضطجِعًَة فَتبدو لي اْلحَاجَُة، فأكرَُه أن أجْلِسَ فَأُوِذيَ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فأنسَلُّ مِنْ عِند رِجَْليْهِ

b. Narrated `Urwa:
The Prophet (ﷺ) prayed while `Aisha was lying between him and his Qibla on the bed on which they used to sleep.
Sahih al-Bukhari 384

عَنْ عُرْوََة، أن النبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم كَاَن يصَ لِي وَعَائِشَُة معْترِضٌَة بينه وََبينَ اْلقِبَْلةِ على اْلفِرَاشِ اَّلِذي يناَمانِ عََليهِ

12. Performing hajj on behalf of your unable father

Narrated Ibn `Abbas:
A woman from the tribe of Khath’am asked for the verdict of Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) ( regarding something) during Hajjat-ul-Wada` while Al-Fadl bin `Abbas was the companion-rider behind Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) .She asked, “Allah’s ordained obligation (i.e. compulsory Hajj) enjoined on His slaves has become due on my old father who cannot sit firmly on the riding animal. Will it be sufficient if I perform the Hajj on his behalf?” He said, “Yes.”
Sahih al-Bukhari 4399

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ أن اْمرَأًَة، مِنْ خَثعَمَ اسْتفتتْ رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فِي حجةِ اْلوََداعِ وَاْلفضْلُ بنُ عَباسٍ رَِديفُ رَسُولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَاَلتْ
يا رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ إَِّن فرِيضََة اَّلِلّ عََلى عِبَاِدهِ أَْدرَكَتْ أَبِي شَيخًا كبِيرًا لَا يسْتطِيعُ أن يستَوِيَ على الر احلةِ، فََهلْ يقضِي أن أحُجَّ عَنه قَاَل : نعَمْ

13. Fasting in the presence of your husband Narrated Abu Huraira:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “A woman should not fast (optional fasts) except with her husband’s permission if he is at home (staying with her).
Sahih al-Bukhari 5192

عَنْ أبِي هرَْيرََة، عَنِ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم “لَا تصُومُ اْلمَرْأة وََبعُْلها شَاهٌِد إِلَّا بِِإذْنِهِ

14. Performing hajj on behalf of your deceased mother

Narrated Ibn `Abbas:
A woman came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said, “My mother vowed to perform the Hajj but she died before performing it. Should I perform the Hajj on her behalf?” He said, “Yes! Perform the Hajj on her behalf. See, if your mother had been in debt, would you have paid her debt?” She said, “Yes.” He said, “So you should pay what is for Him as Allah has more right that one should fulfill one’s obligations to Him. “
Sahih al-Bukhari 7315

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، أن اْمرَأة، جَاَءتْ إَِلى النَّبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقاَلتْ إَِّن أ مِي نَذرَتْ أن تحجَّ فمَاَتتْ قَبلَ أَْن تحُجَّ أفأحُجَّ عَنها قاَل نعَمْ حج ي عنَْها، أَرَأَْيتِ لوْ كَاَن عََلى
أمِكِ دْينٌ أكنتِ قاضِيتَُه “. قاَلتْ نعَمْ . فَقَاَل فاقضُوا اَّلِذي لُه، فَِإَّن اَّلَلّ أحقُّ بِاْلوَفاِء

15. Repaying missed prayers while on menses

Mu’adha reported:
A woman asked ‘A’isha: Should one amongst us complete prayers abandoned during the period of menses? ‘A’isha said: Are you a Haruriya? When any one of us during the time of the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) was in her menses (and abandoned prayer) she was not required to complete them.
Sahih Muslim 335 a

عَنْ معَاذََة، أن اْمرَأة، سَألتْ عائِشة فقاَلتْ أََتقْضِي إِحَْداَنا الصَّلَاَة أيا مَ محِيضَِها فَقاَلتْ عائِشة أَحَرُورَِّية أَْنتِ قد كاَنتْ إِحَْداَنا تحيضُ عََلى عهد رَسولِ اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ثمَّ لَا
تؤَْمرُ بِقضَاٍء

16. Standing formation when praying with opposite gender

Abdullah b. Al-Mukhtar heard Musa b. Anas narrating on the authority of Anas b. Malik that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) led him, his mother or his aunt in prayer. He made me, stand on his right side and made the woman stand, behind us.
Sahih Muslim 660 b

عَنْ أنَسَِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ، أنََّ رَسُولَ الل صلى الله عليه وسلم صَلىَّ بهِِ وَبِأ مُِهِ أوَْ خَالتَهِِ . قاَلَ فأَقَاَمَنيِ عَنْ يمَِينهِِ وَأقَاَمَ الْمَرْأةََ خَلْفنَاَ

17. Repaying fasts of a deceased relative

Ibn ‘Abbas (Allah be pleased with both of them) reported:
A woman came to the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and said: My mother has died, and fasts of a month are due from her. Thereupon he said: Don’t you see that if debt was due from her, would you not pay it? She said: Yes (I would pay on her behalf). Thereupon he said: The debt of Allah deserves its payment more than (the payment of anyone else).
Sahih Muslim 1148 a

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، – رضى الله عنهما – أن اْمرَأة، أََتتْ رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فقَاَلتْ إَِّن أ مِي ماَتتْ وَعََليها صَوْمُ شَْ هرٍ . فقاَل أرَأَْيتِ لوْ كَاَن عليها دينٌ أَكُنت
تقْضِينه ” . قاَلتْ نعَمْ . قَاَل ” فََدْينُ اَّلِلّ أَحَقُّ بِاْلقضَاِء

18. Umrah in ramadhan equals to Hajj

Ataa reported:
I heard Ibn Abbas (Allah be pleased with him) narrating to us that Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said to a woman of the Ansar (Ibn Abbas had mentioned her name but I have forgotten it): ‘What has prevented you that you do not perform Hajj along with us? She said: We have only two camels for carrying water. One of the camels has been taken by my husband and my son for performing Hajj and one has been left for us for carrying water, whereupon he (the Holy Prophet) said: So when the month of Ramadan come, perform Umra, for’Umra in this (month) is equal to Hajj (in reward). Sahih Muslim 1255 b

عَطَاٌء، قاَل سَمِعْتُ اْبنَ عَباسٍ، يح دثنَا قاَل قاَل رَسُوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم لِاْمرَأةٍ مِنَ الَأْنصارِ سمَّاَها اْبنُ عَبَّاسٍ فنسِيتُ اسْمََها ما منعَكِ أن تحُجِ ي معَنَا ” . قَاَلتْ لمْ
يكنْ لنا إِلَّا ناضِحَانِ فحجَّ أَُبو وََلِدَها وَاْبنها عََلى ناضِحٍ وََترَكَ لنا ناضِحا ننْضِحُ عليهِ قَاَل ” فإذَا جَاَء رََمضَاُن فاعْتمِرِي فَِإَّن عمْرًَة فِيهِ تعِْدُل حَجًَّة

19. Hajj for children and rewards for the parent

It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbas that:
The Messenger of Allah passed by a woman when she was in her seclusion and had a child with her.
She said: “Is there Hajj for this one?’’ He said: “Yes, and you will be rewarded.’’
Sahih (Darussalam)
Sunan an-Nasa’i 2649

عَنِ اْبنِ عَباسٍ، أن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم مرَّ بِاْمرَأةٍ وَهِيَ فِي خدرَِها معََها صَبِيٌّ فقاَلتْ ألَهذا حَجٌّ قَاَل “نعَمْ وََلكِ أجْرٌ

20. A woman gifting from her wealth

It was narrated from ‘Amr bin Shu’aib, from his father, from his grandfather, that the Messenger of Allah said:“It is not permissible for a woman to give a gift from her wealth, once her husband has marital authority over her.” This is the wording of (one of the narrators) Muhammad.
Hasan (Darussalam)
Sunan an-Nasa’i 3756

عَنْ عَمْرِو بنِ شُعَيبٍ، عَنْ أبِيهِ، عنْ ج دهِ، أََّن رَسُوَل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل : لَا يجُوزُ لِاْمرَأةٍ هِبٌَة فِي ماِلَها إِذَا مَلكَ زَوْجَُها عِصْمَتها

21. Giving charity from household foodstuff

Narrated `Aisha:
Allah’s Messenger ()ﷺ said, “When a woman gives in charity some of the foodstuff (which she has in her house) without spoiling it, she will receive the reward for what she has spent, and her husband will receive the reward because of his earning, and the storekeeper will also have a reward similar to it. The reward of one will not decrease the reward of the others . “
Sahih al-Bukhari 1425

عَنْ عَائِشََة ـ رضى الله عنها ـ قاَلتْ قاَل رَسوُل اَّلِلّ صلى الله عليه وسلم إِذَا أنفقتِ اْلمَرأة مِنْ طَعَامِ بيتَِها غَيْرَ مفسَِدةٍ كاَن لَها أجْرَُها بِمَا أَْنفقتْ وَِلزَوْجها أَجْرُُه بِمَا كسَبَ، وَِلْلخَازِنِ
مِثلُ ذَِلكَ، لَا ينْقصُ بعْضُُهمْ أَجْرَ بعٍْض شَيئا

22. Giving charity without the husband’s permission

Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet ()ﷺ said, “If a woman gives something (i.e. in charity) from her husband’s earnings without his permission, she will get half his reward.” Sahih al-Bukhari 2066

عَنْ همَّامٍ، قاَل سَمِعْتُ أبا هرَْيرََة ـ رضى الله عنه ـ عَنِ النبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قاَل إِذَا أَْنفقتِ اْلمرْأَُة مِنْ كسْبِ زَوْجها عَنْ غَيرِ أمرِهِ، فََله نِصفُ أجرِهِ

23. A woman’s prayer is better in her house and best in her private chamber

“Abd Allah (b. Mas’ud) reported the prophet (ﷺ) as saying; it is more excellent for a woman to pray in her house than in her courtyard, and more excellent for her to pray in her private chamber than in her house.
Sahih (Al-Albani)
SunanAbiDawud 570

عَنْ عَبد اَّلِلّ، عَنِ النَّبِيِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قال صَلاة اْلمَرْأةِ فِي بيتَِها أفضَلُ مِنْ صَلَاتَِها فِي حجرَتَِها وَصَلَاُتَها فِي مخَْدعَِها أفضَلُ مِنْ صَلَاتَِها فِي بيْتَِها

To be continued…

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