I think one of the scariest things in this life is that our daily actions and the things we dedicate our time to, do dictate to a certain extent how our end will be. This is not even science, it is logic. Have you ever seen how when someone dies we almost never miss to check their social media accounts and exclaim at their last posts? Sometimes we talk of how it is a strange coincidence that the last thing they posted was about death or pain or doing good deeds. But these things are never coincidences. Most of the times, if you check even the past posts of the same person you’d see similar posts. It is only that we mostly take notice of what someone said after they are gone for good (sadly).

So here comes the logic: If you love posting about food or fashion or even Islamic reminders there’s a high probability the last post before your death will be the same. If you spend 80% of your time reciting qur’an, then there’s quite a high probability that you will die reading the book of Allah and if you spend most of your time with earphones on and loud music popping, there’s also that probability you’d die in that same way. It is never a guarantee but we also can’t entirely dismiss this. One would think, what’s the big deal if I died with my earphones on? The big deal is that you’ll be resurrected in front of your Lord, not in sujood, or on a trip to do charity but in the sinning process. With what face do you stand before your God?Of course our Lord is the most Merciful and despite all our frequent sins, He is always ready to forgive us. But are we ready to accept our mistakes and repent sincerely? For how long will we be in denial?

We are living in this ridiculous century whereby everyone is ‘holier than thou’ or otherwise in the ‘don’t judge me’ phase. We always tend to forget that we are human beings and it is natural for us to sin and make mistakes but what then do we do? We deny. We deny that our lifestyles are filthy and our eyes are blinded by the materialistic world. We deny that we need to take a step back and think hard about our words and actions. We deny that we are being irresponsible and immature to think that God will JUST somehow forgive us even when we don’t try to change and sincerely repent.

I’ve seen several videos that show sudden deaths; someone died in sujood, another died in Makkah while doing hajj, another died while reciting qur’an in front of a large crowd…and yet still I’ve seen clips of people who’ve died while dancing, others who died on stage while singing and even while stealing. Yes, you read it right. A thief who died in the process of stealing. How scary is that? These people probably thought they’ll have an entire lifetime ahead of them; to enjoy life, to be happy and probably get close to God at some point? Well, tomorrow is not promised to anyone. How do we know that this bad habit we are so attached to will actually be the end of us?!

One of the scary true stories I heard is of a young lady who loved listening to music and dancing a lot. She was so passionate about it that she would indulge in the dancing whether it was Ramadhan or Jumuah or any other day, it never really mattered to her. So one day, this young lady was invited to a wedding and she was happily dancing around when someone suggested to her, ‘Why don’t you go dance at the stage?’ The young lady agreed and she went on to the stage. She folded one arm and kept her hand on the waist. She raised her other hand over her head and stood on her toes on one foot, ready to take a swirl. Just as she was taking the turn, she collapsed. Her family rushed her into the next room, splashed some water on her face but in vain. The girl was gone. Now during the ghusl time, her body remained fixated in that same last posture she was in just before her death; hand akimbo, another hand above her head and with one foot as if she were standing on her toes. The lady who was doing ghusl tried everything to force her body straight but she didn’t succeed. She then decided to call a sheikh to ask for help. The sheikh suggested that she washes her with warm water over her muscles maybe then her body would relax and straighten up. The lady said that she had even tried immersing the entire body in warm water but still, it wouldn’t budge. With nothing else possible, the young lady was buried in that same posture.

The lady who did the ghusl asked the mother about her daughter and she said of how obsessed she was with music and dancing. She would always send her younger brother to go buy her the latest releases of music. The strange thing was that after she had collapsed, her body was straight. It was only when she was taken for ghusl that her body posture turned like that during the dance. Subhanallah. And that was her end…and unfortunately, this is how she will be resurrected.

The truth is, we are not dumb or stupid. Not at all. We know of our sins and we know what habits we need to discard. But do we really even try to take a step and think of our sins or do we attack those who try to correct us? When people tell us about Miraa or smoking or hijab or anything else, do we stop for a moment and think, ‘What if they are right? What if my choices will really lead to my horrible end?!

The good news is that our Lord is indeed the Most Forgiving Most Merciful. Each one of us is struggling with some bad habits or sins that we frequently commit. What we do about them is what matters. If we sincerely put the intention to change and actually TRY to become better Muslims, then Allah will definitely help us and easen for us the path and judge us according to how we strive to get closer to Him.

Indeed life is short and we can never know in which way we will die. Best thing is to pray for a beautiful ending and a beautiful meeting with our Lord when the time comes. Let us keep praying for ourselves and even for our fellow Muslims that we may follow the right path. May Allah guide us and grant us husnul khatima. Ameen.

This article initially appeared in the JKUMSA magazine of 2019 that was released recently. To read/download the issue click on this link: http://magazine.jkumsa.or.ke/magazine/the-light-april-2018-issue/2019/


The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “(The performance of) ‘Umrah is an expiation for the sins committed between it and the previous ‘Umrah; and the reward of Hajj Mabrur (i.e., one accepted) is nothing but Jannah.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

You can now join the Muzney Hajj Group for this important spiritual journey. Check out the details in the poster below.

Back in university one of the ladies in our lot got pregnant in the middle of the semester. Or at least that’s when her belly started revealing. The lady was very quiet and reserved. She wasn’t a Muslim but she always seemed decent. Soon as her pregnancy became vivid, some of my mates started saying, ‘See she was acting all innocent but now she’s been exposed.’ I thought about it to myself for a moment and I said, ‘But that’s not fair.’ I mean, for the years that I knew the lady there was no single day she declared herself ‘innocent’ nor was there any day that I saw her pointing fingers and slandering others for their wrongdoings. There was no day that she acted or even spoke like she was ‘holier than thou’. How was it really fair to slander someone when they slip just because they weren’t openly showing their horns or posting it up on social media for the whole world to see?

See, wrong is wrong however we try to sugarcoat it. But there’s always more to the story. The world we live in at the moment is the kind that expects you to put up your dirty laundry outside on broad daylight in the name of ‘I am being myself. At least I don’t pretend.’

I once had a conversation with a lady who was talking about her personal situation and some sort of scheme she was plotting. Okay, no judgement whatsoever. But then the conversation rolled on to a point where she said, ‘Hawa wakimya ndio nawaheshimu. Utaona hakuna innocent kama wao then just one day they shock you to the peak with their actions.’

I mean, where did this mentality come from? That one should either be openly sinning and making mistakes or be the perfect angel as we see you. Where was it written that exposing your mistakes makes you any better than the one who doesn’t? Or that the one who doesn’t is a hypocrite? Isn’t it silly that we consider the reserved, seemingly pious people to be 120% right, 360 degrees all round perfect?! Like ‘Oh my God, he is PERRR-VECT, nur ala nur 😀

Really bro?!

We see it all the time. With sheikhs, famous people and colleagues. Someone does a mistake that is exposed and poof! Everyone has a reaction and an opinion and we just blow it completely out of proportion because ‘they were hypocrites all along’. That same thing, if it were to be done by anyone else we would go on with our lives like nothing happened. But hey! this is so and so…we have to break the internet about it.

We come out each day showing people our displeasing actions because we want people to see us for who we are and accept us as is. But in the process of doing that, we unveil any sense of shame left within us because the moment someone approaches us to humbly correct us we are so quick to say, ‘Don’t judge me’ or ‘You shouldn’t judge me.’ The same goes to those who openly reveal the good that they do and slander everyone else who isn’t like what they perceive themselves.

Truth is that there is no angel. There is no one who can look back and confidently say, ‘I am perfect or sinless’. We are all struggling with something, whether it is visible or not, we are. Even the best of sheikhs and the people we consider our role models. We all have skeletons hidden in our wardrobe and chapters of our lives we don’t read out loud. There are people we have harmed or caused pain, whether intentionally or not, we have. So the next time a certain sheikh or role model does a mistake and the internet family actively discuss about him/her, remember that they too are human beings. They wrong just as you do. The mistakes or sins may be different but they are still there. And just because you can’t see them, doesn’t mean you should forget that they too have flaws and weaknesses and things they are not proud of.

Fair enough, you’d probably be disappointed because you looked up to them but never allow that to overshadow your judgment on who can or can’t sin and who should/shouldn’t be forgiven.

Most importantly, don’t let the current world push you to exposing your sins in the fear of people having overly high expectations on you. You being ashamed about your mistakes and sins is the first step to repentance. Or how else do you expect to sincerely repent after posting it on your social media page with your sparkling smile as you sin?!

Abu Hurayrah (radi Allahu anhu) reported that the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said, “Every one of my followers will be forgiven except those who expose (openly) their wrongdoings. An example of this is that of a man who commits a sin at night which Allah has covered for him, and in the morning, he would say (to people): ‘I committed such and such sin last night’ while Allah had kept it a secret. During the night Allah has covered it up but in the morning he tears up the cover provided by Allah Himself.” [Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim]

There is a famous story of the sahabi Nuayman ‘ibn Amr Al-Ansari RA who was known to have issues with alcohol. Despite knowing the ruling of Islam towards the intoxicating drink, Nuayman RA struggled with breaking his addiction, and was flogged twice for drinking. Upon the second flogging, ‘Umar RA who was angered by Nuayman’s RA behaviour quipped, “La ‘nat Allah alayhi – may God’s curse be on him”. The Prophet Muhammad (S), upon hearing this, was quick to intervene, “No, no, don’t do (such a thing). Indeed he loves God and His Apostle. The major sin (as this) does not put one outside the community and the mercy of God is close to the believers.” Watch the full story on Nuayman here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TCCzKs3-bo

The reason I shared his story is because it should be a reminder that even the sahabis did sin and mistakes too yet that didn’t make them to be regarded any less than the believers they were. The difference with us is how much they really regretted their acts and most importantly, how the prophet treated the believers who sinned; without despising them or shunning them off.

Once a young man came to the Prophet ﷺ requesting from the Prophet to grant this man permission to have sex outside of marriage. The people were shocked and were trying to silence his question. The Prophet ﷺ asked him a series of questions. “Would you like it for your mom?” He ﷺ continued to ask if this man would like it for his daughter, sister or other female relatives. The man continually responded in the negative, intellectually convinced by the logical argument of the Prophet ﷺ. Finally, the Prophet placed his blessed hand on the man and prayed to God, “Dear God! May you forgive his sins, purify his heart and make him chaste.” And it is narrated that this man never got involved in what he was requesting after this experience with the Prophet.

Ibn Mas`ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man kissed a woman. So he came to the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and informed him about it. Then Allah revealed this Ayah: “And perform the Salat, between the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night. Verily, the good deeds efface the evil deeds (i.e., minor sins).” (11:114) The man asked the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) whether this applies to him only. The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “It applies to all of my Ummah.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Now imagine if these situations happened today and the people involved were maybe known to be pious or God-fearing; how would we react then?! How would we respond to them? Wouldn’t we be the first ones to label them as hypocrites and a disgrace to the Muslim community? Wouldn’t it be a big scandal that we’d talk about for days on?! The prophet p.b.u.h corrected them and prayed for them instead. We should also keep in mind that we’d never know how much a person regrets their actions, feels extremely guilty and cries for repentance every night. Be merciful upon others just like you’d want others to be with you if you were in the same position. Never say ‘I’d never do that or say that’ because honestly, life is the scariest thing to be too sure about. Tables turn every.single.day.

This of course isn’t a justification for anyone’s wrongdoings. Nor should it be an excuse and an easy gateway for people to sin secretly in the hope that Allah (S.W) will cover our tracks. Also, this differs according to the sin/mistake in hand. Cases like rape, sodomy, molestation, harassment, murder or any other grave sin may need a call for justice upon the doer so as to protect others from him/her or to remove them from a certain position.

Allah (S.W) surely knows what is in our hearts and what we struggle with to change and our intentions behind all our actions. Don’t expose your sins but also try with all your being to keep away from them.

Ibn al-Qayyim Rahimahu Llah said : ‘Know that if people are impressed with you, they are impressed with the beauty of Allah’s covering of your sins.’

Thank Allah (S.W) when He protects the world from seeing the darkness within you. Thank Allah when He guides you. Thank Allah when He grants you a chance to sincerely repent.

May Allah (S.W) protect us from the whispering of shaitan and from our own nafs and guide us together with all our loved ones. Ameen.

P.S Leave the skeletons where they belong; in the wardrobe (not literally, but you get me right? )

Sometimes we look at our heap of sins, at our bad habits, at our personality flaws and think to ourselves, ‘At this age and time how will I ever change?’ We feel like there is no hope for us especially after we tried to change but we kept sliding back to our same old destructive habits. Yet there is always hope. Always. Allah S.W says ‘Do not despair from the mercy of Allah’. All we have to do is keep striving to be better individuals, keep praying for ourselves and others and watch Allah take us out of the trash pit.

A beautiful story of sheikh Malik ibn Dinar is just one of the proofs that Allah’s mercy is endless.

Malik ibn Dinar used to be an alcoholic and a highway robber. Everyone knew him for those traits until it became his identity. One day he comes across a poor man and a rich man trying to buy bread from another man. The man only had one bread remaining and just as the poor man paid for it, the rich man offered to pay quadriple the price for the same bread. The poor man said to the seller, “Please I really need the bread. My daughters will starve to death if they don’t get something to eat.” But the rich was still ready to pay more for the bread. Malik ibn Dinar was triggered by this and went to them whilst very angry. He paid the seller more than what the rich man had paid so that the poor man can get the bread. But the rich man still added more money. Malik added some more money again. It went on like that until the poor man got the bread. He then said to the poor man, “When your daughters eat tonight, tell them to pray for Malik ibn Dinar” and he went away.

Years went by and Malik was still an alcoholic and a robber. When he wanted to marry he couldnt get a wife because of his reputation. So he bought a slave, freed her then married her. He really loved his wife and God blessed them with a daughter called Fathima.

Malik was very attached to his daughter and vice versa. They had a very close bond. And sometimes when Malik was seated with Fathima on his lap while he drinks wine his daughter told him, “Father I dont like this. I hate this” referring to the alcohol. Malik knew that his daughter hated the wines and alcohol but he still couldn’t stop his bad habits.

A time came when Fathima became very ill and passed away at a very tender age. Malik was so shattered and was drinking even more now to forget his pain. He hadn’t slept for days and one time, he fell into deep sleep due to the excess fatigue.

In his sleep, he dreamt that it was the day of judgement and the world looked chaotic. A monster (in some narrations they say it was a huge snake) emerged and started running after him. Malik ran away but the monster was still running behind him. He reached a cliff and below him was jahannam and behind was the monster. He decided to go to another direction, still running. He arrived at the coast of an ocean and a very old man in a white robe was seated at the coast. He went towards him to ask for help but the old man was very frail and weak. He just pointed to Malik to a direction and Malik followed the way. He kept running, the monster still behind him until he reached to a hill with small beautiful cave openings. He saw children, girls at the entrance of the caves and he immediately knew these were the daughters of the poor man he bought the bread for. The girls started calling out “Fathima come save your father! Fathima come save your father!”

Fathima appeared and motioned to the monster and it faded away.
Then she said to him:
“My dear father, ‘Has not the time come for the believers (who indulge in sins) that their hearts should submit in all humility to the remembrance of Allah and to the truth which is revealed’ (Al-Hadeed:16)”. He was moved to tears and asked her “My dear child, what was this monster?” She said “It was your own evil deeds which had made it so strong that it was about to push you into Jahannam”. Heasked “And who was that white-robed old man?” She replied “That were your good deeds and you had made them so weak with your scanty good deeds that he could not help you against the monster(though he suggested to you a means of escape.)” One of the few good deeds was the one he helped the poor man get bread for his daughters.
His daughter then asked him, “Father isn’t it time yet to repent?” Then he woke up from his sleep saying, “Yes it is time. Yes it is time.”

He stood up and went to the masjid. The imam (it is said that it was Imam Shafii, Allahu a3lam) led the prayer and recited the same verse that his daughter had recited to him.
‘Has not the time come for the believers (who indulge in sins) that their hearts should submit in all humility to the remembrance of Allah and to the truth which is revealed’ Malik was weeping uncontrollably. After the prayers he went home, packed his clothes and went off to Madina to acquire deen knowledge. He thereafter became a very famous, pious and knowlegable sheikh who propagated Islam.

It is through his pain for losing his child that Malik ibn Dinar repented. Many times Allah puts us in a difficult situation or takes something beloved from us just to make us realize how much we need Him. So do not ever give up on yourself or even on someone else. This story of repentance is a reminder for us that the door of repentance is open to even the most devilish sinner.  Allah’s mercy remains endless and He guides whomsoever He wills. Keep working on yourself. Don’t be discouraged by your sins or by irrational thoughts that Allah will never help you or accept your repentance. Another lesson we get from Malik’s story is the importance of sadaqa and dua in a person’s life. You just never know when or how or what will lead to your/someone else’s guidance. May Allah guide us all. Ameen.

Photo Courtesy: https://img03.rl0.ru

How many times have you looked into the mirror and hated what you saw? Hated what is inside you and not necessarily what is outside you? How many times has the past haunted you? Regrets? Wrong choice of words? Recklessness? Sin? Arrogance? Wrong decisions? Hurt the people who loved you the most?

Here’s the bad news; what is gone can never be recovered, but the good news is, if you are feeling that pinch, that pain struggling out of the shadows of the past, it means you have a healthy conscious. It means your heart is not completely dead yet. It means you haven’t turned ice cold yet. It means you still have a chance to make up for the past; to move on and to start over once again.

Nonetheless, Allah mercy has never known limits. Anyone seeking His forgiveness, His Mercy was going to get it however bad and cold you think you are.


The past is full of secrets, regrets, abuse, conflict and tag of wars. We all have chapters we don’t read loud. We all have mistakes we are not proud of. If this will make you feel any better, remember that the prophets too did mistakes (not major sinning, just humanly mistakes).

One of the pious predecessors observed: “Had repentance not been the most beloved of acts to Allah, He would not have tested with sin the most beloved creatures to Him.”

Here are some examples of these mistakes:

Allah says: “Thus did Adam disobey His Lord, and fell into error, but his Lord chose him (for His grace): He turned to him, and gave him guidance.” [Sûrah TâHâ: 122]

The mistake of Adam (peace be upon him) was his partaking of the forbidden tree.

Allah says, relating the words of Noah (peace be upon him): “O my Lord, I do seek refuge with You from asking ask You for that of which I have no knowledge, and unless You forgive me and have mercy upon me, I should indeed be among the losers.” [Sûrah Hûd: 47]

The mistake of Noah (peace be upon him) was his seeking to intercede on behalf of his unbelieving son.

The Qur’ân relates to us mistakes of a similar, minor nature for David and Solomon (peace be upon them both).

About Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him), Allah says: “That Allah may forgive you your faults of the past and those to follow.” [Sûrah al-Fath: 2]

We should also be aware of the fact that the Qur’ân never mentions a wrongdoing being committed by any Prophet without mentioning his repentance thereof. The Prophets were divinely protected from ever insisting upon their mistakes or persisting in them. They would immediately repent to Allah for any mistake, act of forgetfulness, or any other shortcoming. Then Allah accepted their repentance.

So if the prophets fell into minor sinning, what about us? What about the weak creatures we are before Allah? We are not infallible. Hence the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “By the One in Whose hand is my soul, if you did not commit sin Allaah would do away with you and bring people who would commit sin then pray for forgiveness.” Narrated by Muslim, 2749.

Above all that, Allah has showed us in several ayahs how He is ready to receive our repentance:

Say: “My servants, you who have transgressed against yourselves, do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Truly Allah forgives all wrong actions. He is the Ever-Forgiving, the Most Merciful.”
The Holy Quran 39:53

Verily, God’s acceptance of repentance relates only to those who do evil out of ignorance and then repent before their time runs out and it is they unto whom God will turn again in His mercy – for God is all-knowing, wise; – 4:17 (Asad)

“And verily, I am indeed forgiving to him who repents, believes (in My Oneness, and associates none in worship with Me) and does righteous good deeds, and then remains constant in doing them (till his death)”

[Ta-Ha 20:82] 

“And those who, when they have committed Faahishah (illegal sexual intercourse) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allaah and ask forgiveness for their sins; — and none can forgive sins but Allaah — and do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know”

[Aal ‘Imraan 3:135] 

“And whoever does evil or wrongs himself but afterwards seeks Allaah’s forgiveness, he will find Allaah Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Nisa’ 4:110] 

If Allah has opened the doors of forgiveness to us, then why not use them? Now close your eyes, take a deep breath and let it out. It is not easy to forget the past, it in fact takes a little piece of us each time with it but don’t just allow it to consume you wholly. No human being was going to live in this world for 40, 50, 70 years or even just 20 without making some mistakes and sins along the way. Learn from the past mistakes, live in the present, remain positive, ask for forgiveness to those you hurt, pray to Allah for guidance and keep hoping. Let bygones be bygones!

I will end this by a hadith by the prophet peace be upon him: “Every son of Adam sins, and the best of those who sin are those who repent.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi.



References: http://en.islamtoday.net/artshow


How many times have you said to someone else, ‘don’t judge me’ or heard it from someone else perhaps? With no doubt this statement is increasingly becoming our biggest yet most lame excuse for everything. Are you being judged too much? Naah. Are you over justifying yourself? YES!

With the coming of technology and the evolution of the world, people have somehow become sensitive over what they say about or comment to someone about their behaviour or actions, which to some extent is not bad. As the common saying goes, ‘don’t judge others when you don’t know their journey,’ or that everyone should mind their own business. We are actually advised to give people the benefit of doubt as many times as possible and try to understand their journey rather than automatically criticize what they do or say.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a big supporter of giving benefit of doubts, giving people a million other chances and trying to give them space they need but have you noticed how we are increasingly letting ourselves drown in this lame excuse of ‘don’t judge me?’

It’s very important that first people realize that there is a difference between judging someone and correcting them. When I tell you you should reduce on swearing it just means you should reduce on the swearing. Period. There is NO judgement in any way in that statement. But when I start saying that you are good at nothing other than swearing and you are just an evil person who should go straight to hell then yes, I am judging you. Maybe we should learn to differentiate the good intentioned correction from the ill judgement so that we don’t unnecessarily over-use the ‘don’t judge me’ statement. But now everyone is obsessed with this statement which actually in other words means, ‘I very well know that I am doing wrong but just shut up because this is my life.’

People usually correct others only for either of these three reasons. One is that they really care about you and want the best for you. Second is that your actions or words either irritate, bother or annoy them and lastly, they correct you to criticize you which may end up being counted as a judgement. I’ll give this simple example: You have always been a good person but just this one day you are caught stealing; something that you don’t usually do..

Person number one: I really know you had a crucial matter that needed urgent attention and that’s why you stole…but nonetheless, stealing is still wrong, whatever the reason. Please next time when you need any assistance do come to me or so and so and we will help you …just don’t do it again please because we all know you are not a thief.

Person number two: Listen here bro, I know you are my friend but I was really pissed when I knew that you stole from me. Don’t expect me to forgive you any time soon not unless you prove to me that this will never happen again.

Person number three: Hey thief, so what are you planning to steal this time? I always knew you looked like one and now you just proved me right.

In such a scenario, you have no right to say to person number one and two that they are judging you except for the third individual. However, many would still say ‘mind your own business.’ ‘don’t interfere with what doesn’t concern you’ etcetera etcetera etcetera but maybe you should know that whatever you do actually does affect the people around you even if it is indirectly. So please drop the ‘don’t judge me because only God is supposed to judge me,’ and instead accept the truth as it is. Accept positive criticism and most importantly accept that you NEED to be corrected. And not just you, everyone needs to be corrected, guided and shown the way when we are lost.

Maybe you should also realize that someone else in this world is probably facing a much greater problem than yours yet they still don’t go for evil ways to cope up with life. So this kind of justification is most of the times inappropriate. We all do mistakes and most of the times none of us wants to be seen in the wrong but it’s just human so please accept your own baggage of mistakes and instead of justifying yourself too much try and swallow your pride and change your ways. And when you feel no one has the right to correct you then please use the right words like, ‘don’t correct me’ instead of ‘don’t judge me.’ Because you are not being judged, you are just over justifying your own mistakes.

Photo Courtesy: Unknown

The best thing about imperfections is that they make us who we are and they always make us stronger and braver than before. The silly mistakes we make at work, at school, at home or with our friends don’t mean we are stupid or useless as some of us may think. Man is to error and no one is perfect however successful or perfect they may look in your eyes.
Even the most successful and popular personalities, failed or had low points at some period. But what made them what they are today is their hard work and passion to go beyond those failures and imperfections. It is that effort they made to be better people that got them recognized as achievers.
Losing hope and giving up at the first sign of failure just shows how weak a person is. If everyone gave up at the first sign of hardship, then we definitely wouldn’t have achievers. Sometimes, failure tests our faith and amount of trust we have in ourselves. We have to be the kind of people who don’t have to regret later on that we didn’t work hard enough to get to our goals. We have to keep on trying again and again until we finally get to the peak of the mountain and we can finally shout “Yes! I am finally here.”
One may say to themselves “I tried and tried and tried, again and again, but I didn’t succeed, so what is the point?” The thing is, maybe you didn’t really try in the best way possible or maybe you gave up too early or maybe you were simply pursuing the wrong goal. Wanting to be a doctor while you are very poor in sciences, or going for an accountancy course while mathematics twists you upside down, or opening a new restaurant in an area where all hotels are closing, may be the reason why you failed.

Instead of giving up hope, sometimes you just need to refocus. After you’ve tried your level best and still haven’t succeeded, why not focus on your strengths or review your game-plan? Everyone is good at something and even if you haven’t realized then do know you have a gift. You just have to discover it.

To minimize the risk of failure it is important to carefully consider your goals and plans. Think long and hard before undertaking any major project. Consider the following questions: ‘do I have what I need to make it?’, ‘Is this what I really want?’, and ‘Is this the best use of my skills and resources?’ but most importantly, ‘am I being realistic?’ after you’ve sat down and asked yourself such questions, then this is where you bring in all your effort, passion, hard work, zeal and focus to make your dreams and goals come true.

But remember; don’t mind the mistakes or failures. Learn from them and make yourself a better person from your imperfections. As the famous American author, Zig Ziglar once said, if you learn from defeat, you haven’t really lost.

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The human being was created in such a way that he is not perfect and continuously commits mistakes. Even the prophets brought to us did some mistakes in their spiritual mission. This just proves the real form in which we human beings were created. But the most significant thing before God is when a person continuously tries to become a better person. We sin, He forgives, we sin again, He forgives and we sin again and again but still He forgives us. So where is the problem? The problem is with us who don’t appreciate that God is being merciful and take the second chances with appreciation. For change to take place you must go through a process, it can’t be in one or two days. It may be in months or even years for one to achieve one’s own ideal self. The following is one of the processes to achieve good change in one self.

  1. Accept your mistakes

The human being is in most occasions stubborn when it comes to accepting their mistakes. You try to justify your actions again and again with lame reasoning while you know very well you are the one in the wrong. A small example is how a teenage will be scolded for watching Television when they had been asked to go study for an exam. Then the young boy or girl keeps justifying themselves by saying ‘I wanted to watch news, it’s also important knowledge’ or such excuses. The examples may go on and on how people would argue just so that they may not be the ones in the wrong. It’s high time we abandoned our pride and take responsibility of our mistakes.

  1. Taking responsibility of mistakes done

After you have accepted your mistake, don’t just sit and wail over it. Don’t cry over spilt milk and as the Swahili saying goes, ‘yaliyopita si ndwele tugange yajayo.’ That’s the spirit. If you tripped and made a woman pregnant, don’t ask her for abortion. Take responsibility of your actions with happiness just as you did the actions with happiness. That is just being humane with yourself and the people involved.

  1. Change the environment if necessary

Sometimes, the environment we live in is what affects our attitude and behaviour. If the place you are living is what influences you to keep over drinking, robbing people or any other evil acts then MOVE! For you to change then you must sacrifice and even though it may be tough, you have to close your eyes tightly and pretend not to see all the difficulty ahead. It’s all about being strong to overcome your weaknesses.

  1. Sieve out your friends

Friends make up an important part in our lives. They are the ones who make us who we are at most times. Friends may be good for our well being but they may also be the reason of our downfall, evilness, pain and so much more.

As a quote by Buddha says, “an insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.”

Once you have decided to change, then do know whom to keep as a friend. You must reconsider each one of them one by one; who has always lead you to be a better you and who was the one who kept pushing you into doing evil. It is important you know who really makes a difference in your life. And by this, we don’t only mean friends as such; it may include relatives, colleagues or even parents.

  1. Follow up your change process

Once you have done all the above then make sure you follow up the process. Don’t get tired too early. Get near your God and have faith in Him. It is obviously going to be hectic for you but don’t you yearn for the peace ahead? It is going to be awesome. Just keep going and you will finally be able to kill the wicked you.