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Creative Non-Fiction

DEAR WIFE

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Photo Courtesy: http://feelgrafix.com/

By: Ahmed Shayo

Dear wife,,

How are u doing? It has been quite a while since i felt the familiar pleasure of watching the sun dance in the brown of your eyes. As you can tell, I miss u dearly, so much that I spend my days hear at work loosing myself in the gravity of thoughts that always lead me to you. I pray you are doing fine & well.

I must confess, it is rather unorthodox for me to write a letter, not because there exists a new technology that’s easier & simpler & faster to use than the internet, but because the last time i did this in primary school it turned out to be quite an embarrassing experience for me ?. Then again, since u got out of your way to write down one for me, i’d say I’m obligated return the favor, tat for the tit right? *wink* [no pun intended] ?

So where do I begin? Ironical how you think about someone for so long but when it comes down to putting words to the thought it all goes away. Then again, its always been the effect that you had on me. It should come as no surprise that my love for you seems to supercede the extent of what I can comprehend. Like color, its indescribable how a simple pigment pulls the attention of the eye to the detail it describes,, like the pink on your lips… Or the brown on your skin.. Or the light in your smile. It just is. And i cherish that, not coz i wanna sound like a love lorn Romeo in this letter,, but because they are the 1st things that made me attracted to you. [ps: i still do] ?

As a husband, i find it difficult to adjust to this life of commitment & mutual understanding. Before you came into my life, I ate irregularly, slept in a 1 bed-roomed apartment & rarely stayed home. Being a bachelor back then [a very eligible one i might add] has been a lifestyle i easily & naturally adopted to. Now I’m married with kids & am thinking, damn! I grew up too fast. But I have different priorities now. I have someone I can sacrifice my pleasures for. I have someone that waits for me to get home & when I do, she’s always complaining that i should avoid getting in the house past 10 pm. But hey, a man’s gotta do what he must, and since u decided to steal my heart I gotta work out how am gonna take care of u [i am not complaining by the way so you can relax]. So i’ll do what I can, keep u warm.. Satisfy u to the limits of my abilities [except during soccer matches, hapo itabidi umezee roho safi hadi game iishe ?]

You know, now that I think about it, I am actually proud that I got quite the exquisite taste in choosing a wife. Then again, my dad did have the same taste too so i figure it runs in the family. You are beautiful, so much that I wanna show u out to the world for a brief moment then hide u kabla mafisi wachangamke. That said, I expect u to maintain your dignity, not as a wife.. but as my wife. Ur the epitome of my pride, and if I loose that then I loose my worth. So take care of yourself in as much the same way that u’d take care of me. And i don’t need another wife and have to juggle in between sleeping in separate houses and satisfying both of y’all at the same time. Juzi tayari u almost bit my head off coz nilisahau kukuchukulia slippers kwa fundi ???

So anyway, I don’t really have a lot of standards. & thus letter wasn’t written just so I tell you how to be a wife and behave like one. You are matured. Am sure you have it all under control. This letter was simply to send out a declaration – everything i do, will do, and will never get tired of is keeping u happy. That’s all that matters to me, because as a husband, i believe that should be my top priority. The things we do for love right? You are lucky you married a luhya, cheki vili unatunzwa hapa ?

Am signing out now. These bills won’t go away even if I kiss them like I kiss you *wink*. I love you gorgeous. Take care.

Yours eternally,
Ahmed

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Creative Non-Fiction

DEAR FUTURE WIFE 2

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By: Swaleh Arif Sayyid Ali

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful.
Praise and blessings be upon His Beloved messenger, Muhammad (pbuh).

Recently an article was posted, entitled ‘Dear Future Wife’. It tried to describe what men want from women during marriage. Consequently, the article received some backlash, understandably so. However, the criticism, to me, was too scathing and the approach made was not the best one. Admittedly, I did place myself in the position of current and future wives, thereby understanding their anger towards the aforementioned article. As a result, I have decided to write my own version of ‘Dear Future Wife’. Feedback is welcome, positive or otherwise. Bear in mind though, ninety per cent of what you’ll read didn’t come from me, I’m simply re-telling what’s been forgotten…

Dear future wife,

Before I begin, I’d like to give you salaam and may Allah’s Grace and Mercy be upon you always and forever.
As a man living in the 21st century, I have seen how marriage has been degraded to something that is almost worthless (thanks to our own forgetfulness and the emergence of western idealism). However, I’m not writing to you about the failings of society, I’m writing to you about what to expect from me as your future husband.
Marriage is holy and sacred. To seek guidance on something of this nature, one needs to look no further than the Holy Qur’an and the Sunnah of the prophet Muhammad (pbuh). One of my greatest wishes is to be the best husband a wife could ever ask for. The only way I can be that person, my beloved, is by treating you the same way the prophet (pbuh) treated his wives. I know I’ll never reach his level, but rest assured that I’ll do everything within my power to be the kind of husband that Allah and His Messenger (pbuh) will approve of.

I don’t expect you to cook for me. That’s my privilege and not your responsibility. Cook because you want to, not because you have to. I want to know that my dish was prepared with love and your only aim is to please The Almighty (by pleasing me). No matter how bad your food will be, I won’t frown, or abuse you, or even beat you (Allah protect me from such). Rather, expect me to smile and say it was the best dish I’d ever tasted. I’ll eat from the same plate as you, drink from the same cup as you and feed you from my hand. That is an act of charity before the eyes of our Creator.

You’re my other half. I won’t shut you out from my daily affairs, because I will want to seek advice and guidance from you about important issues. You may know something I don’t, there’s no shame in that. I’m willing to quit watching football just so I can spend more time with you. It sounds far-fetched, I know. But you’re my wife and you’ll always come first.

When you’re sad, I’ll be the first person to rush towards you and hug you. I’ll wipe the tears from your face and call you by all those sweet names that you’ll adore so much. I’ll exercise tolerance with love and patience,observe silence when you snap at me during your mood swings, and overlook your flaws while focusing on your desireable traits.

My beloved, there’s so much I want to say, but I’ll stop here. What I have left out, I’ll make sure to add on it through actions once we’re married inshaAllah. Words are worthless if they’re not backed by actions. I know what I’ve promised sounds unfeasible, but if Muhammad (pbuh) could do it, then there’s no reason why I can’t as well bi idhinillah. All I ask, is for you to do good and abstain from evil, in order for our marriage to prosper. For now, know that I have carved out a niche in my heart, waiting for you to fill it.

And Allah knows best.

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DEAR PAIN

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Photo Courtesy: www.ayeina.com

Dear Pain,

From the moment I was born and as I grew up, I found myself already betrothed to you. It’s strange isn’t it? How does someone get betrothed at such an age? I mean, what if I turned out to be a vampire just when I turned thirteen? Weird. But it’s more of the culture issue I guess. As far as my memories go by into the past, I remember how you were so obsessed with me. You always fancied that both our names start with ‘P’ and you would always chorus it lovingly ‘Pain and Paranoia’. You were so loving yet so bitter. You were carrying all the world’s misery on your shoulders yet you still afforded to spend time with me. You would walk hand in hand with me and you would introduce me to all your friends. I still remember your best friends; Ego, Selfish and Evil. I remember how you would praise me in front of them as if I were the only girl in this world. You wanted the whole world to know how much you loved me and that you would never depart me. I remember all those days you would take me out with your so called best friends and we would have ‘fun’. That’s what you used to tell me; ‘let’s go have fun’ yet all I remember was hearing the four of you mock people and laugh so loudly. It used to puzzle me a lot. Well, you were quite older than me so I thought maybe I didn’t really understand what this ‘fun’ really meant. For the foolish girl I was, I’d stand next to you; your hand still firmly holding mine, just staring at you and your friends.

I still remember Ego; he was TALL. Really tall that I really had to strain my neck to see his face. But he was still elegant. He was quite handsome and I used to wonder why I wasn’t betrothed to him instead. He always had his hands in his pockets and talk with a firm voice. He walked with a bounce and his head was always held high. Is that what they call confidence? I used to admire him but that was then, I was barely fifteen. At that age you barely know how to differentiate between a cheetah and a tiger. I was so naive…but now…now I know everything in this life.

Selfish was hilariously short and it really used to make me laugh at how the four of you could be best friends. I mean, your physiques were so opposite. It is the first thing anyone would notice upon seeing you together. Anyway back to selfish. Selfish was so over confident. I have never seen anyone think so high of themselves. He always wanted to get the biggest share of everything for he thought he deserves it.To me, he looked a bully. I used to see him snatch food from the beggar’s mouth. Have you ever seen anyone so cruel like that? But selfish thought he deserves it. Sometimes I used to see him look at me maliciously and it used to freak me out. He probably also thought that he should have me instead of you. Well, you never noticed all that because you were always busy praising to the world about me without looking at their reactions. Maybe you trusted them so much??

Evil…evil was ugly. Damn ugly and ironically, he used to boast about himself like there is no one on this earth like him. Everything about him was ugly; his croaky laughter and even his dark enigmatic smile. He was rough and tough. He was all the three of you combined; he was torment, torture, unpleasant and wicked all together. He always considered himself the ring leader of your group.

I still remember the night your friends raped me. Oh…how can I forget the misery that came after. How can I forget the sadness and despair? You know what pain, you always used to make me wonder which side are you really? When your best friends raped me, you were mad. So mad that it worried me you would explode. Yet you decided to cover it up for them by marrying me. You thought that would make me forget. You thought you could make me happy once again.

Years went by and I gave birth to our first child; insomnia. Oh my son…he wouldn’t let me sleep. He made me turn and roll on the bed restlessly. I cried and cried until the wee hours of the night. I cried until I had no more tears. I cried until my pillow was too wet. I cried for you; because of you, for the past, present and future. I cried that you were the only person who loved me so dearly in this life. The only person who wouldn’t leave me alone. I treated myself with lots of chocolates and bowls of ice cream. As people say, treating oneself like that is good for the stressed soul…yet this technique didn’t work for me. My boy troubled me…but where were you Pain? You were just there with me; like a shadow. Always there yet never giving me the happiness I needed.

Insomnia grew and soon we had our second child. It was a girl this time. I was so happy. I wanted to make her my best friend, teach her how to cook and how to dress up. I had so many plans for her and for us. I called her ‘eating issues’. She was so fragile and weak. She had no appetite even to live. Her eyes looked tired and she was weightless like cotton. Eating issues worried me a lot. I worried that she was going to die soon yet she still lives; still as fragile. Still as weak.

Having too troublesome kids is not easy especially when you have an obsessive husband like you Pain. Anyway, God has now blessed me with another bump. A third one is coming. I think it’s a ‘she’. Don’t ask me how I know this. I am a mother, I can feel it. I have been thinking of aborting her for quite a while now but i’m a mother after all, I don’t think I can be that cruel. I think I will name her ‘pending issues’ for she will be born whilst her mother is still worrying about how much the past will affect her future. I hope ‘pending issues’ won’t trouble me. I hope she can be my hope.

Insomnia and Eating issues have grown to be teenagers now yet each one of them is still worrying their mother in a different way. Insomnia wouldn’t let me rest and stop crying. Eating issues wouldn’t let me have a peace of mind or a healthy life. ‘Pending issues’ is soon coming by…

My dear husband; Pain, I have never really enjoyed the idea of having a man so obsessed with me. I’ve had enough of you. I want to be free once again. I want to breath fresh air once again. I want to fly and be happy. I just don’t want to live with you anymore…

I am sorry Pain…I really need a divorce from you. Please grant me that as soon as possible. I already kept the divorce papers under my pillow. My very wet pillow. I hope the papers are still safe. Please do sign them soon. If you truly love me then do it for my sake. Please. Allow me to be the free woman I’ve always wanted to be. Don’t worry about our children. I promise to take good care of them. I was also planning to change their names soon. I was thinking of calling our son, Brave instead of Insomnia. As for our daughter Eating issue, let’s call her ‘Love’ and when our last baby finally comes by, I will call her ‘Hope’. I am sure you like the names right? I know you can trust me to take care of them and raise them with good manners and health. Please do take care of yourself as well and I hope we can meet years from now where your name would then be something like ‘Delight’ or probably ‘Euphoria?’. No, ‘Jubilant’ is even better! My name then would be ‘Joy’ and you will be able to chorus our new names once again, ‘Jubilant and Joy’. I promise we will be happy then.

Before I end this heart-breaking letter, I want to really thank you for being there with me throughout; for the lessons learnt and for the undying love.

Your so-long-loving wife,
Your soon-divorcee,

Paranoia.

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Creative Non-Fiction

DEAR FUTURE WIFE

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Dear Future Wife,

By: Anonymous.

Photo Courtesy: Salem_Beliegraphy

 

Assalam Aleykum.

Hey you, what are you up to?

Um…hmm, sorry am kinda nervous right now. The truth is, thinking about the future scares the heck out of me. I hate not knowing what will happen to me ten years from now or one year from now or even in the next five seconds. Yet for some reason, picturing you in it always brings a smile to my face. It brings calm to a stormy sea, and for good reason.

I may not know you yet, but I already think you’re just too pretty to be true. The world may be round, yet again it might be flat, but that you are the most beautiful girl I’ll ever meet is a fact beyond deliberation.

I have no expectations whatsoever to be honest about the kind of person you’ll turn out to be.  If anything, I’ll be willing to take the reminder of my life to understand you and if else all fails, then to simply accept you for who you are.

I don’t know what mistakes you have committed in the past or present but I can overlook your flaws. Because despite what people always say, I think everyone deserves a second chance. The more lost a soul is anyway, the more susceptible it is to guidance and rebirth. If I am to be the reason you end up turning a corner and being the most pious lady to ever walk on earth, then darling am all yours.

I am not the perfect human specimen either, I am guilty of being naïve where naivety is of considerable detriment. I have flaws in personality that need to be ironed out, but I believe I’ll be ready cometh the hour.

One thing you should know though, in all my twenty something years I’ve lived on earth, the ladies at home have simply spoiled me to a wreck with their delectable cooking. They can cook a rock and make it taste like chicken. I know, I know it’s unfair to put that much pressure on you, I understand but…*cough* culinary classes *cough*…am willing to pay… *cough*…whatever the fees…*cough*. In any case, I’ll definitely help around the kitchen if you need me, and I’ll do my best not to chop off my fingers instead of the onions while am at it.

Oh another thing, I love exercising. I wonder if you do too. It won’t matter of course, if you don’t. Personally, I believe fitness is a matter of choice really but be warned, we’ll hold occasional races between you and me. Whoever loses will do the dishes all by themselves that day (and there shall be no dish washing machine in the house!)

You’ll be more than welcome to milk my wallet dry. But my wallet only and no other man’s. It will be my privilege to make you feel as comfortable as possible, it is a mission I’ll see through to my death. But I know you, you’re not driven by material things. You’re not overwhelmingly concerned about worldly life. Your focus, like mine, is towards that everlasting place Allah has promised for every pious man and pious woman.

Kids? Of course, yes. I haven’t put my finger on a number yet, but obviously the more the merrier, right? Heck, let’s start our own village. We’ll teach them Quran and Sunnah and then scatter them all over God’s earth so they can spread the spirit and love of Islam. Together with them we’ll flush out all evil from the darkest corners of this world, or so I hope.

Speaking of corners of the world, do you like to travel? I most certainly do. I would love to travel all over the world if God blesses us with the means. I’ll take you to the weirdest of places, feed you the weirdest of native cuisines, meet people with names that mean something offensive back home. I feel the earth is calling for me to explore it every single day, but I can push my schedule back and prepare an itinerary for two instead. See, am making sacrifices for you already.

I can be awkward and feel misplaced in matters where love is concerned. Frankly, sometimes I feel my own family don’t understand just how much I love them, simply because I don’t know how to express it in words. But for some reason, I just know…I just simply know, you will make me sing, you will make me chant, you will make me shout at the top of my voice, to express the love I will feel for you.

I hope wherever you are now, that you are safe and happy. I want you to be all you can be and hope to be. I want you to more than just survive this time barrier separating us, but to thrive. I want you to worry less and live more. And when we finally meet inshaAllah, I want to make you feel like you’ve never lived before.

See you soon, Habibtyl Kheir.

You Know Who..

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