Author

Lubnah Abdulhalim


Browsing
Deen (Religion)

My U̶m̶r̶a̶h̶ Trip

By

Exactly 31 nights ago, on October 6th, I stood outside Terminal 2 at Moi International Airport, hugging my father goodbye as I waited to board my Jambojet flight. “Forgive me, Baba,” I murmured, feeling a lump in my throat. “Hmm, I have to think about it,” he laughed. “Listen, once you get there, make sure you find a way to fulfill what we asked you to do,” he reminded me of the important family mission I was tasked with once I arrived in Saudi Arabia. I nodded silently. “Let me check in.”

“It’s too early,” my brother said. 

“I know, but if I stay out here, I’ll start crying. I just want to go in.” My sister laughed as my patriarchs shook their heads. They nodded and each gave me one last hug.

As I walked inside, my brother followed, trying to help me load my luggage into the baskets. They stood there until I disappeared through the doors at the far end. Once I finally sat down, I called my mother to let her know I had checked in. She made dua for me and wished me a safe journey. That’s when the lump in my throat finally broke. I let the tears flow freely. My reality felt surreal. I was going for Umrah. Me? My good Lord. How incredible that this seemingly distant dream was finally coming true!

This very moment was a manifestation of a miracle, an answered dua, a subsequent heartbreak, and one of the most important lessons I had to learn in my life.

***

The first time I seriously began making dua for Umrah and Hajj was in 2023, after taking the ‘Raise Your Dua’ course with Shaykh Muhammad Al Shariff. Before that, I would merely daydream and make dua for a visit to the Holy Lands in passing. But after the course, this specific dua became one of my six dream duas, the ones I would repeat during sujood, when it rained, when the masjid was empty at my workplace, and in the quiet moments when I conversed with my Lord. From then on, this dream became an obsession; I posted so much about it that my friends would often reply with duas for me to make it to those blessed lands.

Towards the end of 2024, on December 23rd, I posted a story on my Instagram, a reel of Makkah, with the caption: “Dear 2025, surprise me with an Umrah trip.” I reposted it with my own caption: “Dear LORD of 2025,” but like many similar posts, I didn’t put much thought into it.

In early January, a wonderful sister, herein referred to as ‘Chairlady’ or ‘Chair,’ posted about an Umrah trip for women, and my heart immediately melted. I jokingly said, “Nibebeeeee hata kwa hendbeg,” (insert crying emoji). She laughed and replied, “Listen to me: make dua. How it happens? Leave it to Allah,” reminding me that for Allah, nothing is impossible. I quickly forgot about the conversation, though I continued my dua as usual.

About five months later, the Chairlady posted something along the lines of, “There’s a sister I talked to about Umrah some time ago, and she said she couldn’t afford the trip. If that sister is you, please DM me; I have a sponsor for you.” I must have reread that story a million times, trying to comprehend what she was saying. My heart raced, but I didn’t want to get ahead of myself. With shaky hands, I texted her, asking if she was referring to me or someone else. If it was someone else, I requested her to consider me for the next sponsorship opportunity.

I vividly remember sitting with my sisters on the floor during lunch, completely distracted. Finally, I received a response: “Luby! It’s you!!! I had forgotten who I had that conversation with, but it’s you!” I stood up quickly, leaving my sisters puzzled by my sudden movement. “What’s wrong?” they asked. I stayed quiet, my hands shaking intensely, struggling to find my voice. “Check whether your passport is valid and let me know right away.”

I walked into my mum’s room, half-smiling and half-teary. “Ma, where’s my passport?” I asked. “Why do you need it?” she replied. “I need to check something real quick.” She pointed to the drawer where the passport was stored. I quickly opened it, and lo and behold, it was valid! “What is it?” my mum asked again. “I…I…” The words just wouldn’t come out. “I got…a free…Umrah ticket.” Tears started to flow. “Allahu akbar! Mabrukk!” I hugged my parents tightly. “Why are you crying, though? You should be happy,” my dad said, typical of his old-fashioned responses. “It’s tears of joy,” I muttered between gasps for breath.

I then walked into the kitchen where my sisters were still eating, trying to gather myself. “I got a free Umrah ticket,” I announced. In an instant, their surprise transformed into shared joy, and we all began to cry. “Allahu akbar. Alhamdulillah.” Our gratitude and awe overwhelmed us, leaving us with little more to say. My mum quickly called my other sister and brother; with each new congratulation, my emotions deepened, and I began to sob even harder.

I never thought something this extraordinary could happen to me. It wasn’t that I doubted Allah’s ability; I just never expected to be so blessed myself. I cried and cried, amazed at how a casual conversation had turned into a realized dream. How could a stranger, who knew nothing about me, become the means of this miracle? Subhanallah, the subtle ways Allah arranges our affairs left me astounded. Grateful and still trembling with excitement, I shared with the lovely sister, “How am I supposed to live the next five months now?! I feel like I won’t be able to do anything but wait excitedly.” We shared a laugh, excited for the incredible trip that lay ahead of us.

The very first thing I did, as I awaited official confirmation of the trip, was buy a small A6 notebook for my duas. My first entry was a seven-page dua specifically for the Umrah, praying for it to actually happen, for energy and health, for ideal weather, for good companionship on the journey, and for answered prayers; you name it. Slowly but surely, I wrote down other duas over the months. I spoke to Allah more often, requesting Him to forgive me and make me worthy of this trip. I was very conscious not to sin or make any mistakes that would make me unworthy of it all. I poured my entire heart into it, painting a vivid picture of the kind of experience I wished for. That became my mantra for the next few months.

Next, I bought comfortable shoes and increased my daily step target. I wanted to be not just ready, but perfectly ready for this journey of a lifetime. Every morning, I would go to the tallest building at our workplace and walk up and down the steep staircase. If I didn’t have enough time for that morning routine, I’d try to make it up throughout the day. I wanted to get accustomed to the long walks around the Haram and Medina, and to be fit for it. I was determined; I wasn’t about to take this lifetime trip lightly.

Next, I started by watching umrah tutorials, learning about the do’s and don’ts, the best duas to recite, where to do laundry, and which apps would be useful. I downloaded the Nusuk and HHR train apps, even though it felt ridiculously early to do so. And, as we all know how Instagram picks up on our conversations, my feed and Explore page quickly filled with umrah-related reels and posts.

Also, in preparation for my trip to Madina, I began watching the Umar ibn Khattab series, as recommended by our Chair. This helped me better understand the locations we would be touring. I have heard so much about the tranquility and peace of Madina; Aaahhh! I truly couldn’t wait!

Then, I made a list of all the items I would need for my journey and began ticking them off one by one. At that time, everything revolved around umrah. All my conversations with my sisters and loved ones focused on the things I needed to get or do for the trip. It got to the point where I would say, “Aaah, look,” and my sisters would laugh and say, “For umrah, right?”

During this period, one frequent dua I made was for abundance, so I could comfortably prepare for and enjoy the trip. Subhanallah, Allah, the Most Generous, delivverreeeed! Miracles were unfolding right before my eyes. I was getting gigs left and right, and money was coming from unexpected places. Allah was facilitating every need, want, and wish. I was awed and deeply touched by Allah’s kindness towards me. It was really happening!

I remember about a month before the trip, I opened my suitcase and started packing small items one at a time. My younger sister, who had a journey coming up, laughed and said, “My trip is one week away, and I haven’t packed yet. Yours is a month away, and you’re already at it. Truly, there are two kinds of people in this world.” It’s no secret that I’m the ultimate planner, but trust me when I say I was still arranging my bag right up until the very last day. I wanted everything to be perfect. Typical, I know.

Despite my overwhelming excitement and extensive preparations over the months, I still hadn’t received official confirmation for the trip, which made me feel a bit nervous about whether it would go through. However, once it was confirmed, I couldn’t hide my joy any longer. Maybe I overdid it, but honestly, no one could comprehend how excited I was. This was about a month before the journey, and so I began texting my friends, loved ones, and everyone who had once carried my list of duas, eagerly telling them, “It’s now my turn to make dua for you in the blessed lands.”

I also informed my co-workers and asked for their forgiveness as I continued collecting duas. I ended up gathering over 50 pages of everyone’s duas. I know, I know lol, it seems like I was doing the most 😀 But guys! I was not about to be stingy with my prayers!

That night, as I nervously boarded my first plane to Nairobi, I whispered my last-minute duas, asking for this journey to be a positive turning point in my life. The one-hour flight passed quickly, and we soon landed at our destination.

As I was removing my backpack from the overhead compartment, my lovely sister, our Chairlady, called me. “Luby, did you see the texts?” I told her I had just landed and hadn’t read them yet. She then said something that left me speechless: “The agents said the system has been down, and they were unable to acquire the visas for us. Let me send an Uber to pick you up and bring you to my home.” Honestly, I don’t remember what I answered; my mind just went blank. I didn’t know what to think, say, or feel. My thoughts raced during the ride through the night.

I kept reminding myself of the words our Chairlady had said during the months of preparation: “Such spiritual trips always come with tests. No matter how much experience you have visiting the Holy lands, you will always be tested in one way or another. Be mentally prepared for that and be very patient with whatever comes.” I thought to myself, “Aha, this is what she was talking about. The tests have started. But we must stay optimistic. We must be patient.”

Our group chat was lighting up with messages expressing confusion, shock, and reminders to exercise patience and make dua. Our trip was scheduled to start at 2 AM that same night, and we all kept hoping for a miracle to happen at the last minute.

When I arrived, our Chairlady welcomed me with a long hug and a nervous laugh. The night felt long as we tried to make sense of what was happening, embracing the uncertainty and remaining patient as Allah’s plan unravelled.

The next morning, we gathered with our fellow sisters in our team. We poured our hearts out amid the chaos, reassuring each other that this was merely a phase. Allah is testing us, but He is planning something better for us. We constantly reminded one another, “Qadar Allahu wa ma sha’a fa’al” (Allah has decreed, and whatever He wills, He does).

I remember our Chair stating, “I wholeheartedly believe that there is a reason behind this delay, and Allah will reveal it to us eventually.” I added, “That’s true, but sometimes Allah tests us without providing closure. If that closure doesn’t come, that’s a test too, whether we will trust Him regardless.” For the next few days, Allah tested me on my own words.

Amidst apologies from the agents, confusion, and unclear next steps, we had no option but to wait. This became the most dreadful wait of my life.

My family and close friends continuously checked on me, sending encouraging words and beautiful reminders of Allah’s plan and the khayr in all delays. During this time, I stayed with my two lovely cousin sisters, who went above and beyond to accommodate me, comfort me, and cheer me up.

All the while, my heart was crumbling. I kept desperately speaking to Allah, saying, “Ya Allah, there must be a reason why You brought me to Nairobi. I didn’t leave home and arrive here for no reason. I know there must be a purpose. Please reveal it to me.”

For many years, I had wanted the opportunity to go to Nairobi for one significant mission in my life. When my trip brought me to a halt there, I thought maybe this was my chance; perhaps Allah wanted me to fulfill my mission. But that door was also tightly closed. It was painful trying to understand, “Why am I here then?!”, to accept and fully trust His plan. As much as I tried to smile, inside, my heart was falling apart.

At that time, despite the delay, we still held onto hope that we would be able to recover our money, obtain our visas, and travel immediately to salvage the remaining bookings we still had. So, the waiting continued. I kept myself busy by meeting old friends, spending time with my sister in law and beautiful nieces, and admiring the stunning purple Jacaranda trees outside the house; anything to keep my mind occupied.

I also had the chance to meet a lovely revert sister whom I had been in contact with for two years but had never met in person. It was such an emotional meeting for both of us. We talked, we cried (yes, she’s a crybaby, just like me), we hugged like we’d known each other forever. My cousin later told me, “Maybe your stay in Nairobi was for this reason: this beautiful meetup.” And you know what? Maybe, maybe she’s the sole reason I stayed in Nairobi. I was destined to meet this beautiful, beautiful soul, Allahumma bareek! Allah knows best, you know?

By the fifth day, as I sat at the dinner table with my two cousins, our Chair sent a voice note. As I listened, my heart raced. We had reached a dead end with the visas and had to cancel the trip while they sought legal ways to resolve the matter. I couldn’t pinpoint when the tears began to fall, but I remember the dreadful feeling of my heart sinking. What followed were the longest nights of my life. I used to think I understood what heartbreak was, but this? This was on another level. It was undoubtedly the most painful heartbreak I had ever experienced. Even as my loving cousins comforted me with Allah’s words and I recognized the truth in what they said, my heart felt like it was crumbling like a wet cookie; I was devastated.

Of course, the shaytan thrives in moments of brokenness. I began to descend into a dark rabbit hole of overthinking. Did I do something to cause Allah to take this away from me? The umrah I had waited and prayed for years for, the important family mission in Saudi Arabia, the significant personal mission in Nairobi, it felt like all the doors had not just been closed but slammed shut right in my face.

I didn’t know how to process the heavy feeling, the sadness, the grief, and the shock. How was I supposed to return to normal life after this?

I travelled back home two days later with a heavy heart, but I was glad to embrace my parents once again. However, one more major plan for the end of October also fell apart painfully. Honestly, it was a humbling moment.

The biggest lesson I learned from this experience is that, once again, I am NOT in control. Despite all the preparation I put into this trip, ultimately, it is Allah’s plan that prevails. And that plan? You have to trust it blindly, even when you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, even when it doesn’t make sense, and even when you don’t understand why things had to happen the way they did.

This situation reminds me of the quote: “The universe will give you the same lesson in different forms until you master it.”

As someone who continually struggles with letting fate unfold as it comes, this was a stark reminder for me.

Above all, I kept reminding myself of my sister, our Chair, who faced an even greater challenge in losing all her bookings and tickets. She was placed in a situation that no leader or person ever wishes to be in. Whenever I thought about my own grief, I had to remind myself of hers. Yet despite everything, I found her to be resilient, patient, and firm, with unwavering faith. Alhamdulillah ala kul hal. May Allah reward her abundantly for her patience and compensate her for every heartbreak, every tear, every pain and worry and every penny she lost, ameen. Please take a moment to make dua for her, and for the other sisters in our group who also underwent this heartbreaking experience. May we all be compensated with what is better in all ways, ameen.

One of my dear friends (God bless her beautiful soul), who helped me extensively in preparing for my journey, reminded me of the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and his companions set out for Makkah to perform Umrah, but they were turned away when they were so close to the sacred land and instructed to return the following year. Despite this setback, Allah reassured them, describing that moment in the Qur’an as “a clear victory.”

This experience felt like my own Hudaybiyyah moment. Although I didn’t arrive in Makkah for Umrah, I underwent a different kind of pilgrimage in my heart. It’s a comforting perspective to hold.

It’s been 31 nights, and my suitcase still sits across my bed, mostly unpacked. My Nusuk app is still on. Umrah content still fills my Instagram explore page. Some may say it is denial. Some may say it is hope. I don’t really know where to place it; maybe somewhere in between the two. I really don’t know. In shaa Allah kheyr. In shaa Allah, it shall be well.

***

P.S. Regardless of everything that has happened, I will always be grateful to the stranger, my favourite stranger, who sponsored this trip for me. I also want to thank our Chair, whom Allah chose to be the reason I received this opportunity. I am deeply appreciative of my cousins, my sister in law, my closest friends, my loved ones, and my entire family, who went above and beyond to support me during this challenging time. May Allah bless you all in ways that will truly astonish everyone on this earth and in the heavens. Ameen.

P.S. 2: As I continued to navigate through this storm, my elder sister sent me a beautiful and soothing series on the Names of Allah by Ustadh Hisham Abu Yusuf. It has been a profound and timely reminder for me. I realize that to find peace of mind amidst life’s challenges, we first need to deeply comprehend who Allah truly is. I share this with you in the hope that it comforts you just as it has been comforting to me: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSFZjjKC3qPYGLinbi1XurRSC3izxodtC

by
Keep Reading
Creative Non-Fiction

MY OTHER HALF (Part 4)

By

To read part 3, click on the following link: https://lubnah.me.ke/my_other_half_part_3/

Assalam aleykuuuum my beloved Ghost!

Ghost, because where are you hiding since the first letter, 10 YEARS BACK?! And 5 years since the last letter. Never mind the silence, because I’m pretty sure you’ve come across this thing called AdULTinG and by now, very familiar with all the oddities that come with it. Anyway, that aside; 5 years, hmm?

Our last conversation was during the pandemic, and now we find ourselves watching the Global Sumud Flotilla head toward Gaza, defying sea blockades to bring hope and aid. As Israeli forces intercept some ships, I pray, may Allah save Gaza and its people, grant steadfastness to those aboard, and may we live to see justice and freedom for them. How the times change, huh?

I too, have changed immensely. Time does a lot to you. You hurt. You cry. You heal. You learn. You unlearn. You make mistakes. You hurt again. An endless cycle of pain and growth. Looking back, I vividly remember when my plan was to get married by 21 years of age (the time of my first letter), latest 23. I’m telling you, I had this beautiful plan all laid out (A moment of silence for broken dreams 😀 ) Everyone close to me knew I LOVED and CRAVED motherhood. I always wanted to be a young mother. It did always feel like I was on this earth solely to become a mother. But God had other plans innit?

By now, I’ve heard it all. I’m too choosy. I am hiding myself. I am JUST scared. I am being difficult about this. I’ve definitely got a problem. I’ve been afflicted with hasad. I need ruqya. And as my beloved aunt once said, “Labda uko na shetwani” 😀 I’m sure ladies above 30 very well know these tales quite too well. I’ve been kept in uncomfortable situations and I have been interrogated for my lack of a husband, more than anything in my life.

Some months back, an old friend called after many years of not talking and obviously, they asked whether I had a husband yet. And when I said no, the response was, “Hujataka (you JUST haven’t wanted it i.e. marriage)”. Because obviously, I am this super woman who can move the earth to her liking 😀 Astaghfirullah. It obviously hurt, because I think it is so easy to judge based on what is apparent, but you truly never have an idea on what someone is really going through. But I pondered on that statement for a long time. “Hujataka.” Do people truly understand qadar? Like truly? Because on one side, each one of us has free will and we do have the liberty to make choices in our lives, but do we truly comprehend Allah’s power in all this?

It reminds me of a close friend who was always strong willed; she always knew what she wanted and she would go for it. Then came a time when her parents forced her to marry an older man that she didn’t want. She FOUGHT against the marriage. Fought and fought and fought. Eventually, she gave in. I remember walking into her home where the family gathering was taking place, and I saw her dancing freely before she saw me and came to hug me. My heart broke for her. We were both still very young, but I think that was the first instance that it struck me how qadar works. This beautiful, amazing girl that I knew would have never accepted this marriage, but she gave in. She accepted her fate. Not because she wanted to, but she had to. If something is meant to happen, it will happen, regardless of your thoughts, feelings, opinions about it. It will happen even if we scream at the top of our lungs or run away or try to hide. It will happen. Simply because this is what is written. It may be a blessing, it may be a test, it may be a blessing disguised as a test. All in all, it will happen whether you like it or not. And that’s just how firm my belief in qadar is.

On the other hand, I see how my friends’ eyes light up, or the excitement in my family’s voices, whenever I say I have good news. There’s that pause, that wide smile, that hopeful glance; like finally, this must be the announcement they’ve all been waiting for. And then when it turns out to be something else, like a new project, a trip, or even something big that I’m genuinely proud of, I can almost sense the drop in their faces. It comes from a good, concerned place, wishing me nothing but wellness and kheyr, but I almost feel bad for them; because in their eyes, all these other joys seem smaller. It’s like, if I just do this ONE THING, JUST THIS ONE THING, then everything will have fallen into place. But is that really the reality?

As someone who’s very emotional and attached, I do see the wisdom in Allah’s plan for me. It may be as everyone keeps saying, maybe I’m proud and too choosy and too scared and perhaps the ruqya is very necessary, I still absolutely believe that there is good in the delay.

Looking back, I am not who I was 5 or 10 years ago. I was struggling to control my BIG emotions. I was struggling to be okay alone, to embrace my own company without feeling incomplete. I was struggling to stand for myself. And to be honest, I think that despite my very good intentions, I wouldn’t have been the ideal wife and mother I’ve always hoped to be. Over time, however, I’ve learned that my seasons of solitude were not a punishment, but a gentle shaping by Allah; teaching me independence, patience, and self-reliance. Alhamdulilah for the timing. I may not be where I once imagined, but I trust I am exactly where I need to be.

With the little experience I’ve had raising my nephews, I’ve watched myself fall short far too many times. At the same time, I’ve seen my growth. Just recently, my two nephews left home with a friend without informing anyone. We looked around the neighbourhood, all their normal play areas, they were nowhere to be seen. It was around lunch hour and I could feel my anxiety kicking in. The wild thoughts. What if they get lost? What if they get kidnapped? What if someone harms them?😀 I know, I know, the mind of an anxious person is as wild as the thoughts 😀 But instead of entertaining those thoughts, I kept myself busy. I then overheard their mum say, “If they’re not back by Asr prayer, I’ll have to go search for them at the outskirts of our neighbourhood.” I thought to myself, “Good idea. I’ll give myself time until Asr, if they’re not back, I can start panicking at that time.” When Asr finally came, we saw them from our window, at the entrance of the masjid, taking wudhu. Phew! Alhamdulilah. Laughing now, I said to their mother, “I have grown.” She nodded, “Yes you have.” For other people, it may seem like a very small deal, but for me? It is major growth. The fact that I wasn’t already crying? That I didn’t shout when they came back? Aaaah, alhamdulilah for growth.

But it’s not just that, you know? I once traveled with my sisters for a few days, something we rarely do. When we came back, my mother had spent the whole day with us, quietly excited, having already cooked our favorite meals. She listened intently as we shared every little detail of our trip, asking gentle questions, smiling at our stories, because she had genuinely missed us. And when I laid my head on my father’s chest, he held me firmly. Whenever I tried to pull away, he held me tighter and longer, as if he wanted to make sure I felt completely safe and at home. And mahn, this is rizq too, one we often overlook. Love from parents? Alhamdulilah.

And then there’s the love of my siblings, the shared laughter, the quiet understanding, the way we just get each other without words. That bond, that companionship, is its own kind of gift. We may not always say it out loud, but in these small moments together, it’s felt deeply.

Sometimes I think maybe Allah just wants us to have more time together. He knows how my mother, who was separated from her children from her first marriage for decades, still needs her babies. He knows how my firm father, who learned softness from his daughters, still needs us. And we, of course, need their love and supportive presence too.

This doesn’t mean that marriage is the end of our relationship with our parents. But God knows, the day I leave their home, I’ll cryyyyyyy buckets. I know it. My parents know it. My siblings and friends know it. They even joke about how on my wedding day, I’ll probably cry as if I’m bereaved or being forced into marriage. We all know it. I’m still chudren 😀

And it’s in these moments of love, parents, siblings, family, that I realize Allah hasn’t deprived me. He’s just written my story differently.

The comments obviously hurt, however well intentioned they are. But my God has been there for me in ways that I can never afford to doubt His plan for me. It might be painful. Especially as someone who’s had a lot of health issues almost all her life, because it does scare me that I might fail myself and my marriage and my kids. But mahn, God has been too merciful to me, I cannot afford to doubt Him. It might be a longer route to my destination but I am sure, this is the best way for me to get where I want to be.

Anyway, husbandry, I hope you’re going through your own polishing stage and in shaa Allah we get to meet as the best versions of ourselves. They say this life has no formula, but my belief is that the only formula is to involve Allah in every step and stage in your life in such a way that you are confident that anything that happens or doesn’t happen, is by Him, and His Great Wisdom. We gotta trust.

May Allah polish our hearts, protect us from harm, and bring us together in the best of ways. May He write gentleness into our stories, keep our parents safe in His mercy, and let our hearts find peace in whatever He decrees. And when the time is right, may He allow us to meet with hearts refined by patience, strengthened by faith, and overflowing with gratitude.

And as we reflect on the patience and steadfastness of the Palestinians, may Allah grant them relief, ease their suffering, and bless them with victory sooner than soon.

For real now, may this be the last letter till we meet in shaa Allah. Till then, be good and you better behave!

Fi amanillah!

by
Keep Reading
Deen (Religion)

ONCE AGAIN, A TIME FOR REFLECTION

By

So here you are, dear reader. You’ve fasted for an entire month despite the intense heat. You’ve given charity even amidst economic difficulties. You’ve stayed up at night for Taraweeh and sacrificed your sleep for Tahajjud, pushing through your exhaustion for the sake of Allah. Congratulations! May Allah accept your efforts and reward you abundantly for all your sacrifices.

As you move forward, cherish what you’ve achieved this month. Carry the lessons learned, the perseverance gained, the zeal displayed, and the inspiration felt into the coming months. Ramadan may be over, but the Lord of Ramadan remains with us.

This is a reminder to continue the good deeds you’ve practiced. Apply everything you learned from the khutbahs and darsas. Strive to be God-conscious in all that you do. Speak to Allah sincerely and intimately; He is always close to you, even after Ramadan.

Let’s commit to evolving as more faithful individuals from this moment forward. May we not be in the same position when the next Ramadan comes around. This is the challenge that lies ahead of us.

اللهم تَقَبَّلْ صِيَامَنَا وَقِيَامَنَا وَاعْتِق رِقَابَنَا مِنَ النَّارِ وَاجْعَل رَمَضَانَ شَاهِدًا لَنَا لَا عَلَيْنَا وَلَا تَجْعَلْهُ آخِرَ عَهْدِنَا وَبَلِّغْنَا رَمَضَانَ أَعْوَامًا عَدِيدَة

Ya Allah, accept our fasting and prayers, forgive our shortcomings, free us from the Fire and make Ramadan a witness for us, not against us; do not make this our last Ramadan, and grant us many more Ramadans in the future, ameen.

***

I sincerely thank you for taking the time to read my reflections; it means a great deal to me. Eid Mubarak to everyone! May your celebrations be brimming with joy, abundant blessings (barakah), and a deep sense of brotherhood. I hope you create beautiful memories surrounded by loved ones, enjoying festive meals and the warmth of shared laughter. Ameen.

by
Keep Reading
Deen (Religion)

ALLAH’S REDIRECTION

By

Four years ago, a friend texted me. She was frustrated. Angry. Disappointed. She was beyond crushed that Allah had not responded to her desperate dua, despite her efforts, despite going out of her way, despite begging Allah. She had done all that is in the books. She had fulfilled her daily prayers, she had woken for tahajjud every single night, she had opened her heart bear and cried to Allah to fulfill just this one thing for her, yet He didn’t. Why would Allah let her down in this way?

Before you judge her reaction harshly, here is a bit of context. My friend had had the worst childhood you’ve probably heard of in real life. Physical abuse, emotional abuse, psychological and perhaps some would even name what she’d gone through to be plain torture. That in turn, made her, in many many way, wounded and traumatized. She didn’t know affection or love or warmth nor did she know how to give it. She had a distant, somewhat cold, relationship with herself, her family, her children and by extension, Allah.

That wasn’t all of it. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and she extremely struggled with her self esteem, anxiety and depression.

And amidst all this madness as she calls it, there was only one person who knew how to ground her; her grandmother. The only person she felt seen, loved, appreciated. The only single person in the whole world who made this life a little bit bearable. While her entire journal would be about the voices in her head, the burden of this life, the only single beautiful thing she ever wrote about was her grandmother. And I don’t say this cause she just told me, I read those pieces (with her permission of course). Despite her claim of inability to love, it was clear that she could give her whole life to her grandmother. The only apparent light in her seemingly dark, dark life.

But during covid, her grandmother died. That was the first devastation.  Then the following year, she lost a baby. It was too painful. Too heavy. Too crashing.

The next time she was pregnant, she did what she wouldn’t normally do. Talk to Allah more intimately. Begging him for this one thing, and this one thing alone. She wanted a baby boy this time round. So she religiously woke up every single night asking Allah for a boy. She dedicated all her time and energy, getting closer to Allah, trying to mend whatever was left of it, so her dua could be accepted.

After a series of very difficult pregnancies, this became the only normal pregnancy she’d ever experienced. Yet when she gave birth, it was a girl once again. She was angry. disappointed. Crashed. She felt little connection to her and would sometimes wish she never had her. That lack of motherly affection was close to none.

She didn’t really have much care for this baby. Not really. But alas, there is always wisdom in everything that Allah gives us or denies us.

Despite having other daughters, this baby was a special one. She was charming. She was affectionate. She was smart. Simply adorable. And Somehow, just somehow, slowly she was able to draw her mother out of the darkness she’d been accustomed to. She became her best friend, the coolness of her eyes, her whole heart.

Against all odds, this baby that she once detested her existence became her anchor. The one who grounds her now. My friend speaks of how her baby reminds her of her grandmother so much. From her features to how she projects so much love towards her. It is like Allah replaced her grandmother with this cute baby who now keeps her grounded. Oh how fondly she talks of this girl. It is like she was sent just to save her from the darkness she lives in.

And all this has got me thinking of that quote that says, “Every perceived rejection is a redirection for the best.” Perhaps my friend thought if she only got a boy, her heart will be at peace, one that she desperately seeks. Yet, sometimes Allah withholds what we want so that we can get what we actually need, what would actually be the best for us.

Despite all her rough background and turbulent present, Allah still brings her someone to anchor her at each stage of her life.  If that isn’t Allah’s mercy on play subhanallah.

This in many ways reflects what The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

“I am amazed by the believer. Verily, Allah does not decree anything for the believer except what is good for him.”* (Musnad Ahmad 12495)

It’s truly moving to think that just four years ago, my friend would have struggled to believe that this baby—someone she found it difficult to accept—would grow to be her closest companion and play a significant role in healing her heart. Yet, here we are, witnessing a beautiful transformation. This little one has undeniably become her greatest gift, truly the light of her life. With each hug and embrace, she finds a deep sense of peace, and her worries seem to fade away. It’s so heartwarming to see how their bond brings out the best in each other, filling her with immense gratitude for this unexpected joy that has entered her life.

Dear Reader,

I want to take a moment to remind you that amidst the myriad challenges life presents, whether they come in the form of difficult trials or moments of doubt regarding unanswered prayers, and even in the sadness of loss, there is a profound truth that remains: Allah has a uniquely tailored plan for you. This divine plan may not always align with your hopes and desires, but it might just be what your heart and soul truly need for growth and healing.

As you navigate through life’s uncertainties, hold on to this empowering thought: “But it may be that you dislike something that is actually good for you, and it may be that you love something that is ultimately bad for you. Allah knows, while you do not.”

Reflect on the times when you faced disappointments that later revealed hidden blessings. Consider how moments that once felt like setbacks transformed into opportunities for personal growth, deeper understanding, or new paths that led you to unexpected joy. Embrace the presence of Allah’s wisdom as it gently guides you, even when the way ahead seems unclear.

Trust in this process and let yourself be open to the unfolding of Allah’s will in your life. Embrace it fully, knowing that every twist and turn serves a purpose beyond your immediate understanding. There is beauty in surrendering to the journey that Allah has laid out for you.

Most importantly, remember: It is not a rejection. It is but a beautiful redirection.

by
Keep Reading
Deen (Religion)

IN HIS WATCHFUL EYES

By

One topic that deeply resonates with me is Qadar (fate). It’s truly fascinating to reflect on how Allah orchestrates our lives, reminding us of our own limitations and the unpredictability of our journeys. In moments when I find it difficult to comprehend Allah’s plans for me, especially when circumstances don’t align with my expectations, I often think back to a deep story I witnessed. It’s the story of a young believing woman, and her experiences are ones that many of us can relate to.

Imagine a 33-year-old woman living abroad with her parents in a big city. Her family cherished her deeply, but like many singles her age, she felt the weight of loneliness and societal pressure. At 33, it is often considered “old,” and the idea of an “expiration date” for finding a partner seemed more pronounced back then than it does now. Despite receiving many proposals since she was 18, none of them worked out for various reasons. Nevertheless, she remained steadfast in her trust in Allah’s divine plan.

When she turned 33 years old, she earnestly prayed for a spouse. Subhanallah, one night at 2 a.m., she poured her heart out to Allah about her desire for a partner. After her prayers, just after Fajr, her sister called to inform her that there were three proposals, subhanallah. A week before her engagement, she received another proposal. Fast forward, she got married at the age of 33 and moved to a rural area in a different country. It was a completely new life, filled with a different environment and culture far from home, but she embraced it with faith and excitement for her new journey.

Things took a sour turn soon after the wedding when her husband revealed that “his heart just couldn’t accept her,” despite her being a perfect wife and diligently fulfilling all her duties. Imagine the shock, heartbreak, confusion, and loneliness she felt—Subhanallah. Despite her deep efforts, prayers, and ruqya to improve her relationship with him, all was in vain as he ignored her and paid no attention to her at all.

Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala destined that she would become pregnant. In normal circumstances, this would have been an extremely joyous moment for the newlyweds. However, with an indifferent husband, there was little joy to be found. During those first two months, life was hell for the young woman. She had no idea how quickly and dramatically her circumstances had changed. However, this was not the end of her struggles. Allah tested her once more with an experience that every woman dreads: she had a miscarriage. As she mourned the loss of her unborn child and reflected on her troubled marriage, she returned to her family home. It was at that moment that her husband chose to end their marriage.

The lady was devastated. What would people say about a girl who got divorced after only two months of marriage? What would they think of her? They might assume that something must be very wrong with her. Who would want to marry someone like that again? She fell into despair. However, her family provided her with strong support, offering a shoulder to lean on and encouraging her to accept it as the qadar of Allah, reminding her that He knows best. Very slowly she healed. But the idea of marriage was totally deleted from her mind. For her, she felt like that was the end of her marriage chapter and that no one would accept her as a wife again.

Three years later, the lady visited her family. While there, she saw her sibling’s children and felt a deep yearning for motherhood and the warmth of having a family. That night, she returned to her prayer mat and cried out to Allah, asking for a new spouse—one who would be better than her ex-husband in every way. She only prayed that one night, not expecting anything to come of it. However, shortly after, there was a burial for a close uncle, and during the gathering, some ladies who were friends of her cousin, came to offer their condolences. They interacted briefly with her, and when they returned home, they spoke to a single man from their community about the lady they had met that day. Subhanallah, just one week later, a proposal came from the man, and she got married a month after that.

And Good Lord, the difference between her first and second husband was like heaven and earth. Subhanallah. She got the love, the respect, the friendship, the care that she prayed for for too long. She calls it a miracle and indeed it is one.

Whenever this story comes to mind I am in awe at how Allah meticulously plans our Affairs. And even when we don’t understand why things go the way they do, we gotta believe that He knows best. That He is merciful towards us even in the darkest of situations. For example, this young lady prayed istikhara in both cases of first and second husband. So her going through the first unhappy marriage was a test from Allah. And perhaps she needed to go through that experience, that pain, that heartbreak to be able to truly appreciate the huge blessing she is currently in. You bet that every time she thinks of her past and her present and sees the difference, she is moved by Allah’s mercy towards her. And her second marriage is both a blessing and a test. Will she be grateful for what Allah has bestowed upon her?

As human beings, we sometimes wonder why Allah doesn’t just grant us blessings from the start. Why does He test us first? No one can provide a definitive answer to this question, as
only Allah understands the divine secrets of life and the wisdom behind each stage we go through. We may think we are ready to handle the blessings Allah wants to bestow upon us,
but can we be sure? Perhaps through every loss, every moment of anguish, and every
lesson learned, we become wiser and grow into the best versions of ourselves, ultimately
preparing to receive those blessings.

As such, whatever pain you are going through right now, whether of marriage, wanting children, wanting a better job, or good health…do have yaqeen (firm belief) that you are exactly where Allah wants you to be. In Allah’s books, there is no delay, nor is there a rush. Everything has an appointed term. So does this hardship. It will not last forever. And Allah is in charge.

Additionally, we learn that there is always a reward for patience. Do you notice your poor health, loneliness, and poverty? Allah will compensate you for all of it. This may happen in a few weeks or even years, but it is a promise from Him. With every difficulty, there is ease. Even in the sad situation you find yourself in, He still cares for you in other ways. Never forget that and never despair. This is your reminder to slow down, to breathe, to have hope, and to believe without a doubt that there is calm after the storms.

Side Note: This is a reminder for our community to be considerate of one another. Let’s avoid being judgmental, shaming, or mocking those who are divorced, unmarried, or childless. In fact, we should simply avoid dwelling on what isn’t our business. We can never fully understand the challenges others have faced or are currently facing.

Beloved reader, as we conclude,  I want you to hold onto this verse. Keep it close to your heart. Memorize it if you can. Let this be your guiding light even in the darkest of nights: “So be patient with your Lord’s decree, for you are truly under Our ˹watchful˺ Eyes. And glorify the praises of your Lord when you rise.” (Qur’an 52:48) Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala is our guardian, caretaker, and handler of our affairs. Who else would you rather have to manage your affairs than Him?

“Had Allah lifted the veil for his slave and shown him how He handles his affairs for him, and how Allah is keener for the benefit of the slave than his own self, his heart would have melted out of love for Allah and would have torn to pieces out of thankfulness to Allah. Therefore if the pains of this world tire you, do not grieve. For it may be that Allah yearns to hear your voice by way of du’a. So pour out your desires in prostration and forget about it and know that verily Allah does not forget.” ― Ibn Al Qayyim.

by
Keep Reading
Deen (Religion)

HE IS AL LATEEF

By

“No vision can encompass Him, but He encompasses all vision. For He is the Most Subtle, All-Aware.” (Surah Al-Anam, Verse 103)

I used to hear about Allah’s name, Al-Lateef. I always understood that it encompasses His gentleness, graciousness, kindness, and subtlety. While I recognized these attributes, I often remained unaware of experiencing them in my life. Sometimes we don’t see it; we fail to notice how Allah delicately arranges our affairs for our own good. He is the Master of the Game of Cards, with every move made for a reason—very intentional and well thought out.

The significance of the name Al-Lateef dawned on me during a particular phase in my life when I started a new job role. After years of searching and hustling for employment, this moment was monumental for me—an answered prayer for something I had yearned for quite a while. However, as soon as I began the job, challenges started piling up one after another. It was overwhelming, and I felt so alone. I struggled internally, feeling I would be ungrateful to complain, since Allah had given me what I wanted. How could I dare to complain? I decided to embrace the experience as a test from Allah. I had received what I desired; would I be able to endure the minor discomforts that came with this blessing?

My primary colleague, regrettably, chose to complicate my work life. There was always a problem with him; it was evident that I was not welcome. I began to wonder if it was because of my religion, ethnicity, or my seemingly youthful appearance. I often found myself in tears and experienced embarrassing meltdowns at work on several occasions. At times, I felt so drained—mentally, physically, and emotionally—that I would sit under my desk for a brief moment to regain my composure. All I wished for was some ease.

About two months later, a new, young, and vibrant intern joined our team, straight from University. I was tasked with being his supervisor and teaching him the required skills. The first thing I noticed was that our values and personalities aligned, which made working with him easy. Furthermore, he possessed all the skills I needed in a team. It was also refreshing that he was passionate about our work and eager to learn new things. Gradually, I relied less on my challenging colleague and worked more closely with the intern. In my mind, I kept thinking, “This kid must be a Godsend. This is from Allah’s mercy.”

Then one day, the intern reached out to thank me for mentoring him and all the many things he had learned. During our conversation, he casually mentioned, “You know, I didn’t even study Communication. I studied Diplomacy. The Public Service Commission had placed me as an intern in a public office in Nairobi. However, the letter I received told me to come to this office in Mombasa. So technically, I wasn’t supposed to be here. According to the public service portal, I am actually in Nairobi! But here we are! In fact, my friends laughed when they heard I was working in a Communication office, considering I am very quiet, shy, and reserved. They still can’t believe I’m here, getting out of my comfort zone…”

Subhanallah, the way this information blew my mind was extraordinary. Truly, Allah is subtle in how He handles our affairs, always doing so with care and gentleness. There was no mistake; the intern was precisely where he was meant to be. He learned from me something he never thought he could do, and, for me, I received the assistance I desperately needed.

This experience has been a powerful reminder of how Allah extends His mercy and kindness to us, sometimes in a subtle manner. When the intern’s contract ended this February, I felt an immense void and work became increasingly challenging. Then, on the first Friday of this Ramadhan, a bright and cheerful young lady entered our office asking for directions. I pointed her the way, and when she asked for my name, her reaction caught me off guard. “Oh! My lecturer said I remind him of you and encouraged me to seek your guidance!”

We exchanged phone numbers, and I continued my day without much thought about it. The following Friday, during a meaningful conversation, she opened up about her struggles to join the university. As we spoke, she expressed, “I really want to learn from you. I have plenty of free time and live nearby. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you ever need help. I’m here for you.”

It wasn’t just her words, but the way she expressed them that brought tears to my eyes. The number of times she repeated, “I am here for you,” felt like a deeply intentional message, as if she had been sent specifically for me. Just when I thought I was back at square one, Allah introduced me to another extraordinary soul who shares my principles and values and is ready to support me. She even signed up as a volunteer in our department to receive training. But to me, she represents a God-sent relief. Subhanallah. Alhamdulilah.

I often reflect on these incidents. Allah showers us with His mercy amidst trials. While it may not always be obvious, there are always ways in which He supports us, making life just a bit more bearable. He grants us ease in the most challenging situations and sends kind people to help us. Subhanallah, nothing is a coincidence. Everything that happens to us is part of His intricate plan, filled with mercy. He never overlooks anything and continues to bestow upon us His favours in such a way that we do not see or feel.

Reflecting on your own life, you will likely recognize numerous instances where Allah has showered you with affection and kindness, even when everything around you seemed dark and bleak. In moments when you feel like the situation is the worst it could possibly be, always remember that He is Al-Lateef. He does more for you than you could ever comprehend.

When your heart is shattered and you want to call upon Him, remember to invoke this beautiful name: “Ya Lateef…” Ask for His care, gentleness, and affection. He is already showering you with these blessings without your asking; imagine the abundance if you actually seek it from Him.

***

اللهم يا لطيف، الطف بنا فيما جرت به المقادير، وسهّل لنا أمورنا، واغمر قلوبنا بلطفك ورحمتك، واجعل لنا من كل همّ فرجًا، ومن كل ضيق مخرجًا، وارزقنا من حيث لا نحتسب، واشملنا بعفوك وكرمك، إنك على كل شيء قدير.

Transliteration:
Allahumma ya Lateef, ultuf bina fima jarat bihi al-maqadeer, wa sahhil lana umoorana, waghmir quloobana bilutfika wa rahmatika, waj‘al lana min kulli hammin farajan, wa min kulli dayqin makhrajan, warzuqna min haythu la nahtasib, washmilna bi‘afwika wa karamika, innaka ‘ala kulli shay’in qadeer.

Translation:
“O Allah, O The Most Subtle, be gentle with us in what You have decreed, ease our affairs, fill our hearts with Your kindness and mercy, grant us relief from every worry, an escape from every hardship, provide for us from where we do not expect, and envelop us in Your pardon and generosity. Indeed, You are capable of all things.”

May Al-Lateef bless you and all those around you with His infinite gentleness, mercy, and hidden blessings.

by
Keep Reading
2025 Exclusive Ramadhan Musings

EVEN WHEN YOU HATE IT, YOUR JOB IS AN AMANAH!

By

إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ يُحِبُّ إِذَا عَمِلَ أَحَدُكُمْ عَمَلًا أَنْ يُتْقِنَهُ

“Allah loves to see his servant who does a job with itqan (meticulously).”  (Al-Mu’jam Al-Awsat lit-Tabrani)

As a perfectionist, this hadith resonates deeply with me. It’s a clear affirmation: YES! It should be this way! Efficiency, proficiency, integrity, and excellence are essential to Islamic work ethics. However, when we reflect on our sincerity, do we truly give 100% in our jobs or settle for the bare minimum?

The answer may be a resounding YES for self-employed individuals, but the real question pertains to those who are employed or contracted. When we examine the work culture in Mombasa and across our country, we often encounter a mentality of “doing the bare minimum.” This mindset also extends to individuals who sell low-quality products or provide subpar services to others.

I understand why this mindset exists. Working hours can be exhausting, and the work environment may be challenging. Sometimes, bosses can be demotivating or even harsh, which makes it difficult to feel inspired to put forth our best effort. As a result, many people perform their tasks just enough to get by, and some may not complete their responsibilities at all.

However, it’s essential to recognize that our work is, in fact, an amanah (trust).

When someone hires you or calls you for an interview, and among several other candidates, they choose to trust you with that role, it is considered an amanah (trust). This is something for which you will be held accountable. Regardless of whether you are a teacher, car dealer, nurse, or secretary, you will be questioned about how well you fulfilled your responsibilities.

Our religion is perfect and we have values, principles and ethics in every single aspect of our lives. When you overcharge a person due to their naivety, Allah knows. You lie and give fake excuses to miss out on work days, Allah sees. You accept bribes to do what you shouldn’t be doing, Allah is fully aware. You intentionally do shoddy work because you simply don’t care, Allah cares. You purposely waste time during work hours, avoiding the actual responsibility, it is all written down.

It doesn’t matter if you are the ideal Muslim who prays the obligatory prayers and the tahajjud, fasts on all the sunnah days, and goes to Umrah every year. If your good manners and work ethic do not reflect these practices, then something is still missing.

Remember, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) received the proposal from Khadija bint Khuwaylid not only because of his exemplary manners but also because of his excellence and diligence in conducting business.

Diligence is highly encouraged in Islam, as demonstrated in the hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). He said, “If the Hour comes while one of you has a shoot that he is able to plant, then he should plant it.” [Ahmad, Al-Bukhari in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad]

Take a moment to reflect on the gravity of this hadith. Imagine it is the Day of Judgment; there is panic and chaos everywhere, and everyone is filled with fear about what lies ahead. It is a time of immense anxiety and confusion. Yet, the Prophet still advises that if you have the opportunity to plant a tree, you should go ahead and do it i.e. finish your task!

One question I often ask myself when I take on a new role is, “Do I truly deserve every dollar I earn from this job?” At the end of the day, can I honestly say that I have delivered or even exceeded expectations? I believe many of us lack taqwa (the fear of Allah) in our work because we tend to view this life as purely worldly, thinking that it doesn’t really matter to Allah. However, it actually does.

In the case that you believe you are doing more than what you are being paid for, take comfort in the Prophet’s assurance: “Help from Allah comes to the servant according to his diligence.” [Imam Al-Bazzar]

I know a man who started his career as a cleaner at the university. Today, he serves as a lecturer and holds an important leadership position at the same institution. There are many similar stories we have encountered over the years. For instance, another man began his journey as a cleaner at a bank and eventually became the manager. These successes come first from Allah and are followed by the effort and dedication that individuals put into their work. It is clear that if you strive sincerely, Allah will elevate your status.

Some people argue that the lack of respect and appreciation in their workplaces justifies abandoning Islamic work ethics. However, we must remember that our religion instructs us to treat others and act according to Islamic teachings, regardless of how others behave. We should not wait for humans to reward, appreciate, or acknowledge us before we strive to do our best. Indeed, everything we do should be done with Ihsan, for the sake of Allah, and ultimately to seek His pleasure.

Just as there was a time when people preferred to do business with Muslims, trusting that they would act honestly and not deceive others, let us also cultivate a culture of diligence and excellent work ethics.Let us be an example to society. Let people yearn to do work as we do, and be rather confident in working with us because ultimately, they know that Muslims deliver.

It is true that work is exhausting and draining especially in these tough economic times, but before you decide to lower your effort and do the bare minimum, remember that Allah has favoured you immensely by giving you a halal source of rizq that many wish for. I recently came across a tweet that hit me hard, it said, “Alhamdulilah for the exhaustion of work.” See all that sweat, all that fatigue? Many would die for a chance to experience it. So alhamdulilah always.

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allah have mercy upon him) said:

The sages of every nation agree that welfare cannot be obtained through welfare, that anyone who prefers comfort will miss it, and that joy and pleasure depend on the level of risks and difficulties that are experienced when getting them. There is no joy for a person who has no resolve; no pleasure for a person who lacks patience; no bliss for a person who endures no hardships; and no comfort for a person who has no hard work. If a person is exhausted for a short time, he will relax for longer. If he endures difficulties for a short while, this will lead him to eternal welfare. People who will receive eternal delight [the people of Paradise] earned this status due to their patience in this very short worldly life. Truly, Allah alone gives help, and there is no power except in Him.

The loftier one’s own self is and the higher his aspirations are, the more a person’s body is exhausted and the less his comfort is. Yahya ibn Katheer (may Allah have mercy upon him) said. “Knowledge cannot be acquired when the body is in comfort.” [Muslim]

“All those who are sensible undoubtedly believe that perfect comfort depends on the level of exhaustion, and perfect bliss relies on the level of difficulties that are endured when achieving it. Comfort, pleasure, and bliss are free of exhaustion only in Paradise, not in this worldly life. [Quoted from ‘Uluw Al-Himmah by Shaykh Muhammad ibn Isma`il]

As we wrap up this bit, do have it in mind that even if you absolutely hate your work or your boss or your workmates, your job is an Amanah, and you shall be questioned about it. In the same way, you shall be rewarded for your hard work and efficiency. Stay diligent good people!

Also, here is a short yet beautiful reminder of how to become your best self, at work and in life in general; https://youtu.be/BhYvXJ3VtNc?si=sa6sNwTwqji_Id04

by
Keep Reading
2025 Exclusive Ramadhan Musings

THE ART OF GENTLENESS IN ISLAM

By

To a great extent, many of us have embraced the global social media community. Within this realm, we share lessons, absorb influences, and sometimes face pressures that challenge our character. In a world where fighting, insulting, and mocking have become all too easy, where silence is misinterpreted as weakness, and gentleness mistaken for stupidity, let us hold close the wisdom of the Prophet, peace be upon him.

Ibn Mas’ud (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Shall I not tell you whom the (Hell) Fire is forbidden to touch? It is forbidden to touch a man who is always accessible, having a polite and tender nature.” (Riyad as-Salihin 641)

Today, we find ourselves in an environment where conflict, resentment, and the tarnishing of others’ dignity over trivial mistakes have become alarmingly commonplace. This normalization has created a troubling culture where starting fights, whether in person or online, seems almost routine. We often underestimate the impact of our words and actions, particularly when directed at strangers, perhaps believing that anonymity shields us from accountability.

However, we must confront the reality that the emotional pain inflicted by online mockery is just as profound as that felt in face-to-face interactions. The sting of ridicule or harsh criticism can linger, affecting individuals deeply, regardless of the medium through which it is delivered. It raises an essential question: why do we assume that our actions on digital platforms lack significance? The truth is that every comment, every taunt, and every insult contributes to a broader culture of hostility, and we need to recognize and take responsibility for how our words can impact others.

This is dedicated to those gentle souls who often face judgment for their compassionate nature. This is your gentle reminder that embodying the principle of being the bigger person aligns perfectly with the teachings of the Sunnah. You should not be seen as foolish, naive, or weak for choosing to step back from conflict. In fact, your decision to refrain from engaging in battles, to restrain your words when provoked, and to forgive those who have wronged you is a mark of strength and maturity.

It’s important to clarify that embracing this path does not mean you should become a doormat, allowing others to insult you, trample over your rights or oppress you. A Muslim should always stand up for themselves and not allow anyone to humiliate them.

That aside, you should recognize that every act of patience, restraint, and forgiveness elevates your status in the eyes of Allah and sets you apart as someone who truly embodies these noble traits.

Consider the profound teachings found in the Sahifah of ‘Amr bin Su’ayb, where the Messenger of Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him) spoke about the Day of Judgment:

“When Allah will gather the people on the Day of Judgement a caller will call: ‘Where are the people of patience?’

A small group of people will stand up and move hastily to Paradise; the angels will meet them and ask: ‘We see that you are hurrying to Paradise; who are you?’

They will reply: ‘We are the people of favour.’

‘What was the cause of your favour?’ they will ask.

They will say:

‘Whenever we were wronged we remained patient, when we were ill- treated, we forgave, and when someone acted cruelly toward us, we showed forbearance.’

They will be told: ‘Enter Paradise; excellent is the reward of those who do good deeds. ” (Ibn Abi Al-Dunya in Al-Hilm)

Additionally, the Prophet peace be upon him also said, “I guarantee a house in Jannah for one who gives up arguing, even if he is in the right; and I guarantee a home in the middle of Jannah for one who abandons lying even for the sake of fun; and I guarantee a house in the highest part of Jannah for one who has good manners.” (Riyad as-Salihin 629)

This teaching serves as a powerful reminder that patience, forgiveness, and kindness not only reflect our character but also pave the way for a rewarding and elevated status both on this earth and in the Hereafter.

As much as this message is for everyone, it is particularly relevant to men who often face criticism or ridicule for expressing emotions such as affection, compassion, or gentleness. It is essential to recognize that the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, exemplified the highest form of gentle masculinity. He was not only the commander-in-chief of the Muslim army but also the revered leader of an entire nation. Despite the weight of these responsibilities, he was celebrated for his profound tenderness toward his wives, his playful and kind demeanour with children, and his empathetic approach toward his neighbours and companions.

A great example is an incident during the prophet’s time when a Bedouin urinated in the mosque. Some of the persons stood up (to reprimand him or to check him from doing so), but the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: Leave him alone; don’t interrupt him. He (the narrator) said: And when he had finished, he called for a bucket of water and poured it over. (Sahih Muslim 284a)

And in another occasion a man demanded his debts from Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) in such a rude manner that the companions of the Prophet intended to harm him, but the Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Leave him, no doubt, for he (the creditor) has the right to demand it (harshly). Buy a camel and give it to him.” They said, “The camel that is available is older than the camel he demands. “The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Buy it and give it to him, for the best among you are those who repay their debts handsomely. “
(Sahih al-Bukhari 2390)

Throughout history, it is clear how the prophet’s gentleness extended to all, setting a powerful example of how strength and compassion can coexist. Yet, that did not make him weak or powerless.

As such, let us not allow societal pressures or misconceptions to diminish our self-worth when we strive to embody the qualities of the Prophet. Instead, we should take pride in nurturing traits that are deeply cherished by Allah. Showing love, kindness, and gentleness is not a sign of weakness but rather an indication of true strength of character.

Aisha, the beloved wife of the Prophet, reported a significant teaching of his: “Verily, Allah is gentle and He loves gentleness in all matters.” (Sahih al Bukhari 6927) This profound wisdom, encourages us to incorporate gentleness into every aspect of our lives, reinforcing the idea that compassion is at the core of a fulfilling and righteous existence.

by
Keep Reading
2025 Exclusive Ramadhan Musings

Then what is your thought of the Lord of the Worlds?

By

There was a time when I was so close to achieving a significant milestone. However, I didn’t accomplish the goal. Naturally, I was gripped by sadness and disappointment. In this moment of grief over what could have been, a close friend spoke words that would stay with me forever. “I’m so excited for you,” she said. Naturally, I asked, “Why?” With warmth in her voice, she replied, “Imagine—at one point, you thought this opportunity was the best you’d ever come across. Then Allah took it away. Now, think about the greater opportunity He has waiting for you. Aren’t you curious to see what He has in store?”

Her perspective ignited a deep reflection within me. How often do we fail to see the wisdom in Allah’s plan? When something is taken from us, it’s not a loss—it’s simply a redirection toward something even better. Amid darkness, it’s difficult to see the light. Yet, Islam teaches us that our belief in the future must be grounded in the trust that what comes next will surpass what we’ve lost. Allah Subhanahu Wataala reminds us in the Qur’an:
فما ظنكم برب العالمين

(Qur’an 37:87) “Then what is your thought of the Lord of the worlds?”

In another instance, I recall a time when I sold my thriving business to my sister, only for the sales to drop considerably in the following weeks. Her response, rather than filled with frustration, was one of complete trust: “Maybe it was other people’s rizq passing through your hands.” Her optimism reflected an unshakable faith in Allah’s wisdom and plan. Subhanallah.

فما ظنكم برب العالمين

Do you pause to reflect on His mercy? Do you acknowledge His love even in times of hardship? Can you feel the strength of that unwavering faith—knowing that Allah is with you, guiding your path with infinite care?

Consider someone you hold dear—a parent, sibling, or best friend. You trust them implicitly, believing in their loyalty and love without hesitation. If your faith in humans can be this strong, shouldn’t your trust in the One who created you, the One who has more mercy for you than even your mother, be unshakable? Allah promises that His mercy covers everything, and He is always with us, ensuring our affairs are in His
hands.

The mindset we adopt shapes the life we experience. What we believe to be true often manifests in our reality. Allah Subhanahu Wataala says, “I am as My servant expects of Me. If he expects good from Me, he will find it. If he expects evil from Me, he will find it.” (Sahih Ibn Hibban 639)

A very dear friend of mine once shared an inspiring story from her time in Canada. She and her partner were a young couple in a new environment when, in the middle of a freezing night at 2 a.m., their baby fell ill. They had no car, no money, and the buses were not operating at that hour.

Amidst their fear and worry, the couple decided to put their trust in Allah, believing that “Allah will bring His kheyr.” In 1997, they began their walk to the hospital, facing harsh cold and difficult, snow-covered paths. Just when the situation seemed insurmountable, a blue car appeared seemingly out of nowhere. The man inside greeted them with “Assalam aleykum” and inquired about their plight. He generously offered them a ride to the hospital and even expressed his willingness to wait for them. To this day, the woman believes that he was an angel, a true Godsend, reminding us of the miracles that can occur when we have faith.

Reflect, for a moment, on the story of Prophet Musa (alayhi salam). When he and his people fled from Pharaoh and his army, they reached a dead end at the Red Sea. While many would have panicked, Prophet Musa didn’t. He didn’t cry out, “We’re doomed, there’s no escape!” Instead, he calmly said, “My Lord is with me, He will guide me.” And indeed, Allah split the sea, guiding them to safety.

Abu’l-‘Abbaas al-Qurtubi (may Allah have mercy on him) explained that to think positively of Allah is to expect that He will respond to your prayers (du’a), forgive your sins when you repent, and accept your good deeds when they are done per His will. This trust in His promises is central to our faith.

In contrast, negativity often arises when we underestimate Allah’s greatness, His all-encompassing wisdom, and the precision of His divine plans. By focusing on doubts and fears, we leave space for pessimism to grow, causing us to overlook Allah’s strength and His guiding hand. In doing so, we create unnecessary hardship and suffering in our lives.

There’s a profound lesson in the story of the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) visiting a sick Bedouin. The Prophet (ﷺ) reassured him, saying, “No harm will befall you! May Allah cure you!” The Bedouin responded skeptically, “You say, ‘may Allah cure me’? But it’s a fever that will lead me to the grave.” The Prophet (ﷺ) replied, “Yes, then may it be as you say.” Soon after, the man passed away.

This teaches us that if we think Allah cannot lift us from our hardships, He won’t. If we believe that nothing good is meant for us, we will continue to feel stuck. But if we trust in His mercy and greatness, our lives will be filled with possibility and grace.

To conclude, let us remind ourselves: even when life feels overwhelming, we must never forget the greatness of our Lord. Never underestimate His power to provide, protect, and guide. This reminder is not just for today but for every moment of our lives.

Ibn Abi Dunyaa (rahimahullah) mentions in Having Good Thoughts About Allah that Abdullah Ibn Mas’ood (radhiyAllahu ‘anhu) swore by Allah, saying: “A believing servant has not been given anything better than having good expectations of Allah.”

He also said, “I swear by the One who is the only One worthy of worship, that no servant who perfects their assumptions about Allah will ever be let down. Allah will grant them what they have assumed, and all goodness lies in His hands.”

And so, dear reader, my question to you today, “Then what is your thought of the Lord of the worlds?!”

by
Keep Reading
2025 Exclusive Ramadhan Musings

The Relief is Coming

By

We’ve all had that one dua, or several, that brought us down to our knees—a desperate plea, a heart-wrenching request, something that brings tears to our eyes the moment it’s mentioned. “Please pray for us to have a child.”

“I am miserable at my workplace. I need a new job.”

“I’m so stressed from all my debts…”

“I wish I could get married too.”

“Please remember my sick daughter in your duas…”

“I keep praying for my spouse to change…”It goes on and on.

We’ve all experienced that sense of helplessness and heartache, longing for our prayers to be answered. It may have been days, months, or even years of waiting, praying, begging, and pleading, telling anyone willing to listen to please pray for us. In the midst of all this heaviness and desperation comes the ultimate submission to Allah. We realize that this world, with all its riches, is insignificant and powerless, except when Allah wills it.

During these trying times, Shaitan is particularly active, looking for any opportunity to instil hopelessness in us, to make us believe that Allah can’t hear us or won’t respond. He wants to make us abandon acts of worship, making us think, “What’s the point if Allah won’t answer my pleas?”

Imagine a child eagerly wanting to swim in the deeper side of the pool. They see their friends confidently swimming in that part, having fun and enjoying themselves, and they desperately want to join them. But as the parent, you know that they’re not quite ready for the deeper end. If they jump in too soon, they might struggle, get overwhelmed, or even hurt themselves. So, you guide them to the shallow end, where they can gradually learn, gain confidence, and build strength. You might give them a floater or a swimsuit to help them feel safe and secure.From the child’s perspective, though, they don’t understand why they can’t jump into the deeper end right away. They see their friends thriving there, and they cry or beg to join, feeling left out. But as a parent, you know they need more time, more practice, and more preparation before they’re ready to swim safely in deeper waters.

In the same way, when we make duas and pray for things — a job, a marriage, a child, a change, an opportunity — we often see others who seem to have what we desire, and we feel frustrated or impatient. But Allah, in His wisdom, knows we might not yet be equipped to handle the blessings we ask for. Like the child, we may long for what we see others enjoying, but the “not yet” answer isn’t a rejection; it’s a form of preparation. Just as a child needs time in the shallow end to build their skills and confidence, we, too, need time to grow, learn, and become ready for the deeper blessings ahead. The deeper end will come when we are truly ready to thrive there.

No matter how difficult a situation may seem and how long it may take, find comfort in this: Abu Razin reported that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Allah laughs at the despair of His servant, for He will soon relieve him.” I once asked, “O Messenger of Allah, does the Lord laugh?” The Prophet replied, “Yes.” I then said, “We will never be deprived of goodness by a Lord who laughs!” (Source: Sunan Ibn Mājah 181)

Beloved reader, Allah knows. Allah knows. Allah knows. Do not let Shaitan lead you to despair. Remember how many times we have witnessed women, past their menopause, give birth after years of waiting? How often have we seen Allah reunite loved ones after decades of separation? Take, for example, the families in Palestine, often separated for years but eventually reuniting. And how many people have married after it seemed hopeless? (Just recently, I read about a 63-year-old woman who got married for the first time.) Consider how Allah has sent strangers to those in distress and debt, who unexpectedly paid everything off, providing them with a fresh start. Isn’t the Qalby Etmaan program just one illustration of many ways Allah brings relief to countless individuals? Subhanallah!

I know it may not seem like it right now. Your desires might feel too far-fetched, unattainable, or impossible. But remember who your Lord is. He is the Lord of Musa (alayhi ssalam), who parted the sea; the Lord of Ayub, who healed him after years of suffering; the Lord of Ibrahim (alayhi ssalam), who was unharmed by the fire; the Lord of Maryam, who was granted a miraculous pregnancy; and the Lord of Umar ibn Khattab, who transformed from being the greatest enemy of Islam to one of its staunchest supporters. Indeed, nothing is impossible.Hang in there.

This Ramadan, do not stop making your dua(s). Instead, elevate them with more passion, conviction, hope, and faith in Allah.It was narrated from Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no Muslim who calls upon Allaah with words in which there is no sin or severing of family ties but Allaah will give him one of three things: either He will answer his prayer soon, or He will store it up for him in the Hereafter, or He will remove something bad from him that is equivalent to what he is asking for.” They said, “Then we should make a great amount of du’aa’.” He said, “Allaah is greater.”Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 3573; classed as saheeh by al-Tirmidhi and others.

In another hadith, It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “(The du’aa’) of any one of you will be answered so long as he is not hasty in seeking a response and does not say, ‘I prayed but I have not had a response.’” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5981; Muslim, 2735

Search for that long-awaited response, dear reader. Although the relief you seek may not have arrived just yet, it is steadily approaching, like the first light of dawn breaking through a dark night. Hold onto hope, for it is on its way to you. It is coming, and with it, peace and resolution will follow. It is coming. The relief is coming.

P.S: It’s the first Friday of Ramadhan alhamdulilah. Seek the hour of acceptance of dua (sa3t Al istijabah) and pour your heart to Allah. May all that you utter in sincerity be granted to you with abundance, ameen. Allah’s Messenger (ﷺp.b.u.h) talked about Friday and said, “There is an hour (opportune time) on Friday and if a Muslim gets it while praying and asks something from Allah, then Allah will definitely meet his demand.” And he (the Prophet) pointed out the shortness of that time with his hands. (Sahih al-Bukhari 935)Please remember me and my family in your duas 🙂

by
Keep Reading

Powered by WordPress